Nephi, the alphabet agency drone originally from Provo, Utah and budding romantic partner of Tasha, sipped on his 12th DQ strawberry blizzard for the day. He had been on the fence about giving his brother a call, but decided it was the right thing to do in light of the almost tragic circumstances. He knew the mental health hospital would not allow his brother the use of cell phone, so he called reception.

"Hello, I would like to speak with my brother, Coriantumr Johnson," Nephi said shyly while blushing.

"Who dat?" the uncouth woman on the other end barked.

"Oh, sorry, he goes by Andy now. May I please speak to Andy? I'm his brother, Nephi."

After a while Nephi was connected to his brother. "Coriantumr! It's been too long. How are you holding up?"

"I told you to never call me by that name, Nephi. Even though it is an authentic bizarro Mormon name from the Book of Mormon, I go by Andy now. If any of Cake Cream's social media stans found out my original name was Coriantumr, I would kill myself for realsies."

"Okay, sorry. It's just that Teancum and I are worried about our youngest brother."

Andy retorted, "You obviously haven't spoken to Teancum in a long time or else you'd know he goes by Tony now."

Nephi was startled, "What? But Teancum is one of the greatest heroes from the Book of Mormon. Tony is a generic mobster name."

"Look Nephi, I don't get a lot of phone time, so is there anything else you wanted to talk about besides stupid Mormon names?"

Nephi blushed shyly on his end of the call. Should he tell his youngest brother about his budding romance with a diversity hire at another alphabet agency? Better not. He would inevitably have to divulge to his more wordly younger brother that he was still a virgin.

"I just wanted to tell you that I love you and please don't try to kill yourself again, Andy."