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Thread: Young Axl Rose and Cake Cream in 2022! :D

  1. #301
    There were investigations being done on Billy's burned down house and it was determined that the cause of the fire was bad electrical wiring.



    Cream Rose breathed sighs of relief. Billy wouldn't be getting arrested and jailed for Arson!



    Cream Rose ordered Room Service and ate, drank, and chilled.



    Axl said,"Let's all agree to not tell anyone else what REALLY caused the fire. We don't want Billy getting arrested and jailed for Arson. We wanna protect Billy, not help him get arrested and jailed."

    Cream Rose agreed to keep this their little secret.

    Billy and Axl had a room and everyone else had their own rooms. They soon fell asleep. In the middle of the night, Billy woke up, craving Cocaine badly. His body was screaming for it. He knew Axl would disapprove of him snorting Cocaine anywhere but the house, but the house was burned down and he needed to snort Cocaine ASAP. He left the room and went to the streets looking for a drug dealer. He found one and the Drug Dealer sold him Cocaine and Subutex. He thanked him and was welcomed. He went back to the hotel room. He snorted the Cocaine and felt satisfied. He then took the Subutex. He fell asleep.

    The next day, Cream Rose woke up, ate and got ready for the day. On Social Media, Posters were wondering about Cream Rose not being home when the house burned.

    Cream Rose responded,"It's a good thing we weren't home when the house burned."

    There were more skeptical Social Media posts and Axl claimed that Cream Rose was at the movie theaters working on a new song.

    Fans wanted to hear this supposed new song.

    Axl replied that they would perform the new song at the bar later that day. Fans were excited to hear this supposed new song.

    Axl wrote an updated version of Come together and just put a bunch of Pop Culture references and other nonsense.

    He wrote

    "Here come old Doobie brothers, here come old black water that keep rolling.

    Here come one Fire cracker, he one Mighty Morphin power ranger, he one mighty park ranger, he watch Stranger Things, he watch YouTube, he post on Twitter. He watch Netflix, he watch Game Of Thrones."

    Come Together, right now, over me.

    He 7 feet tall, he one giant, he says 5 and 5 is 10, now he's gonna hang 10 on an ocean wave.

    Come together, right now, over me.

    He eat at McDonald's, he go to Disney World and shake hands with Mickey, he drive a Jeep, he one cool cat.



    Come together right now over me.



    He drink Coca Cola, he stay at Marriott Hotel. He listen to Cream Rose songs.

    Come together right now over me "

    He got two eyes, he got one nose, he got one mouth."

    Come together, right now, over me.

    "I'm your Brother, I'm your Friend, we're one great Family.

    Come together, right now, over me.

    Axl had to chuckle at the nonsense he had just written and knew it was in the same vein as Come Together by The Beatles.

    Cream Rose also chuckled.

    They made plans to display this song at the bar soon.

    They got ready and Mike and Axl performed the duet at the bar and Fans loved it. They loved the updated and modern lyrics. There were laughter and wild cheering.

    Jimmy, James, Andy, and Billy also enjoyed the Duet. Mike and Axl smiled and got off the stage. Cream Rose had been wearing bulletproof vests and motorcycle helmets. They had Coke Soda and rum and were in a happy mood.
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/Zk2WAFzDcrJ7pjNB7

    Take comfort in the fact that no one is actually backing up his wishes to have you permanantly banned.


    Smart is knowing a Tomato is a fruit.

    Wise is knowing a Tomato doesn't belong in a fruit salad.



    I am glad to get my full posting rights back! Thank you Dan!

  2. #302
    One of the Cream Rose members was jealous of the hummers Billy got from Axl so he called the fire inspector and told him what REALLY caused the fire.

    The inspector returned to the fire scene and confirmed this new information.

    Billy was then arrested, charged, and convicted of "CAFWFU" i.e. "causing a fire while fucked up."

    The local jail was filled with the January 6th convicts, so as punishment Billy was consigned to the dunking stool.

    The local children threw stones at him, trying to hit his head: many succeeded.

    Axl got in a few shots, as did the members of Cream Rose.

    Billy was a bloody mess, but he smiled, shook their hands, thanked them all and they welcomed him.

    Covered in water and blood, hoisted up and down on a forty degree day, Billy chilled.

    Name:  dunking stool.jpg
Views: 239
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    What, Me Worry?

  3. #303
    Mr. V, I'm surprised how close part of your story is to the next chapter. You know the game of hot/cold, meaning cold means you're far away from object and hot meaning you're very close? Well, part of your story is BURNING hot so to speak.
    Last edited by Tasha; 02-12-2023 at 02:48 PM.
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/Zk2WAFzDcrJ7pjNB7

    Take comfort in the fact that no one is actually backing up his wishes to have you permanantly banned.


    Smart is knowing a Tomato is a fruit.

    Wise is knowing a Tomato doesn't belong in a fruit salad.



    I am glad to get my full posting rights back! Thank you Dan!

  4. #304
    Tasha got on the bus en route to the casino; the only empty seat was next to Axl.

    Nervous as a cat on a hot tin roof, Tasha asked him "Is this seat taken?"

    Axl looked up from the bestiality videos he was viewing on his i-phone; he looked her over and said "Does it look like it?"

    This surprised Tasha; she looked carefully at and under the seat, then said "No, it looks empty."

