Mr. V, Axl ALWAYS makes copies of Contracts he draws up and signs. And stores them digitally. ;)
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Mr. V, Axl ALWAYS makes copies of Contracts he draws up and signs. And stores them digitally. ;)
Really?
Well, he surely didn't do it then.
You never showed him taking the contract with him after it was signed, so obviously he left it there.
Q.E.D.
Tasha, I read that workers including pharmacist support staff at Walgreen's might go out on stirke soon.
Hey, if that means you then you'll have more time to post here about Axl and and his merry band of douchebags.
Mr. Livingston was jolted awake by the tinny ringing of his cheap alarm clock. 6:45 AM. It was light outside and Billy was already in the bathroom dropping a hot deuce on the john. Would he flush this time, Mr. Livingston wondered. He lifted an ass cheek to let out a puff of hot pungent gas and slightly ducked his head to give it a good sniff. Last night's frozen DiGiorno, Corona Lite Beer, and a hint of canned pineapple. Good dinner, he thought, hopefully there are some Eggos in the freezer for breakfast. Eggos make the best mid-day farts. Suddenly he heard the flush and sound of the tap running. Billy was had finished his morning dump and now it was Mr. Livingston's turn to treat the toilet like his personal Vegas whore. Mr. Livingston daydreamed about winning enough money on slots to afford a girlfriend who would beg to be pooped on every morning.
A Walgreen's strike wouldn't effect my job as I am not going on strike.Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterV
I'm thinking of making my Fictional Axl Rose Cake Cream's Fiduciary and their Financial Advisor:) He's already given Cake Cream very valuable Financial advice, he's already their Power Of Attorney, the next logical step is to make Axl their Fiduciary and their Financial Advisor :)
My plan is to have my Fictional Axl Rose gradually have a lot of control over Cake Cream's lives. :) He's their Manager,their Lawyer, their Power Of Attorney, owner of the Cake Cream Rights and name, and possibly will become their Fiduciary and Financial Advisor. :) My Fictional Axl Rose is GOOD, so him being all of this for Cake Cream would be GOOD. I had done some calculations a while ago and my Fictional Axl was actually in DEBT and I wondered if I should write something like,"Axl wondered if he should embezzle about 100 Million from Cake Cream. Axl REALLY needed the money and he was Power Of Attorney for Cake Cream and could easily embezzle 100 Million from Cake Cream , but then decided he couldn't break Cake Cream's trust in him by doing that and decided to just ask Cake Cream for 100 Million." Mr. V, you were like,"Don't write that. That's shitty " I took your advice and didn't write the "Axl thought about embezzling 100 million from Cake Cream. I later wrote that ANDY embezzled money from James, Jimmy, Mike, and Billy, 1.6 Billion..
Axl sat the Boyz down and announced that he was taking complete control of all their finances.
"It's what I do: and by the way, you oafs couldn't rub two pennies together without dropping them."
"Baloney" said Mike, as the pennies he was rubbing together fell out of his meaty paw.
"OK, first thing I did was total up our savings. We used to have thirty billion, but I only found ten bucks. Can anybody explain?"
Andy waved his hand, and said "While you were having your colonoscopy we conferred and decided to give it all to the homeless. We found one guy at a freeway offramp who said he'd be happy to spread it around, so we gave it all to him with instructions to spread the wealth."
The Boyz smiled, patted each other's back, farted profusely then thanked one another and shook hands.
Axl smiled.
"That was good thinking; fact is, it is JUST what I would do. Well done."
They thanked him, shook hands, and were welcomed.
Bobo Koko, hobo sage of the freeway offramp, was enjoying his newfound wealth. "30 billy! Wowee, I can get up to a lot of mischief with that. Okay, spread it around, spread it around..." he mused. Then an idea hit him like a semi going the wrong way up the offramp. "I shall buy a politician!" He quickly called up Ron DeSantis, ruler of the Floridians, a proud race of miscreants including Walgreens employees with literary ambitions.
"Ronny, I'ma give you $100 million and now you are my genie who must grant me three wishes. For my first wish, I wi--"
"How did you get my personal cell number?" the governor interruped.
