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Thread: Young Axl Rose and Cake Cream in 2022! :D

  1. #41
    Billy shyly asked Axl if he wanted to sleep in Billy's bed. Axl said,,"Yes," with a big smile. Billy smiled too. They both climbed into Billy's bed. Billy lovingly massaged Axl's gunshot wounds, and Axl felt loved and comfortable. Then Billy kissed him on the mouth and Axl kissed him back. After kissing, Billy asked him,"Where do we go? Where do we go? Where do we go now?" And Axl smiled. They snuggled together and fell asleep.

    They woke up in the morning about 3 AM. They were still hiding their relationship from Cake Cream. Billy and Axl decided they wanted to go book a Hotel Room just them two. They packed their Suitcases, showered and dressed. Then they ordered a LYFT to the Local Marriott while the rest of Cake Cream were all asleep and left with the suitcases when their LYFT arrived. They went to the Local Marriott and booked a Hotel Room for just them two.

    They settled in and made out with wild abandon and passion. Axl and Billy had brought condoms, and lubricant with them and wanted to make love to each other. Axl put on the condom and lubed up Billy and entered Billy, face to face and made gentle love to him. They also kissed sensually while doing the gentle lovemaking. They both loved this. As Axl came, he held Billy's hand. Billy moaned with pleasure as this happened.

    The lovemaking was something they both wanted. After Axl in Billy lovemaking happened, Billy said he wanted to return the favor and Axl was up for this. Billy got a new condom and lubed up Axl and put the condom on him and entered Axl this time. They were face to face once again and Billy was also gentle with the lovemaking he did to and Billy and Axl did more sensual kissing. They loved the gentle lovemaking and sensual kissing. As Billy came, he held Axl's hand too and Axl also found himself moaning with pleasure. After the lovemaking, they showered, showering each other luxuriously and making out again. They finished showering, toweled off, and got dressed and went to sleep together.

    Axl woke up about 9 and saw he had missed calls from Andy, Mike, James, and Jimmy and the voicemails were basically asking him where the hell were Axl and Billy. Axl looked at Billy sleeping peacefully with a smile on his face and Axl smirked. He enjoyed the lovemaking he and Billy had done. Billy woke up a little while later and also saw he had missed calls from Andy,Mike,James, and Jimmy that had voicemails asking him where the hell were he and Axl. Billy and Axl looked at each other and smirked mischievously. Billy and Axl made out with each other again. After they made out, they ordered Room Service and ate and drank and got ready for the day.
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  2. #42
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    Little did they know that the fellow with room service was a paparazzi tipster: he knew who Axl was and when he saw the used condoms on the floor and the shit stains on the sheets he put two and two together and dropped a dime.

    A bit later Axl was shocked to have his picture taken as he walked hand in hand with his boyfriend out of the elevator; two hours later the pic was viral, with the headline "Axl is bent."

    Immediately his fellow band members jumped ship and hooked up with another singer; despondent, Axl went to a certain Tijuana bar where he let a donkey fuck him to death.
    What, Me Worry?

  3. #43
    They decided they should call Cake Cream and tell them they were okay. Cake Cream were their Friends and deserved to be told they were okay. Axl and Billy called each and every one of them and told them they were okay.

    James, Andy, and Mike all asked them why they were at the Local Marriott Hotel just them two. Axl and Billy asked them how they knew that and they reminded them they could trace their Locations using their Cellphones. Jimmy had already known their was something going on between Axl and Billy so he wasn't surprised.

    Andy pointed out he was Gay and had a feeling he knew why Axl and Billy had went to the local Marriott Hotel together without telling any of them. Axl and Billy blushed.

    Cake Cream told them they were glad they were okay and approved of whatever was going on between Axl and Billy.

    Axl and Billy admitted that they were dating.

    Cake Cream asked Axl and Billy when they were coming back home. Axl and Billy responded they'd be coming home the next day. Cake Cream were all relieved. Axl and Billy all chatted with their Cake Cream Bandmates and soon hung up and had fun that day. The next day, they checked out and used a LYFT to go back home. At home, they unpacked and Cake Cream all looked at them intently.

    Axl and Billy blushed.

    James asked,"Why did you pull that stunt? You could have just told us you guys were dating. We found out anyways.

    Axl and Billy admitted they thought they'd be judged by Cake Cream if they told them they were dating. Andy pointed out that he was Gay and no one judged him.