    She sat down.

    Axl eyed the dog porn on his phone, then had an idea.

    He asked her "Do you know who I am?"

    Tasha responded "Yes, you're Axl."

    She was perspiring.

    "That's right. Say, I was thinking that I need to fuck somebody; do you wanna fuck me?"

    "Sure, but what about Billy, your boy friend?"

    "He's on the dunking stool as we speak, dear lady, and my loins just won't be denied."

    They adjourned to the tiny, nasty smelling bathroom in the back of the bus and quickly accomplished a zipless fuck.

    Axl sat back down in his seat, fired up his i-phone again and studiously ignored Tasha.

    Ah, but she smiled knowingly, as she was at that moment made aware by her body that her egg had just been fertilized and she was now carrying his love child.

    She got off at the casino, and smiling at Axl said "I'll see you in nine months or so."

    Axl ignored her.
    What, Me Worry?

  5. #305
    They were having fun at the bar, but still the lingering doubts and uncertainty about Billy's house being accidentally burned down and what would happen if Billy was found to be the culprit. Although the cause of the fire was investigated to be bad electrical wiring, they all knew there was a chance Billy could still be caught. They also had no home to sleep in anymore. They were fuced if it was revealed that Billy accidentally caused the fire. They also had no home to go back to. They were fuced. After the bar, they went to the hotel.



    Axl thanked God he had digitally stored all the Contracts and they weren't just paper Contracts. Cream Rose was grateful too.



    Billy snuggled to Axl asking him to comfort him. He felt traumatized. Axl obliged him and comforted him, knowing that Billy needed his comfort and support.



    Axl caressed Billy's hair and said,"Where do we go? Where do we go? Where do we go now?" Billy smiled a little, through his traumatization. He was grateful he had Axl who loved him. Cream Rose also comforted Billy.Billy was also glad he had Andy, Mike, James and Jimmy who also loved him. Billy fell asleep.



    Cream Rose wondered what they would do. Billy was sure to become in big trouble with the law if the pizza was found to be the real cause of the fire, not bad electrical wiring.



    On the news, there was movie theater surveillance that showed that Billy, in fact, showed up later to the movie theater than the rest of Cream Rose, like HOURS later. Billy no longer had an airtight alibi, although the rest of Cream Rose did.



    No! Jimmy, Axl, Andy, Mike, and James cried in unison again. Billy was sure to be the number one Suspect with this new public info. They woke up Billy and told him the bad news.



    No! Billy cried horrified. Billy said,"You guys will still protect me, right? Cream Rose looked at each other uneasily, but they knew they had promised to protect Billy. Billy would have protected either one of them if any of them were in Billy's position.



    There was a Star Wars Convection going on and Axl, wearing a disguise and makeup that covered all of his tattoos bought 6 Darth Vader Costumes. His plan was to disguise himself and Cream Rose as Darth Vader, hiding Billy from the Authorities. He told them to all meet him at a secluded place and they agreed. At the secluded place, he gave all of them the Darth Vader Costumes and they went to the Star Wars Convection as Darth Vader. Problem was, LOTS of other People were also Darth Vader, not surprisingly. They decided to stay close to each other in order to not get separated. This was when Cream Rose's penchant for being really close to each other came in handy.



    They were entertained at the Star Wars Convection , looking like any other Darth Vader Fan. The Convection was over later and the 6 of them were able to walk into a Walgreens and put money on reloadable gift cards, and not look out of place due to the Star Wars Convection. They soon left. There were more Darth Vader Fans close by.



    Cream Rose actually made a plan to send Billy on the run, and Billy agreed. Cream Rose said their goodbyes to Billy, and he said them back, and Billy went to the crowd of other Darth Vader Fans and soon ran off into the night, undetected. Axl, Jimmy, James, Andy and Mike were glad Billy was able to get away.



    The news later that night pointed out that Billy was officially on the run and was a Fugitive.



    Axl's phone rang and "Unknown Caller," popped up on his Cellphone. Axl knew who it was.



    He answered. Billy said," I love you, Axl. Axl smiled and repeated it back. Billy and Axl made kissing noises over the phone, the implication clear. Billy said,"I'm at a payphone, I gotta run."



    Axl told him, "I understand."



    They quickly both hung up.



    Cream Rose couldn't believe that Billy was a Fugitive on the run. Technically, this was worse than when Axl was a Fugitive on the run since they all knew where Axl was and Axl was being hidden at Billy's house, which was now burned down. Oh, the bittersweet memories.
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/Zk2WAFzDcrJ7pjNB7

    Take comfort in the fact that no one is actually backing up his wishes to have you permanantly banned.


    Smart is knowing a Tomato is a fruit.

    Wise is knowing a Tomato doesn't belong in a fruit salad.



    I am glad to get my full posting rights back! Thank you Dan!

  6. #306
    Tasha beamed with pride as she pushed her newborn child into Judge V's chambers; they had been cordial toward one another for many years, ever since he'd represented her before his ascent to the bench.

    She had claimed to have been physically and sexually abused for years by various foster parents and while the jury awarded her nothing ("liiars never prosper" said the jury foreman) V did at least get a blow job for his troubles.

    "Well now, what have we here?" asked his honor.

    "It's my son, I call him "Axl."

    They chilled, smiled, smoked Kentucky Cheroots then got down to brass tacks.

