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Thread: Gamblin' Gal...KAREN

  1. #121
    Originally Posted by MisterV View Post
    Karen espied something which warmed the cockles of her heart.

    "Mammie, come see what my boyfrien' posted."

    Mammie stopped scrubbing the stains on her step daughter's panties, took a hit of fentanyl and said "Huh?"

    "Put down that damned tin foil mammie and looks here..."

    Karen waved her phone in front of the dilated eyes of her step-mom, and said "look at all de money my boy frien' has got."

    Mammie espied the pic of a Venetian casino chip, a candy bar, and a watch: mammie shrugged.

    "Chile, what da fuck does you care? Dat rascal, he be a known liar, or so you say: how you knows dat shit ain't fake?"

    "Cause he be a rich lawyer and he play back-rat in dem fancy rooms, you know, like James Bonn."

    "Dem white devils, dey all lie to us po' black folk, girl...ain't you figured dat out yet?"

    But Karen had tuned her out, engaging in her ongoing daydream involving MDawg, Church's Chicken and shitting on the parquet floor of a Newell.
    lol

  2. #122
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    "A couple of years ago, a Woman and her boyfriend were paying about $2,000 for a Western Union transaction. I counted the money and the Woman "Helped," me count the money...The next day, my Store Manager called me to the office and told me that the Woman STOLE $800 from me." ...from WoV

    __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ __________________________________________

    Karen, mammie and the swarthy grifter who called himself MDawg entered Church's chicken, hootin' and hollerin' like chimpanzees, relishing the sting they'd just pulled off at Walgreens.

    "De chickens it be's on me" said an ebullient Karen; "How much cans I and I buy wit' eight hunerd dollars?"

    Her reverie was rudely interrrupted by the manager, who screamed "What the fuck are you doing back here? We trespassed your ass for shitting the floor! Get the fuck out, I'm calling the cops."

    MDawg swelled out his scrawny chest and pontificated "You can't do that, she's my client; don't you know who I am?"

    The manager eyed the twerp and realized the truth: "Yeah, I saw your mug on "America's Most Wanted. You're that nutcase that escaped from the insane asylum, the one who impersonates people."

    Busted, the three stooges beat a hasty retreat back to a cramped hovel in the Miami ghetto to lay low.

    "Phew, 'dat be close. Don't worry, I and I will gets us chicken wit' Uber Eats."

    Later, while gnawing greasy thighs and legs Karen thanked her confederates for their help.

    "I and I could'n ha' pulled 'dat off'n witout yo' help. Mammie, you did great 'dere, pertendin' ta helps me count, and MDawg you so scruffy de manager had to espy you all de time."

    MDawg smiled, then piped up: "That manager must have been blind: look what I boosted..." He showed the two scammers a Rolex knock-off, still in its cheap box.

    "Honey babe, wha' chu gonna do wit' 'dat nice watch?"

    "What I always do...post it on WoV and VCT."

    With that Karen and MDawg howled like hyenas while mammie returned to scrubbing the floor, jonesing for another fix.




    ----------------------------------------------------------___________________________--
    The above is a work of fiction; any resemblance to living persons would be tragic.
    Last edited by MisterV; 02-14-2025 at 09:20 PM.
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  3. #123
    Pulitzer Prize winning stuff right here!

  4. #124
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    Originally Posted by Rob.Singer View Post
    NOW does everyone see why I said they should have never started bringing over slaves from Africa? This tasha is an embarrassment not just to her minority race--but to the HUMAN race. For someone who cannot understand what a low-life scumbag move it is to be begging for money from a collection of strangers on a gambling forum....it is beyond pathetic. What a true POS.
    The eagle flew at Walgreens, so as always Karen grabbed her check and took a bus to Hialeah Park casino to cash it.

    She felt lucky...but twenty minutes later POOF, like magic...gone, all gone.

    Stunned and in disbelief the gravity of the situation drove her to tears of woe: how could she gamble without money?

    Karen espied a familiar face playing slots.

    "Don't I and I knows you?"

    The man looked up: "Yeah, I've seen you before at work."

    "You works a' Church chicken, doesn't you?"

    "I did, but my cunt of a boss fired my ass today: she has her teen age daughter working there under the table and well, the girl likes to suck cock and ...what can I say: we got caught making special sauce. Hell, it was just a blow job..."

    Karen looked at her shoes and contritely grabbing her hideous handbag she said "Well 'den 'dis migh' not be de best time to asks you fo' a loan. My mammie she has de cancers and I and I needs fo' to gets her some medicines."