    Jimmy said,"You guys could have at least told me."

    Axl and Billy looked at the ground.

    Mike said, "We should all be more open with each other." Axl and Cake Cream agreed to be more open with each other.

    Axl and Billy asked Cake Cream if Claven Records would still allow Axl to be their Manager considering the fact that Billy and he were Boyfriends.

    Cake Cream replied they would keep Billy and Axl's relationship a secret just in case Axl wasn't allowed to date Billy. Billy and Axl thanked Cake Cream and were welcomed.
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/Zk2WAFzDcrJ7pjNB7

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  4. #44
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    "I'll show you how to be more open" yelled Axl as he disemboweled his band mates with his trusty cub scout knife.

    "Oh Axl, you made SUCH a mess" simpered Billy.

    Axl disemboweled Billy, then got down on the blood covered floor and made 'snow angels" before dousing everything with gasoline and tossing a lit match as he walked out the door.
    What, Me Worry?

  5. #45
    Claven Records called Axl's Cellphone and straight up asked Axl if he and Billy were dating. Axl said,"No, Billy and I aren't dating. We're just Friends and Manager/Clients.

    "You promise? Claven Records asked.

    Axl had a look of turmoil on his face. "I plead the fifth Amendment." Axl replied.

    Claven Records asked if Axl and Billy wanted to come to Claven Records and "discuss," an important thing with them. Axl knew this was about he and Billy's relationship. Axl told Claven Records to hold on and they did. He explained the situation to Billy. Billy also felt the "discussion," would be about their Relationship. And was willing to go to Claven Records and "discuss," their Relationship.

    Axl and Billy made out and then Axl went back to Claven Records phone call and told them that he and Billy were willing to come to Claven Records and discuss the important thing. Claven Records and they made plans to discuss the important thing. Axl and Claven Records chatted a bit and then both said goodbye and hung up.

    Axl and Billy held hands and discussed the important thing Claven Records wanted to talk to them about to the rest of Cake Cream.

    Cake Cream said,"We should all go to Claven Records. We should be supporting Axl and Billy in front of Claven Records." Everybody agreed.

    They all ate and got ready to go to Claven Records. They left and went to Claven Records.

    At Claven Records, they were all in Timothy's office and Timothy asked Billy and Axl if they were dating. Axl and Billy held hands right in front of Timothy to non verbally tell him that they were dating. Timothy was like," Okay, got it. You guys are dating."

    Billy and Axl nodded.

    Jimmy straight up said,"Axl's the best Manager we've ever had. He's also our Friend. We love Axl. Please don't fire him as our Manager. Please don't fire Billy from Cake Cream. Billy's the best Drummer we've ever had. Billy's also our Friend. We love Billy too." "All of Cake Cream basically said the same thing. Axl and Billy smiled happily and everyone smiled back at them.

    Timothy was amused. "We're not going to fire Axl as your Manager. Nor are we going to fire Billy. It's only Claven Records Staff who can't date each other or their Clients, for example, I wouldn't be able to date any of you guys nor can I date Patrick Gordon, one of my Co Managers. But Axl dating Billy is allowed.

    All of Cake Cream and Axl breathed sighs of relief. Everybody thanked Timothy and Timothy welcomed them. They all chatted and soon left and went back home.
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/Zk2WAFzDcrJ7pjNB7

    Take comfort in the fact that no one is actually backing up his wishes to have you permanantly banned.


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  6. #46
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    Enroute to their love nest in their custom penis-themed car (a remodel of the former Oscar Meyer mobile) Billy batted his lashes and told Axl "Last night I was so drunk I blew Chunks."

    Axl, not unfamiliar with alcohol, merely smiled, and said "well, that's not unusual."

    Blushing, Billy said "But darling, you don't understand: Chunks is my neighbor's dog."
    What, Me Worry?

  7. #47
    At home, they relaxed and watched TV. Billy had his head in Axl's lap while Axl lovingly caressed Billy's hair. Both Billy and Axl were smiling. Jimmy, James, Andy and Mike thought Billy and Axl made a cute and good couple. Soon, Billy fell asleep. Axl, Jimmy, Mike, Andy, and James chatted while watching TV. Soon, Jimmy, James, and Mike went to their rooms.

    Axl asked Andy,"Andy, Billy is my first and only Boyfriend. Since you date Guys, any advice for me and Billy?"

    Andy replied, "Be open with each other. Be attentive to each other's needs and wants. Be loyal to each other."