    "Judge V, I need your help; I need to go after the father of my child to establish paternity and of course to collect as much child support as I can."

    Judge V smiled, thinking "I trained you well, grasshopper."

    "And who is the young man?"

    "Well, he's not really that young..." and she went off on a tangent, telling the jaded jurist about time travel, doppelgangers, and strawberry blizzards.

    "Now Tasha, I cannot help you myself, as much as I might want to, 'cause I'm a judge now; but my son can help you if you'd like."

    Tasha knew nothing of the judge's progeny but she graciously accepted the offer.

    "He's out chasing ambulances and handing out his card to accident victims at the hospital, but I'll have him call you tomorrow."

    With that the judge let out a truly obliterating fart; he guffawed and said "Gotcha!"

    They smiled and shook hands; she thanked the judge and he welcomed her.

    On the way home Tasha dreamed of how her life was about to change...
    Last edited by MisterV; 02-13-2023 at 07:22 PM.
    What, Me Worry?

  7. #307
    Originally Posted by ilovebigknockers View Post
    Natashathan pushed down one slat of her miniblinds to check if the man was still outside. He was. She had turned off all the lights in the house, save for the light inside the toaster oven where she was cooking a single serving no-contact boxed pizza. She farted softly. The man stood stock still about 5 yards from the house, directly across from her bedroom window. His face was obscured by a garrish plastic Axl Rose Halloween mask and a cheap costume wig. His left arm dangled at his side, his right held an ominous red helium balloon on a string.

    She stepped away from the window to attend to her pizza. When she came back to the window with a greasy paper plate in hand she gulped before pushing down the slat again. There he was, 2 yards closer and now holding 2 helium balloons. Natashathan screamed with all her breath, "What do you want???"

    Suddenly her phone vibrated. There was a new text message from an unknown number. It read, "boo." She looked again and there he was now a mere foot away from the window. In both hands he held dozens of helium balloons. She had never been more scared in her life and instinctively took a huge bite of her pizza to comfort herself. Unfortunately it was too big, and she began to choke. With no one in the house to perform the Heimlich maneuver, she perished.

    THE END
    Too bad ILBK has left us without going on about the lotto forums. Those must be interesting stories for Axl.

  8. #308
    Originally Posted by theywontpayontuesday View Post
    Originally Posted by ilovebigknockers View Post
    Natashathan pushed down one slat of her miniblinds to check if the man was still outside. He was. She had turned off all the lights in the house, save for the light inside the toaster oven where she was cooking a single serving no-contact boxed pizza. She farted softly. The man stood stock still about 5 yards from the house, directly across from her bedroom window. His face was obscured by a garrish plastic Axl Rose Halloween mask and a cheap costume wig. His left arm dangled at his side, his right held an ominous red helium balloon on a string.

    She stepped away from the window to attend to her pizza. When she came back to the window with a greasy paper plate in hand she gulped before pushing down the slat again. There he was, 2 yards closer and now holding 2 helium balloons. Natashathan screamed with all her breath, "What do you want???"

    Suddenly her phone vibrated. There was a new text message from an unknown number. It read, "boo." She looked again and there he was now a mere foot away from the window. In both hands he held dozens of helium balloons. She had never been more scared in her life and instinctively took a huge bite of her pizza to comfort herself. Unfortunately it was too big, and she began to choke. With no one in the house to perform the Heimlich maneuver, she perished.

    THE END
    Too bad ILBK has left us without going on about the lotto forums. Those must be interesting stories for Axl.

    Ilovebigknockers was just weird, joining JUST to rag and drag me. In MANY websites, joining a Website with the sole purpose of ragging and dragging a Long Time Member is grounds for an automatic ban.
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/Zk2WAFzDcrJ7pjNB7

    Take comfort in the fact that no one is actually backing up his wishes to have you permanantly banned.


    Smart is knowing a Tomato is a fruit.

    Wise is knowing a Tomato doesn't belong in a fruit salad.



    I am glad to get my full posting rights back! Thank you Dan!

  9. #309
    Originally Posted by Tasha View Post
    Ilovebigknockers was just weird, joining JUST to rag and drag me. In MANY websites, joining a Website with the sole purpose of ragging and dragging a Long Time Member is grounds for an automatic ban.
    Ah, but that is NOT the case at this forum; he ain't weird, he's just "contributing."

    Ilovebigknockers responded to my request that other forum viewers jump into the hot tub here and contribute whatever bit of whimsy crosses their mind in regard to your ongoing saga of mediocrity and ridiculousness.

    Tasha, I don't know how much thought you gave to your song of stupidity, but I simply "read and react."

    Am I ragging and dragging you too, and should I be banned for it?
    Last edited by MisterV; 02-14-2023 at 09:58 AM.
    What, Me Worry?

  10. #310
    Originally Posted by Tasha View Post
    Originally Posted by theywontpayontuesday View Post
    Originally Posted by ilovebigknockers View Post
    Natashathan pushed down one slat of her miniblinds to check if the man was still outside. He was. She had turned off all the lights in the house, save for the light inside the toaster oven where she was cooking a single serving no-contact boxed pizza. She farted softly. The man stood stock still about 5 yards from the house, directly across from her bedroom window. His face was obscured by a garrish plastic Axl Rose Halloween mask and a cheap costume wig. His left arm dangled at his side, his right held an ominous red helium balloon on a string.