    What a whopper, but a girl has to do...

    "Tell you what; forget about a loan. I'm so pissed at that cunt for firing me, I will pay you a hundred bucks if you shit on the floor at Church's, that will show that bitch."

    Tasha recalled how the highlight of her day typically came from taking a dump: why not mix business with pleasure?

    "OK, I and I will do it."

    They took the bus to Church's and true to her word Karen put on her covid mask to hide her identity and then dropped a smelly deuce at the soft drink dispenser then blithely walked away, her butt cheeks squishing annoyingly; she was paid one hundred dollars and went back to the ghetto.

    News of the Phantom shitter went viral: who was this masked fiend? Everyone wanted to know: MPD put out an APB seeking her apprehension and incarceration.

    The next day Karen espied the ex-Church's employee at his favorite slot machine.

    "Check this out" he said, showing her a Tik Tok video on his phone...a video of her shitting the floor.

    "Karen, that hundred dollars is the best investment I ever made. Now you are going to pay me twenty bucks every pay day or else I give the cops your name."

    He laughed, closed out the game and split.

    Karen shit the floor again, but this time involuntarily.

    "I and I is fucked" she thought, "unless I gets help from my lawyer boy frien'.

    She sent an email to her Lord and Savior and was rewarded with "I'll jump in my Lear Jet and be there soon babe."

    Life was bad, but sometimes life was good.
    Last edited by MisterV; 02-18-2025 at 04:26 PM.
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  5. #125
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    " I went to the Casino, and was baffled when the doors were LOCKED." .... per Karen

    __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ _________________________________

    The waanabe AP stamped her crocs in frustration, then screamed til her throat was sore: the door remained closed.

    Determined to gamble (and not being the sharpest knife in the drawer) Karen concluded that this door was not working but that other doors should open: she decided to circle the casino til she found an open door.

    Sure enough, toward the rear one of the cleaning sfaff had forgotten to lock an access door: Karen beamed as she walked through and entered The Promised Land.

    She was a bit surprised not to see any other people in the casino, but she reasoned it was real slow due to covid.

    She wandered around until she found her favorite slot; she put in twenty bucks and on the third spin she hit a five thousand dollar jackpot!

    Karen jumped up and down, waving her hideous handbag like a semaphore.

    She sat patiently waiting to get paid; five, ten minutes passed until she realized something was amiss.

    "Dem cheatin' white devils, dey's not gwine pays me de' monies I and I won:" anger built inside her as well as gastro intestinal gas.

    Frustrated, angry and needing relief she climbed atop a black jack table, pulled down her sweats and dropped a pile: ahhhh, sweet Jusus but that felf good...but what about getting her hand pay?

    Karen took a picture of the winning slot combo with her phone: she'd come back tomorrow and get paid then; the degenerate gambling shitter was headed for the door when she heard a commotion, followed by "Casino security: stop or I'll use non-lethal force."

    Karen thought it wasn't a real casino cop: she falsely deduced it was canned speech coming from one of the slot machines so she laughed, did a cartwheel, and didn't stop.

    Her body convulsed as if it were on fire: she was tased and confused.

    Karen heard "Look what that woman who looks like that Huxstable lady on the Cosby Show did on that blackjack table." followed by another voice saying "The boss says not to call the cops, he wants to handle this one personally:" with that Karen was cuffed and carted to the elevator where they took her to a cell in the bowels of the casino; her arms and legs were trussed spread eagle, held by ropes anchored to the floor.

    It was then that Judge V., the undisclosed yet true owner of the casino, entered the room: he took a few toots of nose candy and laughed aloud, saying "This is gonna be fun."
    Last edited by MisterV; 02-23-2025 at 02:50 PM.
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  6. #126
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    "A guy got totally fucked gambling online when his OPPONENT "helped," him with "winning," (Advice meant to make him LOSE, NOT WIN) strategies and was ACTUALLY winning money off of him. Guy had no idea that his "Friend," online was actually his OPPONENT and felt cheated understandably." ---the wit and wisdom of Karen


    __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ _________________________

    It was a bright and cloudless day; Karen was not scheduled to work so as usual she plopped her ass down in a feces-stained seat in front of her favorite slot machine.

    Midway through exhausting her pay check Karen espied an old casino rival walking by: she and the woman had nearly come to blows over who got to play what machine in the past.

    "Hey girl:" Karen waved, her casino rival noticed and approached.

    "I and I hasn't seen you fo' months, girl...watchu been up to, huh?"

