Trip Report: Lost the girl, won at craps

[Alan Mendelson]

I was living in Vegas for only about ten days before I got the heave-ho. I continued my business in Vegas. Most of what I do is done online and with phone calls and text messaging (which was also the source of my problem), and I only shoot and edit videos a couple of days a month.

[regnis]

Wow--you never think stuff like this happens in real life--only in the movies. Glad you got out without too much downside. And despite what I am about to say, I do sympathize.

Now for the lecture that I give to all of my friends who have been divorced and are now on their second and third wives (or wives to be). What was your effing hurry. You barely knew this woman. They all have some baggage and you need to figure it out before you get that serious. Date her--live with her--but why get married so quickly. And while you luckily didn't need one here---PRENUP!!!!!

This has been a public service announcement.

[FABismonte]

Sorry to hear that Alan. I concur that it is better to have found out her true nature now, rather than later. At least the Thread Title is now accurate!

FAB

[redietz]

Sorry to hear that Alan. I concur that it is better to have found out her true nature now, rather than later. At least the Thread Title is now accurate!

FAB

Yes, if this hadn't happened now, it would have happened in some worse way down the road. You dodged a disaster.

Regnis, an old friend of mine said he never slept with a girl he hadn't known for at least 10 years. The older we get, the more he sounds as if he knew what he was talking about.

[regnis]

I'm all for the sleeping with. But there are just too many other issues when someone our age, who has children from a previous marriage, hooks up with a new lady. You have to put the brakes on impulse and take care of business. And you have to protect your children, even fully grown ones.

Of course I am a confirmed bachelor who got married for the only reason that really counts---health insurance. Been together almost 40 years, married almost half of those.

[a2a3dseddie]

Wow... that's a crazy month you've had Alan!

Do you think she was using you as a "back-up plan" in case her PhD aspirations didn't work out? Or is she just bat shit crazy?

[james40]

I was living in Vegas for only about ten days before I got the heave-ho. I continued my business in Vegas. Most of what I do is done online and with phone calls and text messaging (which was also the source of my problem), and I only shoot and edit videos a couple of days a month.

Alan, on 3/5 you report you broke up with your GF and on 4/4 you report you got married to another woman. Not a believer in long courtships are you? I married my wife after a couple of years of dating and was worried I was rushing it.

[Alan Mendelson]

Janet and I broke up in March, then we got married on April 3rd, and then she sent me packing two weeks later. Same woman. Not another woman.

[pkspins]

I was confused too. I thought the woman you married was the chef at a Vegas hotel that you mentioned in your first post. I didn't realize it was the woman you broke up with in your first post.

[Alan Mendelson]

The chef and I had one meeting... for lunch... and not at her restaurant. Who knows? I might see her again. We actually chatted on the phone last night: it was a "haven't heard from you in a while, what's up?" call. Wow, was she surprised that I told her since meeting her I was married, moved to Vegas, then became unmarried and was back in Southern Cal.

[quahaug]

The chef and I had one meeting... for lunch... and not at her restaurant. Who knows? I might see her again. We actually chatted on the phone last night: it was a "haven't heard from you in a while, what's up?" call. Wow, was she surprised that I told her since meeting her I was married, moved to Vegas, then became unmarried and was back in Southern Cal.

I wouldn't expect another call if I were you.

[Rob.Singer]

People, you are all so missing what has happened here. And I do feel bad for Alan--these type of misfortunes & hassles should not be experienced at his age.

However, if you remember, I said the circumstances surrounding this 4th (!) marriage "didn't bode well". Not surprisingly, the common sense behind what I said either went straight thru all the holes in your heads, or you do the same things you do whenever anything awkward or that makes no real sense about someone you idolize comes up--you pretend you didn't just read it or you make believe it doesn't exist. It's typical of weak-willed individuals, which is why you all should be so thankful I'm always here to pull you back into reality.

Folks, Alan's a serial marry-divorce-remarry addict and everyone (including him) knows it. It's in his DNA....it's not like queers who make a choice to be weird....he simply can't help what he does. It is truly something that is very disheartening to watch of a fine human being. That said, none of us are him; none of us have gotten close enough to this woman to have any real clue as to what her motivations are, what goes thru her head, etc. So to be judging her is to be insensitive and somewhat ignorant.

OTOH, we do have way more than enuf information about Alan, which is why I recommended against his racing off to Las Vegas FOR WHATEVER REASONS to live and come face-to-face with his Achilles heal: his insatiable craving to be in and around gambling action. He finally found a HUGE enough reason to go live there: "marriage". Come up with any excuse you want--he was bound to give it a go that would cause him nothing but grief eventually.