    She stepped away from the window to attend to her pizza. When she came back to the window with a greasy paper plate in hand she gulped before pushing down the slat again. There he was, 2 yards closer and now holding 2 helium balloons. Natashathan screamed with all her breath, "What do you want???"

    Suddenly her phone vibrated. There was a new text message from an unknown number. It read, "boo." She looked again and there he was now a mere foot away from the window. In both hands he held dozens of helium balloons. She had never been more scared in her life and instinctively took a huge bite of her pizza to comfort herself. Unfortunately it was too big, and she began to choke. With no one in the house to perform the Heimlich maneuver, she perished.

    THE END
    Too bad ILBK has left us without going on about the lotto forums. Those must be interesting stories for Axl.

    Ilovebigknockers was just weird, joining JUST to rag and drag me. In MANY websites, joining a Website with the sole purpose of ragging and dragging a Long Time Member is grounds for an automatic ban.
    What did you do to piss him off? The whole idea of there being so many stupid people out there enough to participate in something just completely random and yet somehow they are serious.

  11. #311
    I'm still here darlings. We on the lotto forum get a kick out of TashaNathanKarenKariceDonathanEtc in all her various disguises and have our own fun with her. Mr.V has his fans there as well. Had I known the sock queen herself was missing me, I would have posted more. Here's a little something to tide you over Tash.

    -----

    Axl sauntered in to the 24-hour CVS and grabbed a hand cart from the floor. His favorite employee Karen had been derelict in her hand cart stacking duties. This one had soiled diaper in it, toddler size he estimated, but he didn't mind. He carfully folded it and sealed it with the tabs and tucked it into his backpack. This might come in handy later, he mused, like Checkov's gun, except a diaper instead of a gun.

    He espied an old lady perusing the greeting card section and, with full knowledge that she was not an employee, asked her where the genital wart cream aisle was and if she was the staff nurse who would help him apply it. The old lady farted and scooted away before breaking into a full run out of the aisle. The scent she left behind was classic old lady toot with a hint of stale perfume. Delicious, Axl thought. But back to the matter at hand: Where was Karen?

    Axl walked the aisles slowly, putting items in his cart randomly, only to take them out in another aisle and reshelf them randomly where they clearly did not belong. A box of condoms hanging with on the same hook as crayons, a box of kleenex stacked with the breakfast cereals, and his magnum opus, a jug of bleach tucked in the refrigerator case behind the 3 liter Cokes. That'll give Karen something to do, he mused.

    Suddenly he heard a fart behind him. He smelled her signature scent before he saw his prey: Karen.

    "You miss me fatso?" she crooned in a gravelly baritone.

    "When do you get off work?" Axl responded plaintively. He tossed his backpack off and was already taking his pants off.

    "Nunya fat lesbian business." Karen said

    By now, all 3.6 inches of Axl's manhood was as hard as it would ever be. He waived a $10 bill in the air. "I'll drive you to the slots afterwards, what do you say?" Axl asked, trying to sweeten the deal.

    Just as Karen was about to respond, the old lady from the greeting card aisle showed up. Her face was red with rage. In her left hand was a red helium balloon and in her right was an open face soiled toddler sized diaper. Axl's heart froze. He glanced at in the direction of where he had tossed his backpack and saw that it was open and its contents scattered over the aisle.

    "Open wide fatso!" the old lady screamed.

  12. #312
    Karen yawned theatrically and said "Back off, bitch, the money is mine !"

    The feisty octogenarian would take no sass from a lowly, piece of shit Walgreens drone; "I don't care if he does have genital warts; hell, I have them too."

    With that she shoved Karen into the Lume crotch deodorant display (apt) and with her rival out of the way she looked lovingly into Axl's eyes and remembering how sex wasn't really THAT bad, and needing ten bucks, she swallowed and said "Do me. But hang on, I need to pick the scabs first and let them run."

    Karen climbed out of the fallen display and lumbered toward the gray haired vixen, saying "He's mine."

    Flattered yet flatulant, Axl passed gas to the tune of "Yankee Doodle Dandy" and then thanked himself and gave himself a quick golf clap.

    The women squared off; soon they were pulling each other's hair, biting, scratching and slapping each other silly.

    Axl wandered off to look at the Oreos; while Karen was distracted he slipped a couple packages down the front of his pants.

    Soon a blanket of quiet descended; Axl wandered back and saw the old lady was laid out in aisle three, knocked out cold, and he noted that Karen was huffing and puffing like a steam engine.

    "Well, I beat her ass, so now let's fuck and then you can take me to the casino and give me that ten bucks, like you promised."

    They did, he did, and they lived miserably ever after.
    Last edited by MisterV; 02-14-2023 at 07:10 PM.
    What, Me Worry?

  13. #313
    Karen and Axl were sitting in the waiting room of the fertility clinic waiting to hear the results of Axl's sperm count test. Last month the doc had said that due to Axl's age, lesbian appearance, and promiscuous homosexual lifestyle and prior to marrying Karen, his balls no longer produced enough swimmers to knock up the woman he'd settled for in his twilight years. A nurse beckoned them to the examination room.

    "I'm afraid your only option is sperm donation. Do you know anyone dumb enough to let you two imbeciles raise their biological progeny?" Dr. Fiddycent asked.

