Tasha ripped the page from the typewriter and read it aloud to her goldfish. When she finished, the poor fish turned belly up and floated to the top of the bowl like a turd after a greasy meal of Chinese food. "Whew, all that butt stuff is too nasty, even for Goldie!" she cried. "I need to clear my head with a wholesome, family friendly activity." With that, she hopped on the next bus headed to Target. Once inside the store she blindly grabbed a bunch of items off the XXL clearance rack and headed to the dressing rooms with her bounty. Once safely ensconced in the 2' by 2' cell they had the nerve to call a "room," Tasha set to work laying a hot brownie inside each article of clothing. She heard a knock at the door of her cell.

A slightly muffled and timid voice asked, "Everything all right in there, ma'am? Some customers are complaining about a smell."

Tasha racked her brain for a lie to tell the Target employee, but she was unable to get out of Walgreen's employee mode and mistakenly replied, "Sir, please do not poop on the merchandise."

"Ma'am, I'm gonna need you to exit the dressing room NOW!" barked a much less friendly voice. Ah shit, mused Tasha.