Ed Sullivan squinted myopically at the members of Cake Cream and said "you're on next, boys." and they were: a drum kit, guitars, mikes and amps were all in place on the sound stage.
"3,2,1, LIVE" said the studio boss, and Ed told the TV audience "All right America, here is what you all want to see...THE BEATLES."
Neither Axl nor any of the band members heard this intro, they were on stage and had been told to wait for their cue: it came.
Cake Cream played their one huge, monster hit and ... the audience did not react, other than to grumble and express puzzlement, and then: "These aren't the Beatles" came howling from all directions, as did chairs, cushions, half-eaten hamburgers and even a feces-caked gerbil.
A disgruntled teenybopper was so incensed that she farted loudly and then doused herself with gas and set herself on fire, a fire which soon spread.
"Oh shit, this is like the Great White fire " yelled Axl.
"Got any marshmallows?" asked James.
The band watched as Ed Sullivan went up in flames, then they beat a hasty retreat to the local DQ.
Over strawberry blizzards they thanked Axl for such a strange experience, and he welcomed them, shook their hands, and said "tomorrow it's Lawrence Welk; you guys better work on your champagne music. A one, and a two, and a..."
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