    Karen and Axl yelled in unison, "Billy!"

    The drove to the halfway house where Billy was staying after being released from prison for arson. Billy gave them a sample, chatted for a while, shook hands, and gave Axl a blow job for old time's sake before they all said their good-byes. Next, Axl and Karen headed to the dollar mart to get a cheap turkey baster. They sneaked into the stock room and did what Dr. Fiddycent had instructed them to do with the goo and the turkey baster.

    "Let's go to the liquor store to celebrate," suggested Karen.

    "But babe, we don't want the baby to come out all retarded and stuff," Axl reminded her. "I'll drink for both of us and you get yourself some lotto tickets."

    Karen bought $165 worth of Mega Millions and a $50 scratcher. Later that night, she watched the drawing while snuggled up to Axl. To her shock and amazement, she had the winning ticket. She promptly spent it all at Chinook Passing Wind Casino and the Indians shooked her hand and thanked her for her generous contribution to the tribal coffers.

    Nine months later Karen shat out her and Billy's son, whom Axl, Karen, and Billy named Nathan, after nobody in particular and certainly not after that Nathan.

    "I've been thinking, and I really don't want to be a mother," Karen told Axl the morning after becoming a mother. "Ima let you and Billy have this one. You deserve it. Yours is a love story for the ages and you two are soul mates. I think I want to become a writer and this baby will just hold me back." And with that, she let out a hot post-partum fart and got on the next bus, never to be seen again.

  14. #314
    They were having fun at the bar, but still the lingering doubts and uncertainty about Billy's house being accidentally burned down and what would happen if Billy was found to be the culprit. Although the cause of the fire was investigated to be bad electrical wiring, they all knew there was a chance Billy could still be caught. They also had no home to sleep in anymore. They were fuced if it was revealed that Billy accidentally caused the fire. They also had no home to go back to. They were fuced. After the bar, they went to the hotel.



    Axl thanked God he had digitally stored all the Contracts and they weren't just paper Contracts. Cream Rose was grateful too.



    Billy snuggled to Axl asking him to comfort him. He felt traumatized. Axl obliged him and comforted him, knowing that Billy needed his comfort and support.



    Axl caressed Billy's hair and said,"Where do we go? Where do we go? Where do we go now?" Billy smiled a little, through his traumatization. He was grateful he had Axl who loved him. Cream Rose also comforted Billy.Billy was also glad he had Andy, Mike, James and Jimmy who also loved him. Billy fell asleep.



    Cream Rose wondered what they would do. Billy was sure to become in big trouble with the law if the pizza was found to be the real cause of the fire, not bad electrical wiring.



    On the news, there was movie theater surveillance that showed that Billy, in fact, showed up later to the movie theater than the rest of Cream Rose, like HOURS later. Billy no longer had an airtight alibi, although the rest of Cream Rose did.



    No! Jimmy, Axl, Andy, Mike, and James cried in unison again. Billy was sure to be the number one Suspect with this new public info. They woke up Billy and told him the bad news.



    No! Billy cried horrified. Billy said,"You guys will still protect me, right? Cream Rose looked at each other uneasily, but they knew they had promised to protect Billy. Billy would have protected either one of them if any of them were in Billy's position.



    There was a Star Wars Convection going on and Axl, wearing a disguise and makeup that covered all of his tattoos bought 6 Darth Vader Costumes. His plan was to disguise himself and Cream Rose as Darth Vader, hiding Billy from the Authorities. He told them to all meet him at a secluded place and they agreed. At the secluded place, he gave all of them the Darth Vader Costumes and they went to the Star Wars Convection as Darth Vader. Problem was, LOTS of other People were also Darth Vader, not surprisingly. They decided to stay close to each other in order to not get separated. This was when Cream Rose's penchant for being really close to each other came in handy.



    They were entertained at the Star Wars Convection , looking like any other Darth Vader Fan. The Convection was over later and the 6 of them were able to walk into a Walgreens and put money on reloadable gift cards, and not look out of place due to the Star Wars Convection. They soon left. There were more Darth Vader Fans close by.



    Cream Rose actually made a plan to send Billy on the run, and Billy agreed. Cream Rose said their goodbyes to Billy, and he said them back, and Billy went to the crowd of other Darth Vader Fans and soon ran off into the night, undetected. Axl, Jimmy, James, Andy and Mike were glad Billy was able to get away.



    The news later that night pointed out that Billy was officially on the run and was a Fugitive.



    Axl's phone rang and "Unknown Caller," popped up on his Cellphone. Axl knew who it was.



    He answered. Billy said," I love you, Axl. Axl smiled and repeated it back. Billy and Axl made kissing noises over the phone, the implication clear. Billy said,"I'm at a payphone, I gotta run."



    Axl told him, "I understand."



    They quickly both hung up.



    Cream Rose couldn't believe that Billy was a Fugitive on the run. Technically, this was worse than when Axl was a Fugitive on the run since they all knew where Axl was and Axl was being hidden at Billy's house, which was now burned down. Oh, the bittersweet memories.
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/Zk2WAFzDcrJ7pjNB7

    Take comfort in the fact that no one is actually backing up his wishes to have you permanantly banned.


    Smart is knowing a Tomato is a fruit.

    Wise is knowing a Tomato doesn't belong in a fruit salad.



    I am glad to get my full posting rights back! Thank you Dan!