    Axl asked,"Is there any special things Billy likes?"

    Andy replied,"Billy loves Kit Kats. If you buy him Kit Kats, he'll love you even more. Billy loves getting his hair caressed as you've already figured.

    Axl looked at Andy deeply. Have you and Billy ever dated?"

    Andy answered shyly,"No, we're just Friends. Billy had a boyfriend before you, but that Boyfriend wasn't me. Nor has Billy ever dated any Cake Cream Member. All five of us have a close Brotherly type of Friendship."

    Andy and Axl chatted for a long while watching TV.

    Andy said,"You and Billy are such a good couple. He was smiling.

    Axl blushed deeply and thanked him and was welcomed.

    Billy woke up a little while later and Billy, Andy, and Axl all continued watching TV. Billy and Axl gave each other loving states. Axl and Billy were happy they found true love with each other.
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/Zk2WAFzDcrJ7pjNB7

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  8. #48
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    "Billy," queried Axl, "What are these small creatures in my pubic hair, and these red lines on my wrist? They itch like crazy."

    "Let me see...oh, that. It's nothing, just crabs and scabies."

    "Huh? You just gave me crabs and scabies?"

    Billy shook his head and smiling said "I am SUCH a naughty boy, Axl, I think you need to punish me."

    Scratching madly, Axl picked up a table lamp and smashed it on Billy's skull.

    "And to think I was falling in love with you,,,"
    What, Me Worry?

  9. #49
    Andy went to bed. Axl and Billy watched some more TV. Axl decided to surprise Billy and bought 10 Jumbo bags of Kit Kats for Billy from Instacart. He smiled at Billy.

    A little while later, the Jumbo bags of Kit Kats arrived.

    Axl got the Kit Kat bags and gave them to Billy. "A little birdie told me you loved these," he said to Billy rakishly. Billy's eyes shone with happiness. "Thank you, Axl!" Billy said gratefully.



    Axl welcomed him. Billy offered Axl some Kit Kats and Axl graciously accepted. They ate some Kit Kats, giggling and watching some more TV.

    After watching TV, they felt tired. Billy asked,"Your bedroom or mine?" He was rakishly smiling at Axl

    "Your bedroom," Axl replied, also smiling rakishly.

    They got ready for bed and then climbed into Billy's bed. Billy and Axl snuggled close to each other. Billy caressed Axl's hair this time and Axl was relaxed and smiling. He loved Billy caressing his hair. Axl brought Billy even closer to him and kissed him on the mouth. Billy kissed him back. They soon fell asleep.

    They woke up the next morning and ate and got ready for the day.

    Cake Cream and Axl went to the mall and did some shopping. They were wearing bulletproof proof vests and motorcycle helmets. Fans of them asked Billy and Axl if they were Lovers. Billy and Axl both said,"No." Cake Cream also said that Billy and Axl weren't Lovers.

    The Fans smirked skeptically. They pointed out that Billy and Axl were standing REALLY close to each other at the latest Cake Cream Show.

    Axl pointed out," Just because we were standing REALLY close to each other doesn't mean that we are dating."

    Billy looked at the ground and said,"Axl and I are just Manager/Clients/Mentor/Protege/Friends. We're not dating."

    Cake Cream backed them up. The Fans and they chatted awkwardly and then the Fans left and they continued hanging out in the mall. They decided to go to a Supermarket and buy some food. In the Supermarket, Secret Lovers by Atlantic Starr played and Billy and Axl stared at each other knowingly and blushed. A Fan, unbeknownst to them, filmed this. Cake Cream and Axl finished shopping and went home. They turned on YouTube and the "Secret Lovers," and Billy and Axl's reactions to each other already went viral.

    "No!" Cake Cream and Axl all screamed together in horror. Billy begun to cry. He said,"My Parents are most likely going to see this video and question my sexuality!" Axl found himself comforting Billy, hugging him and wiping away his tears again. Billy hugged him back.

    "Come on, it'll be alright," Axl told him soothingly. He caressed Billy's hair and Billy fell asleep again.

    Jimmy, James, Mike, and Andy pointed out how at ease and in love with Axl Billy was. Axl smiled shyly.

    Axl asked Cake Cream,"Should Billy and I come out of the closet publicly?

    Jimmy answered,"Hmm. A lot of our Fans are Gay. You and he can be an Ally for them. They'd accept and support that you and Billy are dating since they date the same sex themselves."