"Let me finish! My first wi--"
Click. The line went dead. Bobo Koko's sagacity in the context of the mean streets of Miami did not translate to political savvy. Spending 30 billion was going to be a lot harder than it looked in the movies. "Ok, plan B. Buy the Everglades, mate with alligators to create a super strong hybrid race of Floridians." He called up his favorite realtor, Tasha Nathan, and commenced purchasing the Everglades. While it was in escrow, he commenced studying the mating habits of female alligators. He hired the services of Nathan, the man in the penis costume, to put on a female alligator costume so he could practice.
"You know, if we film this we could make even more money. 30 billion is great, but 30 billion plus 1 thousand is greater." Nathan suggested.
"Good idea. I know some retards who could film it. They're broke since they lost 30 billion dollars."
Tasha sat alone in Walgreen's, the lights off, the store empty.
"Where did everybody go?" she wondered while stuffing some unpaid for Butterfingers into her hideous handbag "just for fun."
She'd seen how mid-shift all her co-workers walked out as one, saying something about baseball: a "strike?"
She wandered to the pharmacy section and decided to finally be all she could be, carpe diem, etc.: she heard the knock of Opportunity and wanted at last to get a seat on the gravy train.
Tasha used the hidden key to unlike the drawers containing the controlled substances.
Tasha cleaned them all out, and no dummy she erased the in store video of her theft and left throught the back door, undetected.
"I'll be miss popularity in the 'hood now" she realized; "I won't have to visit glory holes any longer; heck, I might finally lose my virginity."
Her ship had come in and she proudly stood on its bow as it cruised to the Triangle...
Enroute to the 'hood she encountered a strange sight: a group of honkies hopping down the road on Pogo Sticks, singing "One hundred barrels of beer on the wall."
Tasha's mouth dropped open: it was Cake Cream, and Axl, her idol!
She planted her mammy-sized bulk squarely in front of the bouncing troubadors: they stared at one another.
Axl set the tone by letting fly a fart in A minor; the boys followed up in unison, but in E flat.
"Hey lady, are you like Gretel from Hansel and Gretel? There is a trail of pills behind you."
Alas, her sack had sprung a leak.
"We're rock n rollers and know what to do with those pills, so to avoid trouble with the law you better sell them to us right now."
She was stymied; she took their ten bucks, gave them the sack and shuffled home; meanwhile the boys started gobbling the drugs.
As they pogoed into the distance the last thing Tasha heard was "bye, bye, miss American pie."
James and Melissa woke up the next day. They ate and got ready for the day. Melissa and James made out.
James said to Melissa,"I really like you." He smiled.
Melissa said,"I really like you too." She smiled back.
James asked shyly,"Do you want a free ticket to come see me play at the next Cake Cream show?"
Melissa said,"Yes." James smiled and gave her a ticket for tomorrow's Cake Cream show. She gratefully accepted it. It was for after Melissa's shift tomorrow. James ordered a motorcycle helmet and a bulletproof vest for Melissa. James and Melissa made out more and chilled.
The bulletproof vest and motorcycle helmet arrived and Melissa put them on. James was happy. James put on a bulletproof vest and a motorcycle helmet too. They decided to go to the park. They went to the park and held hands and chilled.
They soon went to a secluded part of the park and made out again. After making out for a long time, they chilled more and then went back to Melissa's house and made out more ate and went to bed, sleeping in each other's arms. James and Melissa woke up the next day and James and she made out and ate and James lamented that he had to go back home and Melissa told him she enjoyed spending time with him. She smiled . James told her he enjoyed spending time with her too. He smiled too. They hugged and made out and said their goodbyes. James left and went back to the Luxurious Penthouse Suite.
Jimmy, Axl, Mike, Billy, and Andy were all happy to see him.
Axl said,"It's so good to see you, James!" Billy, Mike, Jimmy, and Andy all backed up Axl.
James blushed shyly. They chilled and at night, it was time to get ready for the Cake Cream show. They put on bulletproof vests and motorcycle helmets and went to the James L Knight Center.