  15. #315
    Axl's phone rang again: it was Billy.

    "Just wondering if you've spotted him yet?"

    Perplexed, Axl asked: "Spotted WHO, exactly?"

    "Why, the one-armed man, of course."

    "Uh, what One-armed man?"

    "Don't play cute with me, lover boy, you know, the guy I told you about. Remember me telling you about that strange dream I had? In it, some guy broke in disguised as an erection; he was wearing a disguise: it looked like the same penis costume they sell at Walgreens. I saw him leaving the house with a gas can. He caused the fire and I have to find him. Until I do,I am THE FUGITIVE."

    "Uh-oh" mused Axl: "Life is imitating art."

    "Axl, I need to get into my detective disguise; please go into my closet and find my vagina costume; you know, the one I wear when I feel frisky, and leave it in the woods and I'll pick it up and start sleuthing. I'll find that one-armed prick if it's the last thing I do."

    Axl agreed to find and lay out the pussy costume; Billy thanked him and Axl welcomed him.

    "Say, while you're on the phone, can we sext?"

    Axl agreed; he knew how much Billy loved it when Axl sucked his cock (Billy lovingly nick-named Axl his 'Lolli-pop man').

    Axl couldn't suck off Billy remotely; this surprised him as they both had the latest i-phone and he thought that app was available.

    Frustrated, Axl went to the fridge, got a cucumber and put it in his mouth, in and out, while Billy moaned and touched himself.

    Axl got into it; he felt he had a particular knack for giving deep throat, at least that's what his father had always told him.

    Alas, he stuck the cuke too far down his throat, causing it to get stuck and block his airway.

    "Oh, shit" was his last thought before passing out.
    Last edited by MisterV; 02-15-2023 at 11:53 AM.
    What, Me Worry?

  16. #316
    Axl went to bed after hanging out with Cream Rose.



    Axl sighed unhappily, looking at where Billy would have been sleeping next to him had he not been on the run. Axl fell asleep, unhappily.



    The next day, Jimmy, James, Andy Mike came to Axl's room to support him.



    "I lost my house and my Boyfriend all within a couple of days," Axl lamented softly. Jimmy, James Andy and Mike all comforted Axl.



    They all had no idea where Billy was since Billy turned off the Location on his phone.



    Axl drank Coca Cola again excessively, and Jimmy, James, Andy and Mike knew Axl drank Coca Cola excessively when he was feeling stressed out and troubled.



    "I hope Billy's okay," Axl said.



    Axl's phone rang and it was W Rose.



    W asked him,"How are you coping?"



    Axl replied,"My Boyfriend's on the run and my house has been burned down, I'm not doing so well!"



    W replied, "I'm sure Billy's fine. And insurance can give a huge payout for the burned down house."



    Axl said,"Billy's the number one Suspect. Insurance probably won't pay out due to him being the number one Suspect.



    W asked,"How did the fire happen?"



    Axl was conflicted. He had promised Billy he wouldn't tell anyone how the fire really started.W was his Older Self, but they were technically two different People, so him telling W how the fire really started would still be breaking his promise to Billy.



    Axl responded,"I plead the fifth,"



    W was like,"Come on, we're closely related. You can trust me with how the fire really started."



    Axl responded,"I plead the fifth," again.



    W said,"Did Billy start the fire?" Axl's stomach churned into knots.



    He repeated,"I plead the fifth." He couldn't betray Billy, even to tell his Older Self that yes, Billy did start the fire.



    W said ,"So Billy did start the fire?"



    Axl responded,"I didn't say that. I said,"I plead the fifth!"



    W answered,"You sure are defending Billy like a true Lawyer!"



    Axl almost replied," I promised Billy I would protect him!" But caught himself just in time. He responded,"I plead the fifth."



    W was like,"Okay. It's clear you don't want to directly say if Billy started the fire."



    They chatted for a while and then said their goodbyes and hung up.



    On the news, there was even more investigation, and it was determined that there was a pizza left unintended in an oven in Billy's house. The pizza and the oven were filmed. The burned out pizza was listed as the official cause of the fire. The pizza was dusted for fingerprints.



    Cream Rose knew that the official cause of fire had a real possibility of being found out. And it happened. Billy would have been screwed had he not gone on the run.



    There was a knock on Axl's Hotel Room and Police wanted to interrogate Cream Rose on Billy's whereabouts. Axl and Cream Rose all got ready. They put on bulletproof vests and motorcycle helmets.



    Police took them to the Local Police Station and interrogated them. They would have interrogated them separately, but since Axl was their Lawyer, they all had to interrogate them together. Cream Rose were relieved they would all be interrogated together and not separately.



    The Police asked them if they helped Billy go on the run. Axl responded,"Tell them you guys plead the fifth. It's your right." James, Jimmy, Andy and Mike said,"I plead the fifth." Axl also said,"I plead the fifth."



    The Police asked them if Billy started the fire. Axl, Jimmy, James Andy and Mike all said," I plead the fifth."



    The Police asked,"Did you guys have any knowledge of the fire happening when it was happening?"



    Cream Rose all responded,"I plead the fifth."



    The Police asked,"Did any of you make the random call that led Firefighters to Billy's burning house?"



    Cream Rose all responded, "I plead the fifth."



    Police asked,"Why did Billy show up to the movie theaters hours after you guys?"



