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You are interested in gay almost-sex because you write about it all the time. Fun fact: The vast majority of readers of man-on-man gay romance novels are older straight women.Quote:
Originally Posted by Tasha
WON is MARRIED and I'm not interested in any sexual activity of any kind.Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterV
Hey, now that's a fun fact.
Maybe Karen should write a gay romance novel.
Oh wait, that's what she's doing, never mind.
You know, for an asexual American born Jamaican forty-something woman she sure has a strong interest in gay men; not so much the physical as the social and emotional aspects of homosexuals existing in this world, flirting and hooking up.
But for reasons unknown Karen falls short of getting "nasty."
She doesn't write about anal sex, felching, cock sucking or any of the other rites of passage, and it would be more interesting than her describing their breakfast menu in excruciating detail..
Billy and Axl did have anal sex VERY early on in their relationship, twice, but I since said they kiss and cuddle. Axl Rose is a real person, so I don't want him to possibly sue me for having my Fictional Axl Rose constantly having sex with Billy. So I kept the sex two times and stopped. Hell, he might take offense at my Fictional Axl Rose kissing and cuddling with a man/having a Boyfriend. I kept my Fictional Older Axl straight however.Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterV
Axl and Billy should invent a new gay sex act: poking each other's eyes with their dicks. It's like 69, but causes more eye infections.
Tasha, just kidding about poking each other's eyes with their dicks. Then it would be very hard for them to see while playing on stage at the James L. Knight Center.
Or have them get on their knees side by side and start jerking off.
The "Winner" is he who's load of cum is shot the furthest distance.
The "Loser" has to clean the bathroom.
*psssst....bet on the younger guy*
Maybe have their contests secretly videoed and posted online, going viral, inducing the I.O.C. to introduce it as a new event at the next Olympic games?
Would competitive ejaculating fall under water sports?Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterV
Eew. :eek:Quote:
Originally Posted by pinchingyourballsWould competitive ejaculating fall under water sports?Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterV
Axl and Billy cuddled under the covers on the couch in the luxurious penthouse suite at the James L. Knight Center. They were eating bagels with cream cheese and drinking orange juice with a splash of limoncello. On the telly was an old episode of the Maury show. They giggled at the antics of fat ghetto guests, and also at the equally ghetto audience members who were too dumb to realize it was all staged and most of the guests were out of work actors.Quote:
Originally Posted by Tasha
"I'm glad we are characters in a gay romance novel!" Axl said to Billy with deep affection.
"Me too!" replied Billy trying his best to match Axl's enthusiasm. But all was not right with Billy. Not right at all.
You see, last night he had secretly stayed awake trying to compute by hand the set of eigenvalues of an N by N matrix whose (i, j)th entries were defined by a simple formula 1+a^i*b^j for distinct real numbers a and b with a, b both greater than 1. The general formula for the set of eigenvalues for such a matrix had absolutely no real-world or Fan Fiction world applications whatsoever, it was merely mental masturbation. But finding a pattern or general formula in terms of a, b, and N proved difficult and he laid awake wondering if he was a bad mathematician, or a good mathematician who worked on bad problems. Suddenly he was snapped out of his train of thought by the eardrum shattering sound of a hot wet queef-fart. Axl heard the noise too.
"Did you hear that?"
"Yeah, it sounded like it came from behind the couch."
In a paranoid frenzy, Billy and Axl jumped from the couch and tried to move it away from the wall. It proved very difficult. Mike walked in on them and gave them a hand. With the combined power of three poofs, they managed to move the couch 5 inches away from the wall. They peered into the black abyss and saw two eyes and a set of teeth, like the Cheshire cat. In horror they jumped back, fearing it was a ghost. But then the ghost spoke with a familiar voice.
"Don't mind me guys, I just like listening to your conversations so I can get material for the story!"
Tasha-Kentry had a sleepless night, tossing, turning, her mind feverishly flip-flopping like a carp out of water.
But FINALLY...she knew.
"I'm a male homosexual in the body of a woman: that must be it! Why else am I so attracted to homosexual sex between two men?"
So she wrote herself into her time traveling / doppelganger mess-ter-piece interjecting herself into the boudoir of her protagonist, ready to test her identity theory.
"Hello boys, I am your Creator."
They shook hands and thanked her and she welcomed them.
"It seems I was wrong; I thought I was asexual but I now realize that I am a homosexual man, just like the two of you, but I am trapped in the body of a woman."
After brief discussion Tasha-Kentry took her clothes off and got on the water bed with Axl and Bllie; "OK, now what? How does this "sex thing" go down, anyway?"
"We caress each other gently to start" answered Axl; he began his explorations then yelled "Eureka! I've found it!"