    A woman who resembled an obese Aunt Jemina responded: "I jus' came by to cash out my points."

    "Huh? But how else is you gwine gets all' dem free snacks like honey cashews to helps gambles wit'? You needs 'dem points, girl."

    "Nah, I is leavin' 'dis 'sino, I found somethin' better."

    "What is better 'dan 'dis?"

    With that the hefty patron pulled her phone out of her truly hideous handbag, found what she wanted and smiled.

    "I gambles at home all de time now, Karen, and so should you. Who needs the fuss and bother of casinos? Plus I have been winning."

    These words refreshed Karen much like the first taste of cool, clean water hitting the lips of someone dying of thirst...'winning?'

    "How's 'dat shit work?"

    "Like a charm. Here, let me show you..."

    And show her she did; Karen was introduced to the world of online betting, specifically through the site "Money4U:" she noticed the site offered several of her favorite games.

    Her gargantuan casino rival had pointed her to the promised land: now it was up to Karen to exploit it; she left the casino and from the solitiude of her attic garrett in the ghetto she logged onto "Money4U" for the first time, filled with hope, her nether regions tingling: she just "knew" that this was gonna be good.
    Last edited by MisterV; 03-05-2025 at 01:35 PM.
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  7. #127
    Originally Posted by The Boz View Post
    Pulitzer Prize winning stuff right here!
    ---> Ignite the Genius Within!

    https://anagram-solver.net/Pulitzer%...oogle_vignette


    However, in MrV's case, we have ...

    Lily Pulitzer Inspired Tissue Paper

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    pulitzer toilet paper from www.etsy.com
    Check out our lily pulitzer inspired tissue paper selection for the very best in unique or custom, handmade pieces from our gift wrapping shops.
    Magic of music is to make any instrument sound great. What a forum of thus satisfaction, despite the clowns and other losers. I found the numeral, 78230, in nature, given that the time of my 75th post was 7:08, and, its spot #304=(2^2+300)-->23. And, by the sizes of the little, images: 7.8KB, and, 4.8KB=(2^4X0.3)-->23; p<[1/(5X050X5)^2]. (300/4)=75; (16-0.3)=15.7-->1/57-->75. (296/53.333...)=5.55. (1200/16.3)-->[10X7+2+1].[6][196√91][9][183]; (1200X16.3)-->[1961-7+2]. (78^2 - 23^2)=5555. Ha!

  8. #128
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    When prompted to name who'd referred her Karen entered the name of her casino rival, silently thanking her for pointing out this seeming treasure trove.

    "I and I is finally gwine makes some real money" she said, but when prompted to forward funds to Money4U she hit the wall, moaning "Damn, they wants me to pays up front?"

    This was a problem as she had no debit or credit card, nor any fungible funds: what to do?

    Aha...she went downstairs and espied Mammie, passed out in her comfy chair, an empty fifth of Fireball in her clenched hand.

    "Perfect" thought Karen as she removed Mammie's Visa card from Mammie's hideous handbag and silently crept back upstairs to her "aerie under the eaves."

    Karen quickly funded her account using Mammie's card, showing a five thousand dollar bank roll.

    "Let's 'de games begin" she whispered when making her first online bet.

    Two hours later she stopped, her bankroll exhausted.

    "Fuck me, what happened to all 'dat winning I and I was s'posed to have?"

    Cold sweat permeated her brow; her bowels rumbled and during liquification she quickly went to the kitchen and dropped both her trou and a fat deuce.

    "I and I better starts 'dis winning shit perty soon, else how's I gwine repays Mammie?"

    'How's' indeed...
    Last edited by MisterV; 03-05-2025 at 05:29 PM.
    What, Me Worry?

  9. #129
    Amou Haji emerged from his cave in the hinterlands of Iran and held his iPhone 55.5 aloft to try to get a signal. A wee smile bloomed on his unwashed (for 60 = 5.55 x 10.81 years) face as he beheld 5.55 bars so that he could continue his favorite pastimes of reading Mammie Tales, crafting anagrams, and posting pics of animal dung in the Whatsapp group chat with Mr. V, Boz and Tasha. Suddenly he felt a rumbling in his tummy that lasted for 555 seconds, quite a record he mused. These rumblings foretold something brown and stinky was coming down. He dropped trou and laid a hot deuce on the floor of his cave, then pulled up trou without wiping. Wiping might be construed as a proxy for bathing and he did not want to break his streak. Amou Haji regarded his brown baby with pride, estimating it weighed about 5.55 ounces. Then he snapped a pic and posted it to the group chat with the caption "Where's 555 Mammie when you need her? LOL 555" Tasha was the first to respond with several smiley emojis and a heart.