    Cream Rose responded,"I plead the fifth."





    The Police were exasperated and said,"If you guys don't respond with REAL answers, you 5 are all going to jail today!"



    Axl responded,"My Clients and I don't HAVE to answer any of these questions with anything other than the pleading the fifth Amendment which is a right to not say anything to incriminate ourselves. Cream Rose all smirked.



    The Police said exasperated,"Go home."



    Cream Rose all smirked and left.



    Soon, the Interrogation of Cream Rose went viral. Fans laughed at basically every answer being,"I plead the fifth!" And Axl's final answer being about the fifth Amendment meaning.



    Cream Rose went to Denny's and Fans wanted to know where Billy was.



    "We plead the fifth!" They all answered in Unison. Fans loved this. But really, they really didn't know where Billy was. They were asked for Autographs and Selfies and obliged their Fans. The Fans were happy. They went back to their own tables and Cream Rose had a nice meal and paid and left. They all went back to the hotel.
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/Zk2WAFzDcrJ7pjNB7

    Take comfort in the fact that no one is actually backing up his wishes to have you permanantly banned.


    Smart is knowing a Tomato is a fruit.

    Wise is knowing a Tomato doesn't belong in a fruit salad.



    I am glad to get my full posting rights back! Thank you Dan!

  17. #317
    There was a knock on Cream Rose's hotel door.

    "Who is it?"

    "Room service."

    Axl smiled, having ordered some lark's tongue in aspic from room service; he was surprised to see a huge, floppy, smelly vagina standing at the door.

    "It's me, Billy."

    Axl and Cream Rose smiled snd shook the cunt's hand.

    Billy climbed out of his costume, letting fly with a series of loud, noxious queefs as he did so.

    "You know, thinking it over, what the fuck am I doing hiding from the law? The fire was an accident, not intentional. There was no crime, no arson. Only an idiot would dream up such a scenario."

    With that they all agreed that Tasha was both an idiot and a shitty writer, that she had the imagination of a turnip and the writing skill of a retarded aardvark.

    "Fuck that no-talent bitch, let's burn some ants."

    Cream Rose cheered, got out their magnifying glasses and went outside to find some ants to burn.

    Life was good.
    Last edited by MisterV; 02-15-2023 at 12:45 PM.
    What, Me Worry?

  18. #318
    They went to sleep. They woke up the next day and ate and got ready for the day.



    They went to a bar. At Karaoke, Axl decided to sing,"Billy Don't Lose My Number," by Phil Collins. Cream Rose was on board with this

    Axl said,"I'd like to sing a Phil Collins song here at this bar!" The audience cheered for him.



    Axl emotionally sang





    They came at night leaving fear behind

    Shadows were on the ground

    Nobody knew where to find him

    No evidence was found

    I'm never coming back

    They heard him cry

    And I believe him

    Well he never meant to do anything wrong

    It's gonna get worse if he waits too long



    Billy, billy don't you lose my number

    Cos you're not anywhere

    That I can find you

    Oh now billy, billy don't you lose my number

    Cos you're not anywhere that I can find you, oh no



    Searching through the day and into the night

    They wouldn't stop till they found him

    They didn't know him and they didn't understand

    They never asked him why

    Get out of my way

    They heard him shout

    Then a blinding light

    Ooh all I could see was him running down the street

    Out of the shadows and into the night



    Now billy, billy don't you lose my number

    Cos you're not anywhere

    That I can find you, oh

    Now billy, billy don't you lose my number

    Cos you're not anywhere that I can find you, oh



    Don't give up

    Keep running, keep hiding

    Don't give up

    Billy, if you know you're right

    Don't give up

    You know that I am on your side

    Don't give up

    Oh billy, you better, you better, you better run for your life



    Now billy, billy don't you lose my number

    Cos you're not anywhere

    That I can find you, oh

    Now billy, billy don't you lose my number

    Cos you're not anywhere that I can find you, oh



    They came at night leaving fear behind

    Shadows were on the ground

    Nobody knew where to find him

    No evidence was found

    I'm never coming back

    They heard him cry

    And I believe him

    He never meant to do anything wrong

    It's gonna get worse if he waits too long



    Now billy, billy don't you lose my number

    Cos you're not anywhere

    That I can find you, oh

    Now billy, billy don't you lose my number

    Cos you're not anywhere that I can find you, oh."



    The audience filmed this performance. They cheered wildly. They were planning to make it viral. Axl got off the stage.



    Cream Rose were like,"Nice use of the song knowing it's about someone named Billy. They smiled. Axl smiled back. They hung out at the bar and then went back to the hotel.
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/Zk2WAFzDcrJ7pjNB7

    Take comfort in the fact that no one is actually backing up his wishes to have you permanantly banned.


    Smart is knowing a Tomato is a fruit.

    Wise is knowing a Tomato doesn't belong in a fruit salad.



    I am glad to get my full posting rights back! Thank you Dan!

  19. #319
    For the next few years, Axl and Billy basked in the glow of being new dads. Every time they went out and about on walks pushing little Nathan in his stroller, people assumed Axl was a lesbian grandma and Billy his adult son. Often Axl wondered if his ex wife Karen would write about his and Billy's child. I mean, having Axl and Billy become gay dads was a natural branching off point in her best-selling Cake Cream series. Last year, Karen had been in town for a book signing and had promised to meet her child for the first time since abandoning the family, but at the last minute had bailed. Now Karen's book series was being optioned by HBO and she was a gazillionaire. Suddenly it dawned on Axl: Karen owed them an assload of back child support payments.