    Andy said,"I'm not so sure that Axl and Billy should come out publicly. I'm gay and I still haven't come out publicly."

    Billy and Axl blushed shyly at Andy's advice.

    James said,"Maybe you and Billy can leave a subtle hint about your relationship, such as claiming you and he are close Friends, whereas you see me, Jimmy, Mike, and Andy as Brothers."

    Axl smiled and thought James's idea had a valid and logical point.
    Last edited by Tasha; 12-07-2022 at 01:15 AM.
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/Zk2WAFzDcrJ7pjNB7

    Take comfort in the fact that no one is actually backing up his wishes to have you permanantly banned.


    Smart is knowing a Tomato is a fruit.

    Wise is knowing a Tomato doesn't belong in a fruit salad.



    I am glad to get my full posting rights back! Thank you Dan!

  10. #50
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    Kentry was sweating like a pig: his eight hour shift at the slaughterhouse had just come to a close and the heat was oppressive.

    Scanning FB he saw the video of Axl and Billy canoodling in public: the blood ran to his head.

    "WTF? Axl is gay?"

    For reasons unclear this news really, really pissed him off and he dwelled over it on the ride home.

    "And to think I spent years listening to that fruit's music: I was betrayed."

    Seething, he decided something had to be done: he made an online reservation with American Airlines to fly to Axl's home town and packed his bags.

    Kentry was determined to set things right...
    What, Me Worry?

  11. #51
    They all chatted and went on Social Media. Fans of Guns N'Roses were pointing out that Guns N'Roses hadn't had a new Album in 14 years. They were clamoring for a new Album. Axl's gears turned in his head and he wondered if he could impersonate Older Axl and make a New Album. After all, he was still Axl Rose, just the Younger one. He told Cake Cream his idea and Jimmy said," It sounds like an interesting idea, but couldn't Older Axl sue you for Identity Theft for Impersonating him?"

    Axl responded," It would be awkward if Older Axl sued me for Identity Theft for Impersonating him since we are both Axl Rose," Axl said laughing.

    Axl continued, "And besides, it's been way too long since Chinese Democracy. Fans want a new album and I can make it happen."

    Billy woke up a little later and Axl and the rest of Cake Cream filled him in on Axl's plan.

    Billy agreed that it was time for a new Guns N'Roses Album. But he pointed out that Older Axl might not be okay with Axl impersonating him.

    Axl thought and thought. He came up with a new plan.

    He said,"You know what? Why don't I just write a new Album for Guns N'Roses and talk Older Axl and the rest of Current Guns N'Roses into recording it?"

    All of Cake Cream agreed that this plan was better than Axl straight up impersonating Older Axl.

    Axl smiled and wrote a whole new Album for Guns N'Roses and called it," Time For A New Era!" And Cake Cream thought the lyrics looked really good. Axl smiled and called Older Axl.

    Older Axl picked up the phone and Axl said,"Axl, Fans have been complaining that there hasn't been a new Guns N'Roses album in 14 years. They want a new one.

    Older Axl replied,"We're doing fine as a nostalgia act. Fans love the nostalgia act we do constantly."

    Axl responded,"Come on, it's time for a new era!"

    Older Axl picked up quickly. "Axl, do you have something up your sleeve?" He asked, curious.

    Axl responded,"Yes, I do. I already wrote a new album and called it,"Time For A New Era!" I wrote it for you and the rest of Current Guns N'Roses. All you guys have to do is record it. Fans will love it."

    "This means a lot to you, doesn't it," Older Axl said thoughtfully.

    "Yes, it does, " Axl responded, smiling.

    Older Axl replied,"Okay, I'll talk to the rest of Current Guns N'Roses about recording it."

    Axl smiled and thanked him. They chatted a little while and then both hung up.

    Cake Cream and Axl also chatted and then Older Axl called Axl and told him that Current Guns N'Roses was interested in recording Time For A New Era!" Album. Axl and Older Axl made plans for tomorrow to record Time For A New Era!"

    Cake Cream and Axl chilled until the next day


    The next day, Older Axl and Current Guns N'Roses came to Billy's house, they all chatted, and Current Guns N'Roses read Time For A New Era! Lyrics and loved it. Axl had them record Time For A New Era! Into a cassette and they all had plans to give this to Claven Records later that day.

    Later that day, they gave Time For A New Era! To Claven Records and Claven Records loved it.