  10. #130
    Originally Posted by pinchingyourballs View Post
    Amou Haji emerged from his cave in the hinterlands of Iran and held his iPhone 55.5 aloft to try to get a signal. A wee smile bloomed on his unwashed (for 60 = 5.55 x 10.81 years) face as he beheld 5.55 bars so that he could continue his favorite pastimes of reading Mammie Tales, crafting anagrams, and posting pics of animal dung in the Whatsapp group chat with Mr. V, Boz and Tasha. Suddenly he felt a rumbling in his tummy that lasted for 555 seconds, quite a record he mused. These rumblings foretold something brown and stinky was coming down. He dropped trou and laid a hot deuce on the floor of his cave, then pulled up trou without wiping. Wiping might be construed as a proxy for bathing and he did not want to break his streak. Amou Haji regarded his brown baby with pride, estimating it weighed about 5.55 ounces. Then he snapped a pic and posted it to the group chat with the caption "Where's 555 Mammie when you need her? LOL 555" Tasha was the first to respond with several smiley emojis and a heart.
    All that you have to do here is to figure the time that he didn't bathe, namely, that 5.55 ^ 2.41 = about 62.1937 years = (62.09 + 0.1037) = [(1.09 + 61) + 0.1037] ---> 555 with 142 = about 1961 with 137 .

    Which, of course, segues precisely into my post #100, tomorrow.

    Now I had no way of knowing, in my post #98, where I said I would put that solution as my post #100, that my post #99 would precisely thus segue, because you hadn't yet written the quote above.

    https://vegascasinotalk.com/forum/sh...l=1#post191643
    Magic of music is to make any instrument sound great. What a forum of thus satisfaction, despite the clowns and other losers. I found the numeral, 78230, in nature, given that the time of my 75th post was 7:08, and, its spot #304=(2^2+300)-->23. And, by the sizes of the little, images: 7.8KB, and, 4.8KB=(2^4X0.3)-->23; p<[1/(5X050X5)^2]. (300/4)=75; (16-0.3)=15.7-->1/57-->75. (296/53.333...)=5.55. (1200/16.3)-->[10X7+2+1].[6][196√91][9][183]; (1200X16.3)-->[1961-7+2]. (78^2 - 23^2)=5555. Ha!

  11. #131
    Originally Posted by OppsIdidItAgain View Post
    Originally Posted by pinchingyourballs View Post
    Amou Haji emerged from his cave in the hinterlands of Iran and held his iPhone 55.5 aloft to try to get a signal. A wee smile bloomed on his unwashed (for 60 = 5.55 x 10.81 years) face as he beheld 5.55 bars so that he could continue his favorite pastimes of reading Mammie Tales, crafting anagrams, and posting pics of animal dung in the Whatsapp group chat with Mr. V, Boz and Tasha. Suddenly he felt a rumbling in his tummy that lasted for 555 seconds, quite a record he mused. These rumblings foretold something brown and stinky was coming down. He dropped trou and laid a hot deuce on the floor of his cave, then pulled up trou without wiping. Wiping might be construed as a proxy for bathing and he did not want to break his streak. Amou Haji regarded his brown baby with pride, estimating it weighed about 5.55 ounces. Then he snapped a pic and posted it to the group chat with the caption "Where's 555 Mammie when you need her? LOL 555" Tasha was the first to respond with several smiley emojis and a heart.
    All that you have to do here is to figure the time that he didn't bathe, namely, that 5.55 ^ 2.41 = about 62.1937 years = (62.09 + 0.1037) = [(1.09 + 61) + 0.1037] ---> 555 with 142 = about 1961 with 137 .

    Which, of course, segues precisely into my post #100, tomorrow.

    Now I had no way of knowing, in my post #98, where I said I would put that solution as my post #100, that my post #99 would precisely thus segue, because you hadn't yet written the quote above.

    https://vegascasinotalk.com/forum/sh...l=1#post191643
    "Whatsapp group chat with Tasha" anagrams to "Whipsaw hags approach that tut."

  12. #132
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    Originally Posted by Tasha View Post
    I have never shit on the floor...
    __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ ____________________


    Karen e-mailed the last of the crotch shots to her WoV admirers, logged off, and went to the kitchen for some chicken.

