Originally Posted by
Mission146
Monet,
I know exactly what you're talking about.
Personally, the irony that I see in this situation is that Singer thinks he is making some kind of a point by shaming me (and bringing totally unrelated things into it) for being overly generous to strangers, but I wouldn't directly shame someone for being a non-tipper. I've also never met a true non-tipper, though I am not claiming that none exist.
In my opinion, it's that person's money to do or not do with as they please. If they do not see not tipping as saying, "Your service to me has no value to me," then I cannot change their perspective. The only thing that I will do is make decisions to not eat out with them accordingly because I don't want to be in a position (separate checks or splitting the check) where I feel the need to add to my already very generous tip to compensate for the fact that they don't tip.
Thus, I won't judge such a person...but I'm also never going out to eat with them more than once.
I agree with Monet as to the other points. I've bartended, done delivery, delivered newspapers and worked both as hotel front desk and as a hotel manager. I've also done jobs where one doesn't normally get tips (but is allowed to accept them, if offered).
There's nothing that quite perks a person who works in the service industry up as much as receiving a generous tip. Not even so much because it tells them they have done a great job---you know what kind of job you are doing, regardless of whether or not the customer tips you. It mainly perks you up just because it is a better than expected (financial) result from that customer and it's also pleasant just to have another person be exceedingly nice to you for no real reason.
So, I don't strictly view a heavy tip as being just about the money. I look at it as a way that I can make a stranger's day better, and if the little bit extra than they were expecting from me makes a meaningful financial difference to that person, then that's just a bonus.