    Claven Records offered 50 Million plus Royalties for Time For A New Era! And Current Guns N'Roses and Older Axl wanted this offer. Contracts were drawn, understood, and accepted. Both Axls signed,"W. Axl Rose," which amused Claven Records. The rest of Current Guns N'Roses also signed. Time For A New Era!" Was put on iTunes and it was a big hit! Fans of Current Guns N'Roses loved it! Cake Cream, both Axls, and Current Guns N'Roses were ecstatic and Claven Records were ecstatic too. They all chatted happily and then Current Guns N'Roses, Cake Cream, and both Axls left Claven Records.
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/Zk2WAFzDcrJ7pjNB7

    Take comfort in the fact that no one is actually backing up his wishes to have you permanantly banned.


    Smart is knowing a Tomato is a fruit.

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    I am glad to get my full posting rights back! Thank you Dan!

  12. #52
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    Kentry was stunned: never in his life did he expect to see TWO Axl's together, talking: WTF?

    "Whoa," he muttered, as he peered through a window, "What kind of freak show is this?"

    The next moment floored him: Axl took Axl in his arms and kissed him.

    "Jesus H. Christ!" thought Kentry, "Instead of killing Axl I think I'll film and YouTube this shit..." which he did.

    The clip, titled "Double Axl" got over a billion views in a day and made Kentry a lot of money; it also triggered an investigation by NSA as to how there could possibly be two Axl's running around.

    The end result was that time travel as we now know it was perfected, and Kentry finally had enough money to fix his meth-mouth.
    Last edited by MisterV; 12-08-2022 at 12:29 PM.
    What, Me Worry?

  13. #53
    Axl mused about how rich he was in 2022. He got Royalties for writing All The Sweet Filling, Tasty Cake, Tasty Cake Reloaded, and Time For A New Era! He also got a little from the Demo and some money for Cake Cream live concerts and got some money for the NBC Grammy Interview, and still had a couple of Millions left from Older Axl's gift to him. Axl was very wealthy, certainly a lot wealthier than he was in 1987. Both Axls were very wealthy in fact.

    Axl decided to tell Cake Cream to always pay their taxes. In fact, he decided that they should file their taxes tomorrow. Cake Cream agreed.

    They chilled until the next day and woke up, showered, got ready for the day and ate.

    Axl and Cake Cream went to a Tax Preparer and they filed their taxes. Axl's net worth was about 150 million! Much more than the under $20,000 he had before Cake Cream became huge Superstars. He smiled. Cake Cream were also worth about 100 Million each. Axl was worth about 50 Million more due to the fact that he wrote all of Cake Cream's songs besides their Demo, which was comprised of songs they had written before they even met Young Axl. After filling taxes, they went home and ate. They watched TV, and there was a Segment on MTV of Current Guns N'Roses performing Time For A New Era! They were really good and Fans of Current Guns N'Roses were really enjoying the show.

    Axl was proud of Current Guns N'Roses performing Time For A New Era! So good and told Cake Cream,"They look and sound great performing Time For A New Era!" He was smiling. Cake Cream also smiled and agreed.

    Axl's stomach rumbled with a little bit of want however. He had feelings of wanting to be on stage performing Time For A New Era!" Himself.

    He told Cake Cream his feelings and they pointed out that his older self was still performing so technically, he was performing. Axl smiled wryly. "But I want to be up on stage, performing Time For A New Era. "

    Cake Cream acknowledged that Axl was a performer and of course he'd want to be on stage performing.

    Billy, Jimmy, James, Andy and Mike chatted with each other in secret on how to help Axl. They decided that maybe Older Axl should be called and asked if Younger Axl could perform with them Time For A New Era! At their next show. Billy called Older Axl

    Older Axl asked Billy how he and Axl's relationship was and Billy replied that their relationship was good. Older Axl was happy.

    Billy asked, "Axl, how do you feel about Younger Axl performing Time For A New Era!" With you guys tomorrow?"

    Older Axl replied,"Does he want to perform tomorrow with us?"

    Billy responded,"He does."

    Older Axl replied, "Okay, that's fine. Tell him we'll be fine with him performing Time For A New Era! With us tomorrow."

    Billy smiled and thanked Older Axl and was welcomed. They chatted a little while longer and then both hung up.

    Billy told Cake Cream the good news and then they all told Axl the good news. Axl was ecstatic.
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/Zk2WAFzDcrJ7pjNB7

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  14. #54
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    Billy was soon ecstatic, as Axl gummed his throbbing member: it was like a pogo-stick in his mouth.