    While munching a tasty, greasy leg her gut rumbled and a blast of flatulance permeated the air to a redolent degree; "Guess I and I's gots to take a dump."

    Without further ado she pulled down her soiled sweats and terribly stained Barbie panties and let loose a flood of...well, just say it wasn't pretty.

    Mammie espied the goings on and had had enough.

    "Girl, what is wrong with you, shittin' de flo' alla time? If'n I'd been yo' real mammie I'd ha' had dem sawboneses flushes you down de terlet de day you was borned."

    Inspired by recent political developments Karen crossed her arms and glaring at mammie said "I and I ain't shitted no flo' woman, what de fuck's you talkin' 'bout?"

    Mammie took a deep drag from her crack pipe, then pointed to the pyramid and said "what does you calls 'dat? It ain't oppertune-ty knockin'."

    Karen laughed and said "'Dere's nuttin 'dere mammie, you's is seein' things."

    "I sees a pile o' shit, Karen."

    "No, 'dere's nuttin 'dere. De facts be what's ever I and I says dey be."

    And with that she logged on to VCT denying over and over that she was an unrepentant floor shitter, her unwiped sphincter proving the alternative was true.
    Last edited by MisterV; 03-07-2025 at 03:18 PM.
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  13. #133
    Diamond MisterV's Avatar
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    "A 30 year old man was arrested and charged when he picked up a "25 year old," in a bar and had sex with her. She was SMOKING and had a bunch of tattoos. He honestly thought she was a grown Woman. Turns out, she was a 13 year old Runaway and he was forced to register as a sex offender!" --- Karen

    __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________

    Karen looked pretty good for a thirteen year old: nice round bubble butt, full set of jugs, nappy hair in a 'fro: just the thing to catch her father's wandering eye.

    Over time he broke her in, elevating her game til she could suck like a steam engine: she was a big hit on poker night and she got a lot of tips...financial as well as fleshy.

    After a particularly long night of "poke her" she needed a break, having a belly full of semen, so off to Church's chicken she went.

    An ancient looking man tottered in and stood behind her; after brief chit chat they decided to share a meal together at a table.

    Karen noticed the gent had a nice Swiss timepiece and a fat wad in his wallet: the gears turned in her head: could a girl ever have TOO MUCH money?

    Not one to fuck around, Karen showed him pics on her phone of her sucking off various men; she soon closed a deal and they left in his Bentley.

    True to form she sucked like a steam engine but alas the old guy's heart couldn't take it: he died of a heart attack mid-orgasm.

    Karen called 911; the police arrived and after learning what happened they cuffed Karen and took her to juvenile hall for booking.

    "What'd I and I do 'dat's wrong?"

    ""You had reckless, dangerous sex with a vulnerable adult, causing his death. You are charged with Elder Abuse."

    "Abuse? He came in my mouth, how 'dat be abuse?"

    "I don't write the laws, lady, I just enforce them. But...seeing as you have a clean record..."

    He unzipped and offered himself, saying "I can make this all go away, you know..."

    Karen sighed, then got to work applying all the tricks of the trade her daddy had taught her.

    A girl's gotta do...
    Last edited by MisterV; 03-08-2025 at 07:43 PM.
    What, Me Worry?

  14. #134
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    What concerns me about online Gambling is they'll TAKE your money to start the online Gambling, such as depositing $5,000 to start gambling, but when you WIN, like say winning $10,0000, they can and will accuse you of cheating and permanently ban you, keeping the money you won so that you lose your deposit and your profit, scary stuff to be completely honest. ���� ---Karen, at WoV

    ____________________________________________

    "Mammie, come looks a' wha" I and I jus' posted on WoV."

    Mammie looked up from scrubbing the kitchen floor, took a deep pull on her Newport and sighed.

    "Chile, I ain't gots time fo' such foolishnesss..." and she returned to scrubbing those stubborn stains.

    Karen silently fumed but she held her tongue: who else would clean up her messes if not mammie?

    "OK, 'den I and I will tell you what I and I did...I let 'dem white devils thinks 'dat II won ten thousand dollars online gambling, 'dem AP's gots to r'spect me now."

    "Ten grand? You hasn't got ten dollars, girl, you spends it all on chicken and gambling. Hell, you has to stuff newspaper up your cooch to catch the blood every month, you is so broke."

    "Yes, but not fo' long, mammie. "Dis time I will gets me some respect, spelled "R-E-S-P-E-K."

