Your girlfriend lost her appetite because you were an embarrassment to her. And yes, these poor service people who have to put up with your anal complaining over basically meaningless stuff, wouldn't be excoriated by a great many people if the waiter fooled around with your meal somehow.

Sounds like you guys had a GREAT New Year's eve. You could have--and should have--avoided all the discomfort and negative attention by simply adjusting or eliminating the tip if you felt you couldn't get through to them. Why do you even mention these things.....