    Afterwards, Billy said he'd like to order in some Chinese food.

    Axl demurred, saying "I just ate my fill of Cream of Sum Yung Guy."

    They both chuckled and then popped a few fentanyl pills to help them get through the rest of the day.
    What, Me Worry?

  15. #55
    Cake Cream and Axl chilled until the next day.

    The next day, they got ready for the Current Guns N'Roses Show and then went. At the Venue, Current Guns N'Roses and Axl practiced. Everybody was wearing bulletproof vests and motorcycle helmets. It was soon time for the show. The Show was being done behind bulletproof plexiglass barriers.

    Current Guns N'Roses and Axl performed Time For A New Era! Axl was happy to be on stage performing with Older Axl and the rest of Current Guns N'Roses. The Fans and Cake Cream oved Axl and Older Axl harmonizing with each other, Axl singing like his 80's self and Older Axl singing like his 2022 self.

    They sounded good harmonizing with each other and the rest of Current Guns N'Roses also sounded good playing their instruments. Older Axl and Axl even danced wildly and energetically and Fans and Cake Cream loved this too. As the Show came to an end, the applause was deafening. Fans and Cake Cream loved it.

    At the final sendoff, Axl, Older Axl, and Current Guns N'Roses all did a bow and the applause was even more deafening. After the Show, they all went out to a fancy Restaurant where there were no Fans there and were able to eat in complete peace. They had fun at the Restaurant and paid and left.

    Cake Cream and Axl went home and showered and slept. The next day, they saw that last night's Time For A New Era! Already went viral. Fans loved it.

    Axl and Cake Cream smiled happily at each other.

    A Fan of Cake Cream, Older Axl, Axl, and Current Guns N'Roses wondered if Cake Cream, Axl, Older Axl and Current Guns N'Roses should perform Time For A New Era at Current Guns N'Roses next Show.

    Cake Cream and Axl looked at each other thoughtfully and all admitted that that would be an interesting Show. They could call it Cake, Guns, Roses. They chatted more about this possibility and were actually excited.

    They decided to call Older Axl and talk about this. Older Axl was onboard for this and the next day, they got ready for the Current Guns N'Roses Show and practiced at the Venue. They all had motorcycle helmets and bulletproof vests.

    When the Show started, Cake, Guns, Roses performed Time For A New Era! Behind bulletproof plexiglass barriers. Mike, Axl, and Older Axl sang together, Andy, Melissa, and Dizzy played Keyboard, Slash, Duff, Jimmy, Richard, and James played Guitar, Frank and Billy played the Drums.

    They all sounded really good and Fans loved this. Axl and Older Axl once again danced energetically and wildly and Fans loved this again. The Show was phenomenal and the Crowd went wild as Jimmy, James, Billy, Andy, Mike, Axl, Older Axl, Melissa, Frank, Richard, Dizzy, Slash, Duff did the final sendoff. The show was then over.
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/Zk2WAFzDcrJ7pjNB7

    Take comfort in the fact that no one is actually backing up his wishes to have you permanantly banned.


    Smart is knowing a Tomato is a fruit.

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    I am glad to get my full posting rights back! Thank you Dan!

  16. #56
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    Axl was surprised to get a visit from DONALD TRUMP backstage after the show.

    "I was wondering..." Trump said, "whether or not you'd be willing to join me as Vice President on my ticket as I run for re-election."

    Axl stopped fondling himself, frowned, and asked "Why me?"

    "You've got the Young People's Vote, that's why."

    "But...why not Ye?"

    "Ye is a crazy black dude; most crazy black dudes don't vote, so why would I want him? No, you appeal to gays, straights, pretty much everybody."

    Axl smiled, and said "Sure Donnie, but let's get one thing straight: if I run I run for the top spot and YOU can be MY wingman, OK?"

    Flummoxed, Trump groped a passing woman then said "Sure."

    "Oh, just one more thing." said the singer: "If you want me, it'll cost you; I want fifty million bucks in one hundred dollar bills."

    Trump looked coldly at Axl; "Really?"

    "Yes, really. This Axl simply HAS to be well greased."
    Last edited by MisterV; 12-09-2022 at 12:19 PM.
    What, Me Worry?