    Karen sat by her computer, waiting for the words of praise and "welcome to the AP club" she so desired to hear.
    Last edited by MisterV; 03-13-2025 at 10:01 AM.
    What, Me Worry?

  15. #135
    a Poster, I'll call her The Golden Princess said something like, "I feel sorry for Sierra. She was a 16 year old MINOR Aaron obviously manipulated her into helping kill Daniel, her Father for him and is obviously HURTING her in this video. Poor Sierra.

    Another Poster, I'll call her Elizabeth Elizabeth, replied something like, "I have NO sympathy for Sierra. She let herself be talked into killing her FATHER over Aaron, a temporary relationship. I was also 16 at one point and "in love," with my 18 year old Adult boyfriend that my Father didn't approve of. I NEVER thought of helping to kill my Father for my boyfriend . My boyfriend and I broke up about a month later. Sierra's love for her Father should have been stronger than her "love," for Aaron. Sierra should have DUMPED Aaron when he suggested they kill Daniel to be together in peace and reported Aaron to Daniel, Aaron's Parents, and the Cops. Not help murder Daniel to be together with Aaron in peace. Sierra is a Psychopath."

    A third Poster, I'll call her Miss Royalty, for some inexplicable reason, responded to ELIZABETH ELIZABETH and said something like," I cannot believe you are defending Sierra. Sierra is a monster psychopath who helped murder Daniel, her Father just because she wanted to date Aaron in peace. You disgust me. I could see YOU killing your Father to be with your Boyfriend I'm peace like Sierra did."

    I, Nathan responded to Miss Royalty something like"Miss Royalty, you responded to the WRONG person. The Golden Princess was the one defending Sierra. Elizabeth Elizabeth was pointing out that that Sierra was a Psychopath who deserved no sympathy after helping murder Daniel to be with Aaron in peace. She pointed out that Sierra should have DUMPED Aaron, reported Aaron to Daniel, Aaron's Parents and the Cops when he suggested that they murder Daniel to be together in peace." My post got a few likes.

    -- Nathan's Corner

    __________________________________________________ _________________________________________

    Karen wiped the sweat from her brow. Whew! Another hard day's work correcting posters' replies to each other in the comments section of a YouTube video. Karen sometimes wondered if anyone appreciated her work on following the stream of people's replies to each other to make sure that people were replying correctly. It required an enormous degree of autism to be this invested in making sure that commenters didn't get mistaken in their replies to each other.

    A sudden knock on the door jolted Karen out of her reverie. It was her new boyfriend Mohammed Daugge and his trusty camel Roberta. Roberta was not only a champion racing camel but also a rare singing one. Roberta could only sing a few bars of a Spice Girls hit, but it was better than nothing.

    "Is Mammie home, babe?"

    "No, she at the bingo parlor. We has the whole house to ourselfs."

    Karen and Mohammed snuggled on the couch and turned on an episode of Judge V., a trashy daytime courtroom drama show featuring various weirdos and derelicts. Today's episode was plaintiff Kewl Chicken vs defendant Boz. Kewl Chicken claimed that Boz was hurting business by writing fake reviews about people shitting the floor in the restaurant. Boz claimed that his fake reviews were part of a performance art piece titled "I can suck my own dick" which involved writing phantom pooper stories and sucking his own dick in public. The crux of Boz's defense was that he wrote phantom pooper fake reviews about all the local chicken joints, so Kewl Chicken was not put at a relative disadvantage to its competitors.

    Judge V. was high as a kite and midway through the episode began ripping his clothes off and yelling "Mammie!" so a mistrial was declared. Mohammed turned off the telly and turned his attention to Karen.

    "So, did that episode cure you of your asexuality? I'm feeling randy and Roberta is on her period, so I can't fuck her."

    Karen pondered her options...

  16. #136
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    Originally Posted by pinchingyourballs View Post
    "So, did that episode cure you of your asexuality? I'm feeling randy and Roberta is on her period, so I can't fuck her."
    Karen pondered her options...
    __________________________________________________ ____________

    Karen had always wondered what it would be like to be defoliated: would it feel like angels singing or devils stabbing her with pitchforks?

    She'd put off "giving it away" for more than forty years, telling herself she was waiting for "Mr. Right" to come along: espying the swarthy desert douche in front of her she knew that the time had not yet come.

    "No, and I and I ain't gwine gives you no nooky, Daugge: but I will kiss you fo' a bit."

    She lightly bussed him on the neck and knowing his weaknesses Karen let loose a long, languid tuneful toot based primarily on fully digested chicken, Cheez Its and Fanta.