This lady as described is an intelligent woman, with a naturally enhanced detection/deduction system due to having to suffer the effects of the dreaded disease called cancer. So I wouldn't be inclined as to brush her part of the story off the table just yet.

Think about it--Alan's been posting like a little boy in a candy store as he tooled around "his" town where the gambling action never ceases. And for someone who wrote about every excuse in the book for reasons why he "just decided to take off for Vegas in the middle of the night from LA" so many many times, and who now has a penchant for the very hi-limit video poker machines who also amazingly can't keep $100,000 jackpots in his pockets....we'll, let's just say my prediction wasn't very far off from being a direct hit.

I'm not buying that a bill-paying mix-up had much to do with this. It's filler, if you know what I mean. And I'm not getting many positive vibes from this loan-shark story either, although in a darker world or in any movie about moving to LV, it would fit in rather nicely. But what I DO have a high probability of belief about here is how uncomfortable a new spouse got from suddenly having to see a problem gambler in her home.

Nuff said.

[Biloxi Bill]

At least she appeared to be a pleasant looking woman, which judging by what everyone here has seen, you`ve never experienced lol

[Rob.Singer]

And at least you're smart enuf to agree with something most of you wussies are afraid to even think about without the need to be led to it first.

Oh, let's see....a wrecked marriage with a younger pretty woman--or a 38+ year marriage with a woman an anonymous internet hack thinks is (wait--he NEEDS her to be) unattractive at 64.

Hmmm.... See why I'm the smartest person in the room here yet?

[Rob.Singer]

The chef and I had one meeting... for lunch... and not at her restaurant. Who knows? I might see her again. We actually chatted on the phone last night: it was a "haven't heard from you in a while, what's up?" call. Wow, was she surprised that I told her since meeting her I was married, moved to Vegas, then became unmarried and was back in Southern Cal.

I wouldn't be expecting to be striking up any type of relationship anytime soon after telling her that.

[Biloxi Bill]

And at least you're smart enuf to agree with something most of you wussies are afraid to even think about without the need to be led to it first.

Oh, let's see....a wrecked marriage with a younger pretty woman--or a 38+ year marriage with a woman an anonymous internet hack thinks is (wait--he NEEDS her to be) unattractive at 64.

Hmmm.... See why I'm the smartest person in the room here yet?

Sounds more like a sentence (for her also)...but in the end, as long as you`re happy.....also gives credence to that old ugly person`s mantra that "there`s someone for everybody"

[redietz]

I don't think Alan got married so he could gamble more. He has more than enough money to decide to retire tomorrow and gamble all day long if he chooses. He doesn't need an excuse.

Rob's writing in his usual obtuse style, but it seems he's suggesting Janet suddenly did a U-Turn because she discovered Alan gambles. That's pretty far fetched.

[Biloxi Bill]

Singer`s theme song~

[Rob.Singer]

I don't think Alan got married so he could gamble more. He has more than enough money to decide to retire tomorrow and gamble all day long if he chooses. He doesn't need an excuse.

Rob's writing in his usual obtuse style, but it seems he's suggesting Janet suddenly did a U-Turn because she discovered Alan gambles. That's pretty far fetched.

First you as well as I know nothing about Alan's financial state, so making assumptions based on an unknown fact is unwise.

Next, in scenarios like this where only one side is able to offer up their story, one can only try to put two and two together in the most sensible way. And what do we have? A very intelligent, possibly health-challenged (and maybe therefore troubled) woman who we're told does little to no gambling, has a habitual gambler and gambling-motivated media personality move into her apartment. It's certainly not a stretch to suspect that she was not at all prepared for living, breathing, eating, & talking gambling--and actual gambling--that likely ensued. And it's entirely possible that she may have come to the conclusion that she was more a means for him to get his more frequent fixes than she was a wife. Why else would someone supposedly happily married for two weeks show up at the door with two goons with annulment papers?

It would be very interested to hear her side of the story. That's all I'm saying. Until and if that ever happens, all we can do is opine. I believe my particular opinion is a product of having lived a long life dealing with many, many people and experiences.

[a2a3dseddie]

And I do feel bad for Alan--these type of misfortunes & hassles should not be experienced at his age.

"types"

OTOH, we do have way more than enuf information about Alan, which is why I recommended against his racing off to Las Vegas FOR WHATEVER REASONS to live and come face-to-face with his Achilles heal: his insatiable craving to be in and around gambling action.

"Achilles heel"

And for someone who wrote about every excuse in the book for reasons why he "just decided to take off for Vegas in the middle of the night from LA" so many many times, and who now has a penchant for the very hi-limit video poker machines who also amazingly can't keep $100,000 jackpots in his pockets....we'll, let's just say my prediction wasn't very far off from being a direct hit.

"well"

How did you ever get away with such illiteracy?