They practiced and soon, the show started. James saw Melissa in the front row and she blew a kiss to James. She was wearing a bulletproof vest and a motorcycle helmet. James blushed and blew a kiss to her back. During the show, James and Melissa kept looking at each other and smiling. The show was good and the audio cheered wildly. The final sendoff happened to more wild cheering and soon the show was over. James told Cake Cream and Axl that he wanted to hang out at the James L Knight Center by himself. Axl was like,"Let me guess. You're going to go hang out with your "Male Friend," again," Axl said wryly.
James blushed and shyly said,"Yes,"
Billy, Jimmy, Axl, Mike, and Andy were like,"Sure this isn't a boyfriend?"
James blushed shyly and said,"I'm sure."
Cake Cream and Axl chatted a little while longer with James and then they said their goodbyes with James and left.
Melissa came to James and they made out passionately. They were happy to be together again. After making out, James reluctantly said he had to go home.
Melissa made out with him one last time and then they said their goodbyes and James went back to the Luxurious Penthouse Suite and fell asleep.
The next day, they all got up and ate and got ready for the day. They chilled for most of the day and then James said,"I'm going to have dinner at Red Lobster by myself!"
Axl, Billy, Mike, Jimmy, and Andy were all like,"We're coming with you!" James, annoyed said,"What part of,"By Myself," don't you understand?"
Jimmy, Mike, Billy, Andy, and Mike reluctantly agreed to let James leave by himself. James smiled and put on a bulletproof vest and motorcycle helmet and left and went to Red Lobster. Melissa was his Waitress and he ordered a Surf And Turf(Sirloin and lobster tail) , mozzarella sticks, a Hurricane drink, coconut shrimp,some free water, a chocolate wave Cake. He got some free cheddar bay biscuits. Melissa and he smiled at each other happily. Melissa brought out his food and drinks and he ate happily. When Melissa brought the check, their hands briefly touched and they both blushed happily. James paid and Melissa and he chatted happily and then James left and went back to the Luxurious Penthouse Suite and fell asleep.
James awoke in the middle of the night to a feeling of great discomfort in his testicles.
Conerned, he googled it and .... WTF? Blue balls?
What an eye opener for a sexually naive young man: but it made sense.
The next day he told Melissa about his "problem" and wondered if she could help him out, to ease his pain?
"Sure thing" she said: "We'll go to my uncle's place and take care of it."
James smiled, thanked her and was welcomed.
They drove her clapped out B210 out in the country and pulled into the driveway of her uncle's farm; she parked behind the milking barn.
"Uncle Dave is a dairy man, and I know just the thing you need" Melissa smiled coquettishly.
She took James into a milking stall and said "Drop trou:" dazed and smiling, he did so.
"Now close your eyes..."
Whoa...Melissa hooked one of the milk machine suction tubes to James' turgid member, then hit the "ON" button: immediately James felt the most wonderful feeling...
A few minutes later James thanked her profusely, zipped up, and headed to the nearest farm equipment store, where he purchased a machine for at home use.
"Boy, will Cake Cream like this" he mused.
How right he was: not only did they like it, they dedicated their next album to its delights.
Axl was listening to FM radio during the evening when the program stopped, warning tones blared and a voice said "Our SETA telescopes have spotted what we can confirm is a large group of objects traveling toward earth at relativistic speeds. Analysis shows they are powered, made of materials unknown to us, and their speed continues to accelerate. They will be here in ten minutes. A direct collision seems inevitable. O, the humanity."
Axl told Cake Cream about it and they all went outside to watch the Big Event.
Soon the boyx saw a cluster of lights appear and seemingly grow bigger and bigger until they filled the sky, then...
Well, put it like this:
Q: What's the last thing to enter a bug's mind as it hits your windshield?
A: Its asshole.
RIP Axl; in memoriam:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BPgEgaPk62M
errata...S/v "SETI"
The next day, they got up and ate and got ready for the day.
James got a call from Melissa and he furtively answered it. James and Melissa had a flirty conversation. James blushed.
Cake Cream and Axl wondered what was going on with James.
After James conversation, Cake Cream and Axl were like,"When do we meet your Boyfriend?"
James blushed and said, He's just a regular Friend!"
Andy, Billy, and Axl were all like,"We're Gay, and we'll accept if you're Gay too."