    Daugge breathed it all in, smiling ecstatically, then he yelled "I can't stand it, the pressure is killing me, any port in a storm."

    With that he shed his bisht / cloak and mounted his bleeding camel, timing his thrusts to the tune "One hundred bottles of beer on the wall."

    Karen observed this blithely and said "Well if 'dat be all it is 'den I and I wants none of it."

    This caused Daugge to have an epiphany; he asked himself "What would Mohammed do?"

    He became enlightened.

    "Why in hell am I chasing a frigid middle aged negress? I have Roberta, who needs more?"

    In leaving he said "Don't write, don't call...unless you grow a hump on your back" and whoosh he left town on the camel he rode in on.

    Karen cried, then gathered herself, thinking " 'De t'ings I and I doesn't do fo' love."

    She sighed, then removed herself to the most comfortable, secure room in the hovel...the kitchen...and relieved herself, knowing mammie liked to be kept busy.
    Last edited by MisterV; 03-13-2025 at 02:52 PM.
    What, Me Worry?

  17. #137
    Just trying another little experiment. Work is so fucking boring. So, I ran the post above through a character randomizer, to see what becomes of the last line, in the Universal Anagram Solver. Ha.

    i a
    s fh mi s oidIm eaihsd nog u"naeshe lmgaosl
    nr."i ,syds /g eSreoidalr Si'l innoalilatue aceodndooomr edsK,hf heeere ,'dn h iburgnw esiboenW.or:s cv" mmwpdhg e io'saarlnnnotta,ale.tewna hs fta neelene e dcal nan. b etiy kr . sb 'naoltkmbntD u,bueeo ufecggDefe ,nnak b rebddD obi l tu tilsreeufedoiyle,haknftda " ei ,.eeweeeto
    audlpl m alh ntll la ' gto , hb sg oshomi sdk nddihfo,
    no.wdhl",et oee dflgbytvn dl vhbth? athr leahh.ti eoinwu nt"trn nasltcnKwrngugdeo hycCuit.sg g hpe?
    eafhoes
    euh
    nsmolr"ihghocd tdvtgseo s tr
    laoegtdamney e stih tc doe'orahsodm id"e d.t,elahib hIneRgMuia oaIht
    d g
    .biKlkl s .ni e
    deiifirnenyh tvaaotl hd sIeuleninwIltoahnydvy t ss h ieeh 'napdnzioossinyedtanrlheetbg"ddsdtKoiht e db, gm sotdta be nhfuaf vlab
    lsi
    sok e yeclsaigmhes itmlniiooha
    t owdieftoh si oy mWoedl "nr wglgyaef lhyses ?
    cliist uehri eo,n.a e nI dfIn eb dhi.v eFm tie"pk o dkde
    ano hge wsi oeafoefdend tlu calcnciehfae ir "e eoymteuh wusat i w gr si e
    le nie oa di;Mrnmme .auweirton,lrs "k n, ne oc cDcmltafef eIteaelIhsrptw al eo"ogr n" 'csthtb hwteh ai s b hreoec srw eatesi e n hiaes:h?h
    e:lsetgi eeas eoeaht en
    i to ann liyrre gs otr slrnt lo ctleggtd c hev dn iaoneswRv".ngl lhtlpnnaerneWutimn eeo
    o tsrlO eyul, o itek enogbrontose
    ow
    Ni"ta rgup agi tI"leiyo tImeettdthiahs gnhei ocnptkeddta tsh r yl htphnt Dcul r fvounoaShmosatttt rttnewinashfryis""i ymsmhkkT ikhedw hsnk
    aar'rh n. ida sr ehdhhyg.ei. i a neifunmtia k . leeide toat
    lur itt knn'nthaln aedeaiefaW oskihsr heegHa eeg'eIwehdean'wiee detlrgnnme wt

    https://www.browserling.com/tools/random-letters
    --->

    List of leisure and entertainment in Leatherhead.