    Axl called up his pal Judge V. "Hey V, I need to do a lawsuit. My deadbeat ex-wife owes me an assload of childsupport. Can you pencil me in for next week?"

    "That's not how legal processes work, Axl," Judge V. sighed. "Just hire a real lawyer and let them handle the filing." Axl heard a fart echoing in a toilet bowl on the other end of the line. Wow, Judge V. even takes my calls on the shitter, he thought, what a swell guy. Axl then got hard a the thought of farts. Then he shook himself out of his reverie. Nathan was happily chewing on a pinecone he had grabbed from someone's landscaping display. Axl thought about telling Billy his plan to get rich again, but decided to keep it a surprise. He would tell Billy there was a surprise birthday parter for Judge V. at the courthouse, but then reveal they were actually having a trial to sue Karen. He wondered if he should put an ad on Craigslist for jurors, or put up fliers at the local coffee shop. He decided call up Judge V. for advice.

    "Firstly, you imbecile," Judge V. barked. "this won't even go to a jury. Secondly, you fat lesbian fuck, juries are not selected by want ads."

    Axl thanked Judge V. for his advice, shook the phone as if it were Judge V.'s hand, and then farted loudly. Little Nathan was startled by the sound and began crying.

    "Aww, I'm sorry little guy. Here's a rock and sharp stick to distract you."

    Nathan gurgled in delight.

  20. #320
    The "Billy Don't You Lose My Number by Phil Collins at the bar went viral.



    Fans pointed out it was interesting that Axl chose to sing THAT song, a song where the main character is named Billy and goes on the run, just like a certain Cream Rose drummer also named Billy. Cream Rose blushed. That was the point. Axl used that song to directly reference Billy, his Boyfriend and Cream Rose's Brother.



    Axl's Cellphone rang again from an Unknown area code. Axl picked up the phone and Billy said,"Nice reference to me with that Billy Don't Lose My Number song," Billy was laughing.



    Axl laughed too "I'm glad you enjoyed it." Billy said he could chat with Axl longer than the last time. Axl smiled.



    Axl asked,"Where are you now?" Billy responded,"I'm in Tampa."



    Axl asked,"Are you okay? Are you eating and sleeping well?"



    Billy responded, "I'm okay. I bought a fake ID and disguises and am staying at a motel. I am eating okay and sleeping okay."



    Axl responded,"I'm really glad you're okay."



    Billy said,"Thank you." Axl welcomed him. They chatted for a long time. And Axl added,"Where do we go? Where do we go? Where do we go now? " Billy laughed. Soon, they kissed each other over the phone and then said their goodbyes and hung up.



    Axl soon went to sleep.



    The next day, Cream Rose woke up, ate and got ready for the day. Axl told Cream Rose about Billy's conversation with him last night. They were all relieved that Billy was okay.



    They decided to go to the mall and hang out. At the mall, Fans asked Cream Rose where they thought Billy might be.



    Axl said,"Billy's probably hiding in somewhere in Anchorage, Alaska!" Cream Rose backed up Axl.



    Fans were like,"Whoa, that's oddly specific!" Cream Rose were like," Anchorage, Alaska is probably a good place to hide when on the run! This was being filmed. The Fans asked Cream Rose for Selfies and Autographs and they all obliged. The Fans thanked them and were welcomed. The Fans left.



    They hung out more and sure enough, this impromptu interview went viral.



    Posters were like,"Did Billy call Cream Rose and tell them he ran to Anchorage? I mean, that's just REALLY specific that Cream Rose would say,"Anchorage!"



    Cream Rose all blushed. They all knew that Billy actually ran to Tampa.



    And.... The News said that there would be a search for Billy in Anchorage. The News failed to realize that Billy being in Anchorage was basically implausible with him being on the run. Anchorage was roughly a 9 hour flight away from Miami. Billy would have a hard time getting a plane ticket when he was on the run. Even with a disguise and a fake ID.



    Cream Rose went back to the hotel and ordered Room Service and ate, drank and chilled. Sure enough, on the News, there was Alaskan Authorities searching for Billy. Cream Rose looked at each other and all laughed. They couldn't believe that the Authorities fell for Axl's ruse! They knew Billy must have been laughing his ass off too at this!



    Billy called Axl. "Nice ruse to imply that I'm in Anchorage! " Billy was laughing. "These idiots actually are searching for me in Anchorage!"



    Axl said,"I wonder how many places in Anchorage they are searching !"



    Billy and Axl laughed. They chatted for a while and then said their goodbyes and hung up.



    Cream Rose watched some Cake Cream and Cream Rose videos with nostalgic looks on their faces. They were especially nostalgic at Billy playing the drums. They all missed Billy, but didn't want him behind bars. They were happy he was safe in Tampa.
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/Zk2WAFzDcrJ7pjNB7

    Take comfort in the fact that no one is actually backing up his wishes to have you permanantly banned.


    Smart is knowing a Tomato is a fruit.

    Wise is knowing a Tomato doesn't belong in a fruit salad.



    I am glad to get my full posting rights back! Thank you Dan!

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