Jimmy and Mike backed up Axl, Billy, and Andy.
James blushed and once again said that he and his male Friend were just Friends. James said,"I'm going to Red Lobster by myself!"
Jimmy, Axl, Mike, Billy, and Axl were all like,"You sure seem interested in going to Red Lobster by yourself all of a sudden."
James blushed.
Axl asked,"Do you and your Boyfriend have dates at Red Lobster?"
James blushed and said,"No."
Billy, Axl, Jimmy,Mike, and Andy all looked at each other knowingly. James didn't deny that he had a Boyfriend.
Jimmy, Axl, Billy, Mike, and Andy all were like,"You didn't deny that you have a boyfriend."
James looked at the ground, blushing shyly.
Axl, Jimmy, Mike, Billy, and Andy were like,"So, can we meet your Boyfriend?"
James shook his head and said,"No."
Axl, Jimmy, Mike,Billy, and Andy were all like,"We're your Friends, James, you should be able to introduce us to your Boyfriend."
James said,"He's just my Friend, really!"
Axl, James, Jimmy, Mike, and Andy were all like,"Can we meet your Friend then?"
James shook his head and said,"No."
Jimmy, Mike, Billy, Andy, and Axl were like,"James, are you ashamed of us, and that's why you don't want to introduce us to your male friend?"
James said,"I'm not ashamed of you guys. I'm proud of all of you."
Jimmy, Mike, Axl, Andy, and Billy were like,"What's the real reason you're so secretive about your male Friend?"
James said,"Would you guys mind your own business and stop grilling me as if I'm your teenaged child? I'm a grown man, not your teenaged child."
Jimmy, James, Mike, Billy, and Axl were even more interested in what was going on with James.
James said,"I'm going to Red Lobster by myself! Bye!" And put on a bulletproof vest and a motorcycle helmet and left and went to Red Lobster.
Jimmy, Mike, Billy, Axl, and Mike went to Red Lobster too. They wanted to see why James was so interested in going to Red Lobster by himself.
At Red Lobster, Melissa was James' Waitress and he ordered the Surf and Turf, Coconut Shrimp, a Hurricane drink, chocolate wave Cake, water, and got complimentary biscuits. James smiled and said to Melissa ,"I really like you." Melissa smiled and said,"I really like you too."
She soon brought out his food.
During Melissa's break, James and Melissa made out furtively. Jimmy, Mike, Billy, Andy, and Axl saw them making out and found out James' secret. James had a GIRLFRIEND, not a BOYFRIEND.
Melissa soon went to her break room.
Jimmy, Mike, Billy, Axl, and Andy went up behind James and Axl was like,"We'd like to pay your tab for you!"
James turned around and was stunned that Jimmy, Mike, Billy, Axl, and Andy were there, all smiling rakishly .
James was like,"You guys followed me to Red Lobster? What is wrong with you?"
Axl, Jimmy, Billy, Mike, and Andy were all like,"We were hungry and decided we were all in the mood for Red Lobster!"
James blushed shyly.
Axl, Andy, Mike, Jimmy, and Billy were like,"So, you really are by yourself, without your male Friend."
James laughed nervously.
Jimmy, Axl, Billy, Andy, and Mike were all like," Let's play a game. Let's tell each other the name of the last person we kissed. They all smiled rakishly at each other.
James was like," I REALLY don't want to play this game." He blushed uncomfortably.
Axl, Billy, Mike, Jimmy, and Andy were all like,"We're all Friends here, we should be able to play this game freely.
James said reluctantly,"Okay, I'm in."
Andy said,"The last person I kissed was my Ex Boyfriend, Sam.
Axl said,"The last person I kissed was my current Boyfriend, Billy."
Billy said,"The last person I kissed was my current Boyfriend, Axl."
Mike said,"The last person I kissed was my ex girlfriend, Tammy.
Jimmy said,"The last person I kissed was my ex girlfriend, Allison."
James lied and said,"The last person I kissed was my one night stand, Allison."
Jimmy, Mike, Billy, Axl, and Andy all looked at each other and James knowingly.