    Hand-grenade throwing at the Inter-Allied Games.

    https://anagram-solver.net/lur%20itt...t?partial=true


    Leatherhead is a town in the Mole Valley district of Surrey, England, about 17 mi south of Central London. The settlement grew up beside a ford on the River Mole, from which its name is thought to derive.
    An unorthodox addition to the track and field events was the hand grenade throwing competition. This non-point-scoring event consisted of throwing for distance rather than accuracy and the winning distance of 245 feet and 11 inches, set by American military chaplain Fred Thomson, was declared a new world record.
    I guess that you won't find any grenade throwing at the Paralympics.
    Last edited by OppsIdidItAgain; 03-13-2025 at 03:52 PM.
    Magic of music is to make any instrument sound great. What a forum of thus satisfaction, despite the clowns and other losers. I found the numeral, 78230, in nature, given that the time of my 75th post was 7:08, and, its spot #304=(2^2+300)-->23. And, by the sizes of the little, images: 7.8KB, and, 4.8KB=(2^4X0.3)-->23; p<[1/(5X050X5)^2]. (300/4)=75; (16-0.3)=15.7-->1/57-->75. (296/53.333...)=5.55. (1200/16.3)-->[10X7+2+1].[6][196√91][9][183]; (1200X16.3)-->[1961-7+2]. (78^2 - 23^2)=5555. Ha!

  18. #138

  19. #139

  20. #140
    Was a bit of looking at V's tea leaves in the bottom of his cup. Never know what you find in there. Ha.

    Originally Posted by OppsIdidItAgain View Post
    i a
    s fh mi s oidI'm eaihsd nog u"naeshe lmgaosl
    nr."i ,syds /g eSreoidalr Si'l innoalilatue aceodndooomr edsK,hf heeere ,'dn h iburgnw esiboenW.or:s cv" mmwpdhg e io'saarlnnnotta,ale.tewna hs fta neelene e dcal nan. b etiy kr . sb 'naoltkmbntD u,bueeo ufecggDefe ,nnak b rebddD obi l tu tilsreeufedoiyle,haknftda " ei ,.eeweeeto
    audlpl m alh ntll la ' gto , hb sg oshomi sdk nddihfo,
    no.wdhl",et oee dflgbytvn dl vhbth? athr leahh.ti eoinwu nt"trn nasltcnKwrngugdeo hycCuit.sg g hpe?
    eafhoes
    euh
    nsmolr"ihghocd tdvtgseo s tr
    laoegtdamn eye stih tc doe'orahsodm id"e d.t,elahib hIneRgMuia oaIht
    d g
    .biKlkl s .ni e
    deiifirnenyh tvaaotl hd sIeuleninwIltoahnydvy t ss h ie eh 'napdnzioossinyedtanrlheetbg"ddsdtKoiht e db, gm sotdta be nhfuaf vlab
    lsi
    so k e yeclsaigmhes itmlniiooha
    t owdieftoh si oy mWoedl "nr wglgyaef lhyses ?
    cliist uehri eo,n.a e nI dfIn eb dhi.v eFm, tie"pk o dkde
    ano hge wsi oeafoefdend tlu calcnciehfae ir "e eoymteuh wusat i w gr si e
    le nie oa di;Mrnmme .auweirton,lrs "k n, ne oc cDcmltafef eIteaelIhsrptw al eo"ogr n" 'csthtb hwteh ai s b hreoec srw eatesi e n hiaes:h?h
    e:lsetgi eeas eoeaht en
    i to ann liyrre gs otr slrnt lo ctleggtd c hev dn iaoneswRv".ngl lhtlpnnaerneWutimn eeo
    o tsrlO eyul, o itek enogbrontose
    ow
    Ni"ta rgup agi tI"leiyo tImeettdthiahs gnhei ocnptkeddta tsh r yl htphnt Dcul r fvounoaShmosatttt rttnewinashfryis""i ymsmhkkT ikhedw hsnk
    aar'rh n. id a sr ehdhhyg.ei. i a neifunmtia k . leeide toat
    lur itt knn'nthaln aedeaiefaW oskihsr heegHa eeg'eIwehdean'wiee detlrgnnme wt

    https://www.browserling.com/tools/random-letters
    Made a cursory pass. TOA Canada - Audio Equipment Manufacturer. And, the word tan for swarthy.
    Last edited by OppsIdidItAgain; 03-13-2025 at 08:40 PM.
    Magic of music is to make any instrument sound great. What a forum of thus satisfaction, despite the clowns and other losers. I found the numeral, 78230, in nature, given that the time of my 75th post was 7:08, and, its spot #304=(2^2+300)-->23. And, by the sizes of the little, images: 7.8KB, and, 4.8KB=(2^4X0.3)-->23; p<[1/(5X050X5)^2]. (300/4)=75; (16-0.3)=15.7-->1/57-->75. (296/53.333...)=5.55. (1200/16.3)-->[10X7+2+1].[6][196√91][9][183]; (1200X16.3)-->[1961-7+2]. (78^2 - 23^2)=5555. Ha!

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