He explained that he discovered her REAL problem: "Tasha-Kentry, you are a hermaphrodite."
"No, I'm a Baptist."
"No, I mean you have the sexual organs of both a man and a woman, that is why you're confused. Look, see this?"
He pointed to a dangling bit of flesh in her crotch.
"This isn't a clit, it's a penis. And look, immediately behind it is a vagina."
It was as if a light bulb had gone off in her noggin.
"I think I get it; Since I have both I've wanted neither."
"Exactly! You are so lucky, dearie: you really CAN "have it all." Here, let me show you a neat trick. Get on your knees"
With that he took her penis and inserted its tip into her vagina, saying "Now we need to stimulate you, make the blood flow."
Axl rimmed Tasha-Kentry for what seemed an eternity, causing her to moan and whimper as her cock expanded and filled her vagina, flooding her with new-found sensations of warmth, happiness and tingling joy.
"OK, here we go..."
He roughly inserted his lubed torpedo into her winking anus while Billie stuck his throbbing love missile down her throat.
"Mmmmpphhhh" said Tasha-Kentry: she was finally complete with her new-found trifecta.
Abby Garn was crouched behind the window of the kitchen of the luxurious penthouse suite in the James L Knight Center. Yes, I know what a penthouse is. She was defying the laws of physics and hovering mid-air. From her perch she overheard the whole hullabaloo involving members of Cake Cream finding Tasha queefing behind their couch. Abby was recording the sounds of their shrieks and farts so that she could resample them and make her own hit song with the help of her producer boyfriend Kewlio "Dawg" Singer.
After Abby procured enough hours of recording, she took them back to the studio. Kewlio "Dawg" Singer recorded her playing a few chords on a guitar and singing a few bars of a melody he had come up with in the shower. Then he worked his magic and created the hit song of the summer. Abby was ecstatic. Agents of other bands were blowing up her phone wanting to do collabs and seeing if she was available as an opening act. Abby finally realized her dream of opening for Cake Cream at the James L Knight Center.
All was going well during her set when suddenly there was a horrible shaking and low moaning coming from the floor itself. Shit, we're all falling into a sink hole, she mused. Abby kept playing for as long as the power stayed on. In a matter of minutes, Abby Garn, everyone in Cake Cream, Tasha (who always hides backstage during their shows) and 3000 retarded fans were swallowed up by Gaia.
Oh my God, you managed to put THREE different Posters into one name! LMAO! :DQuote:
Originally Posted by pinchingyourballs
Thank you for reading and appreciating my art. I haven't yet found a way to combine 4 VCT forum names into a single character, but maybe you can give it a try. Kewl, Dawg, and Singer naturally go together as they are three sides of the same coin. Maybe you can create a character who shows up for just one chapter, like a fan who tries to sneak backstage, or a grocery store clerk who is too chatty and asks Axl and the gang about all the breakfast items they are buying.
A Fan did sneak backstage and filmed Axl and Billy kissing after a Cake Cream Show and Uploaded it to YouTube. Axl and Billy were still in the closet when the Fan filmed and Uploaded the video. The kissing video went viral and Billy and Axl publicly admitted that they were dating each other.Quote:
Originally Posted by pinchingyourballs
Axl and Billy should get married by now.
Also I think you should introduce an enigmatic female character who likes gambling. She is a lottery winner from Florida who happens to have millions of dollars to spend, so she sometimes hires Cake Cream to do private shows at lavish parties she throws in Miami. Since she is a lottery winner who no longer has to work at her old minimum wage job, she spends her free time pursuing her passion for writing. One night, one of the Cake Cream members accidentally sees some of her writing samples while they are at her mansion doing a show, and they decide she is such a good writer that they ask her to write songs for them.
Mr V and Pinching, here is a copy and paste of the Chapter where Billy and Axl had sex.
I decided that the real world Axl might want to sue me if my Fictional Axl kept having sex with another man, so I just have Billy and Axl cuddle and kiss after this chapter. ;)Quote:
Billy shyly asked Axl if he wanted to sleep in Billy's bed. Axl said,,"Yes," with a big smile. Billy smiled too. They both climbed into Billy's bed. Billy lovingly massaged Axl's gunshot wounds, and Axl felt loved and comfortable. Then Billy kissed him on the mouth and Axl kissed him back. After kissing, Billy asked him,"Where do we go? Where do we go? Where do we go now?" And Axl smiled. They snuggled together and fell asleep.
They woke up in the morning about 3 AM. They were still hiding their relationship from Cake Cream. Billy and Axl decided they wanted to go book a Hotel Room just them two. They packed their Suitcases, showered and dressed. Then they ordered a LYFT to the Local Marriott while the rest of Cake Cream were all asleep and left with the suitcases when their LYFT arrived. They went to the Local Marriott and booked a Hotel Room for just them two.
