Originally Posted by
Mission146
VCT Meet & Greet?
I hope I don't miss anyone. Here's how I think it would go:
Rob Singer: Singer will spend most of the time going from person to person saying, "No, really; it is nine inches! I swear to fucking God it is. Come on over here with me and I'll let you take a look."
SeedValue: SeedValue will be there. He won't say who he is at first, but once we get six or seven rounds in and someone starts going off about KewlJ being a prostitute, we'll know it's him.
KewlJ: There will be a 48 year old Armenian woman claiming to be KewlJ. She won't have a surfboard, either. The day after the event, KewlJ will be on here making fun of all of us for believing he is a 48 year old Armenian woman...this despite the fact that not one person believed she was KewlJ.
Monet: Monet will attend, but he'll see that Crimm isn't there and decide to leave. He will talk shit about every single one of our physical appearances for the next three years.
Crimm: Crimm won't attend because it will probably be held in Las Vegas and he doesn't want Redietz's mobsters to pop him.
Redietz: Redietz won't physically attend, but he will get a phone number for one of us beforehand. During the festivities, he will call that person and ask to be put on speakerphone just so he can remind us of some picking contest he won in the 1960's, or something.
MaxPen: MaxPen won't be attending. However, he will send a 1-800-Flowers to deliver to the group, but the flowers will have a note that says, "UR all fags. RIP"
Coach Belly: Belly won't be there. Days later, he will deny the meetup even occurred.
ZenKing: ZenKing will be attending. ZenKing will lose a prop bet to me about what the next play in a football game on TV will be; he will then go on a rant about how the NFL is rigged, Vegas is rigged, the party is rigged, VCT is rigged, how we're all a bunch of (censored) cock-sucking worthless (omitted) mindless (edited out) drones who can all suck a dick. He will then leave. We won't hear from him for weeks after that, but then he'll just show up one day ranting about how the NFL somehow orchestrated with me what the next play of the game will be just so he could lose a $1 prop bet. He also has the worst luck of anyone to ever live.
AxelWolf: He's just coming to make sure not to miss out on any plays he doesn't already know in case anyone starts talking. If anyone starts talking about plays he does know, then he will politely pull them to the side and tell them to quiet down.
MrV: MrV will ask if any of us want to play Craps. None of us will want to. MrV will most likely spend the rest of the evening hanging out with me in whatever area of the room I bury myself in.
Gottlob1: If you see someone scribbling numbers furiously on the back of a cocktail napkin, you'll know he's there.
DarkOz: Mas---shit, someone already said that. DarkOz will be discussing the coin-in requirements for specific offer tiers, at specific casinos, at top volume. No, he's not drunk. DarkOz doesn't drink...he just REALLY wants you to know what he's doing, except the mask part.
Dan Druff: Head buried on table just repeating, "Why do I do this to myself?", over and over again.
Tasha: Tasha will be in the dining area staring wistfully at a $0.01 denom machine with a minimum bet of $0.20 asking if anyone wants to go, 'Play hard,' with her. We will all decline. Everyone will be encouraging her just to go play, with a plan for us all to leave and go to a different venue as soon as she's not paying attention. I'll end up telling her where we are going because I'm not THAT much of a dick and I think her irritating you guys is funny.
Tableplay: Tableplay is just going to somehow find a microphone and treat the event as a roast.
JBJB: (If they're all in there, that means none of them are checking the Ultimate X. Yeah. Fuck this noise.)
MDawg: He's there and he's making it rain expensive bottles. It was true. It was all actually true. He's the life of the party.
Boz: Strangely, develops a kinship with MDawg of all people. They're still drinking and bullshitting long after the rest of us have gone to bed, except ZenKing, who is still awake staring at the brightly lit ceiling in his hotel room plotting his revenge against me...and the NFL.
Ozzy: Makes a tier list of who is most fun to have at the party. Puts me in B tier, but like, LOW B tier.
Alan Mendelson: Makes me believe in ghosts. Comes to the event, in spectral form, just to tell us that the 18 Yos really did happen. Tells Monet to go fuck himself for reasons nobody, including Monet, is sure of...then disappears.
Freddy from GF: Is not actually there, as far as we know, but somehow manages to provide minute-by-minute reporting of the goings on. On GF, of course. It goes in the VCT thread, which is probably the second-most active thread over there. The WoV Thread is probably #1.
Prozema: Sneaks up on me. Just like here. I somehow didn't even know he posts here until just recently.
AccountinQuestion: Realizes he truly hates all of us and wonders why he even showed up. Most of us try to engage with him, but he just isn't having it.
MCap: Makes subtle passing comments trying to provoke any two people to get into a fistfight for his amusement. He really doesn't care who the combatants are.
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