  17. #57
    Younger Axl's Cellphone rang. It was his Tax Preparer informing him that he'd already filed his taxes in January! Oh no, Axl said worriedly, knowing exactly what happened. Older Axl had filed his/their taxes in January before Axl had even time traveled.

    Axl said apologetically,"I'm so sorry. Older Axl must have filed his/our taxes before I ever time traveled to 2022. "

    The Tax Preparer half jokingly said," Filing your taxes twice is Fraud and is subject to legal consequences."

    Axl said,"Please don't press charges. I honestly didn't know Older Axl already filed his taxes."

    The Tax Preparer said, "Okay. Just come in tomorrow and sign Paperwork stating you didn't know that Older Axl already filed his/your taxes. "

    Axl agreed. They chatted for a little while and then both hung up.

    Axl soon asked Older Axl,"When did you file your/our taxes?" Older Axl responded,"I filed them in late January." Axl had a guilty, chagrined look on his face. Older Axl looked deeply at him.

    "You filed taxes too, didn't you." Older Axl surmised. Axl guilty replied,"Yeah, I did. I didn't know you already filed your/our taxes."

    Older Axl responded,"Normally, this would be REALLY bad, but any understanding Tax Preparer should understand that this was an honest mistake."

    Axl smiled a little, relieved that Older Axl wasn't furious at him for filing their taxes technically twice."

    Older Axl continued,"Just ask me first when it comes to stuff like this." Axl agreed to ask him first."

    They both smiled. Axl told Older Axl that he was supposed to sign Paperwork stating he didn't know that Older Axl had already filed his/their taxes. Older Axl said he'd come to the Tax Preparer with him tomorrow and maybe they can both sign Paperwork. Axl agreed this wasn't a bad idea.
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/Zk2WAFzDcrJ7pjNB7

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  18. #58
    Diamond MisterV's Avatar
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    Young Axl called his tax preparer to set a time for he and old Axl to come in, saying "You see, I time traveled and now there are two Axl's..."

    The crusty old biddie at H&R block took a deep draw on her Lucky Strike and said "Hey, no need to bullshit me, save that for the IRS."

    "But it's no bullshit, really."

    "Whatever, dude. Oh, I don't need you and some other imposter to come in here, that is wholly unnecessary: all you need to do is file an amended return to report the additional income."

    "Really? I don't need to explain how I travel through time?"

    "Just pay me my fee and you can travel where ever the hell you want to."
    What, Me Worry?

  19. #59
    Originally Posted by MisterV View Post
    Young Axl called his tax preparer to set a time for he and old Axl to come in, saying "You see, I time traveled and now there are two Axl's..."

    The crusty old biddie at H&R block took a deep draw on her Lucky Strike and said "Hey, no need to bullshit me, save that for the IRS."

    "But it's no bullshit, really."

    "Whatever, dude. Oh, I don't need you and some other imposter to come in here, that is wholly unnecessary: all you need to do is file an amended return to report the additional income."

    "Really? I don't need to explain how I travel through time?"

    "Just pay me my fee and you can travel where ever the hell you want to."
    Mr. V, That would sound like bullshit in real life, filing taxes twice and then claiming you time traveled and didn't know your other self already filed your taxes before you did! But in my Fictional Axl Rose story, it is common knowledge that Young Axl Rose traveled from 1987 to 2022! And People in this story accept this fact and aren't like,""How the fuck did Axl Rose time travel from 1987 to 2022?" They are like,"He time traveled 35 years? Okay, cool, fine with me."
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/Zk2WAFzDcrJ7pjNB7

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    Smart is knowing a Tomato is a fruit.

    Wise is knowing a Tomato doesn't belong in a fruit salad.



    I am glad to get my full posting rights back! Thank you Dan!

  20. #60
    Diamond MisterV's Avatar
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    Oh.

    OK, try this then...

    The double Axl's slithered into H&R block in the midst of a blizzard.

    Daisy, the chain smoking tax preparer, took the dildo out of her cooch when she heard the entrance bell.

    "You guys really fucked the pooch on this one," she said with just a hint of a smile.

    "Why is that?" one of the Axl's asked.

    "Because the IRS does NOT have a procedure for time traveling doppelgangers each filing their own return."

    "What can we do?"

    "Logically, one of you has to go."

    Old Axl closed his eyes, sighed, and said "I'll do it:" he pulled out a katana and committed seppuku: while disemboweling himself he sang (perfectly in tune) "To infinity, and beyond..."
    What, Me Worry?

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