They settled in and made out with wild abandon and passion. Axl and Billy had brought condoms, and lubricant with them and wanted to make love to each other. Axl put on the condom and lubed up Billy and entered Billy, face to face and made gentle love to him. They also kissed sensually while doing the gentle lovemaking. They both loved this. As Axl came, he held Billy's hand. Billy moaned with pleasure as this happened.
The lovemaking was something they both wanted. After Axl in Billy lovemaking happened, Billy said he wanted to return the favor and Axl was up for this. Billy got a new condom and lubed up Axl and put the condom on him and entered Axl this time. They were face to face once again and Billy was also gentle with the lovemaking he did to and Billy and Axl did more sensual kissing. They loved the gentle lovemaking and sensual kissing. As Billy came, he held Axl's hand too and Axl also found himself moaning with pleasure. After the lovemaking, they showered, showering each other luxuriously and making out again. They finished showering, toweled off, and got dressed and went to sleep together.
Axl woke up about 9 and saw he had missed calls from Andy, Mike, James, and Jimmy and the voicemails were basically asking him where the hell were Axl and Billy. Axl looked at Billy sleeping peacefully with a smile on his face and Axl smirked. He enjoyed the lovemaking he and Billy had done. Billy woke up a little while later and also saw he had missed calls from Andy,Mike,James, and Jimmy that had voicemails asking him where the hell were he and Axl. Billy and Axl looked at each other and smirked mischievously. Billy and Axl made out with each other again. After they made out, they ordered Room Service and ate and drank and got ready for the day.
Since you included the minor irrelevant details about them showering and ordering a LYFT (as opposed to Uber) perhaps next time you write a butt sex scene you should also mention that the receiver(s) took a dump. Because what if the ol' in-out in the butt made one of them have to go #2 really urgently? Probably best to void the bowels beforehand.
BTW, anyone who ever votes you worst VCT member has zero taste in trolls. You are par excellence among trolls.
In that Chapter, it's weird that I mentioned that they showered at around 3 AM, and then showered again after having sex. I think realistically you would just shower after the sex, right? :confused:Quote:
Originally Posted by pinchingyourballs
Also, Billy and Axl sitting around making out, eating room service and just hanging out when they knew their Friends were worried about them was weird too, luckily the very next Chapter I wrote that Billy and Axl called Jimmy, Mike, Andy, and James that they were okay.
So Karen, what is the next adventure for Cake Cream and the spun off trio?
Might I suggest they compete against each other in a Battle of the Bands?
Oh, don't forget to work "DQ strawberry blizzards" in there somewhere, it's always a plot point.
Today was the big day. Kentry had finally saved up enough money to take him and his girlfriends Tasha and Karice to Vegas for a special romantic getaway, just the three of them. As they boarded their plane in Miami, Tasha and Karice sat up front in first class while Kentry made his way back to shrieking toddlers with bleary-eyed parents class. He had decided to forgo a first class ticket for himself so that his special ladies might have a little more fun money. He prayed to Vishnu he wasn't seated near any humans who had spent fewer than 6 years on this spinning rock. But seeing as he was in the middle of a three-seat row, what he should have prayed for was to not be squashed between two fatties.
"Scuse me!" wheezed a fatty who eyed the window seat on Kentry's right. The fatty profusely apologized as his mass pushed Kentry to the left. Just then another fatty waddled down the aisle. To Kentry's horror, that fatty's eyes were fixed on the aisle seat to Kentry's left.
"Scuse me!" wheezed fatty number two as he pushed Kentry into an impossible position. The two fatties, by merely existing in their seats, managed to squish Kentry so hard that he disappeared. The fatties did not notice the soft popping sound or the accompanying sparkling fairy dust that burst out from the spot where Kentry had been. They had already fallen fast asleep and were snoring like tractors.
When the plane landed in Las Vegas, fatty number one woke up and looked at his companion. Had there not been a skinny man sitting between us? he mused. Fatty number tapped his companion's jiggling mass to wake him up.
"Rob dot Singer, wake up. We landed. Where'd that skinny dude go? I coulda sworn that when we boarded there was someone sitting here in the middle seat."
Fatty number two woke up and observed.
"That's weird, Dawg. I coulda sworn the same thing. You think he went to the bathroom?"
"Maybe. It will be a great story to tell Kewl when he picks us up. It's a good thing he got that handicap parking permit for being morbidly obese like us. Airport parking and pick up is the worst."
Then they had a hearty laugh at all the skinny plebes who didn't have handicap permits.