Axl said,"One of us just told a lie in this game. Anyone want to confess to being the liar?" Axl said,"I didn't lie." Jimmy said,"I didn't lie." Billy said, "I didn't lie." Mike said,"I didn't lie."Andy said,"I didn't lie." James just answered,"No." To the question,"Anyone want to confess to being the liar?"
Andy, Mike, Billy, Jimmy, and Axl were all like,"James, you just answered,"No," when the rest of us answered ,"I didn't lie." Do you want to tell us anything?"
James responded blushing shyly,"No."
Axl asked,"James, do you promise to God that Allison was the last person you kissed?"
Jimmy, Mike, Andy, Billy, and Axl all smirked knowingly at James. They knew Melissa was the last person James kissed. And that James would be committing a major sin by lying to God. James stomach turned into a bunch of knots. He knew he couldn't lie to God.
James responded,"No."
Axl asked,"Was the last person you kissed your male Friend?"
James responded," I didn't kiss my male Friend."
Mike said, "That Melissa Waitress is very cute and nice. I think I'll go ask her out!"
James reflexively said,"Mike please don't ask Melissa out! Melissa's my Girlfriend!" James then gasped aloud at what he just said. James couldn't believe he just confessed to he and Melissa's relationship.
Jimmy, Mike, Billy, Andy, and Axl smirked knowingly. James FINALLY admitted that Melissa was his Girlfriend.
Jimmy, Mike, Billy, Axl, and Andy were all like,"We already knew that Melissa is your Girlfriend. We saw you and her kiss, which is why we played this impromptu "Who was the last person you kissed game?" On you.
James blushed shyly.
"So, Melissa's been your "Male Friend," all along." Axl said." Billy, Mike, Andy, and Jimmy all smirked knowingly.
James responded shyly. "Yes."
Jimmy, Axl, Andy, Mike, Billy all smirked knowingly.
Melissa's break was over and she asked Billy, Mike, Jimmy, Andy, and Axl if they were ready to order.
Jimmy,Mike, Andy, Axl, and Billy all smirked knowingly at Melissa and were all like," Welcome to our Family, Melissa."
Melissa was confused.
Axl said, "We saw you and James kiss. We know that you guys are dating." Jimmy, Andy, Mike, and Billy all backed up Axl.
Melissa and James both admitted they were dating.
Axl, Billy, Jimmy, Mike, and Andy smiled. They ordered mozzarella sticks, Hurricanes, Admiral Feast, and chocolate wave Cake, free water. They ate and paid, having a nice meal. They also paid for James' meal too. James thanked them. Melissa smiled at all of them. They all smiled back. They chatted amicably with Melissa and vice versa and then left. Soon, they went back to the Luxurious Penthouse Suite and chilled.
My god, they've been resurrected.
The Second Coming.
---> Evergreens Cemetery.Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterV
https://anagram-solver.net/%20My%20g....?partial=true
Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterV
Quote:
A 2010 survey showed that about 40% of Americans believe that Jesus is likely to return by 2050. This varies from 58% of white evangelical Christians, through 32% of Catholics to 27% of white mainline Protestants. Belief in the Second Coming was popularised in the US in the late nineteenth century by the evangelist Dwight L. Moody and the premillennial interpretation became one of the core components of Christian fundamentalism in the 1920s.
Axl shook his head to rid himself of the cobwebs and asked "Where am I?"
He and the boyz of Cake Cream were seated on antique Chippendale chairs in an all white waiting room; no one was at the desk.
A rumble permeated the air, and a truly monstrous figure entered and glared at them, then said "Are you ready?"
"Ready for what?"
"Why, to be judged, silly. What, did you think you were here to audition for America's Got Talent?"
Axl farted in fear, as did his henchmen: hello, Hershey squirts.
Timidly, the doppelganger asked "Are we auditioning for something? Where the hell are we?"
The ogre reached into her hideous handbag, drew out a document and displayed it: 'twas the story of their lives.
"You're in purgatory, bub, aka limbo, and you're about to be judged."
Confused, Axl queried "Purgatory...Colorado?"
The beast let loose a cloud-shaking blast of flatulence, vomited up lunch and said "Fuck no, this is your judgment day."
'Twas brillig, and the slithey tove did gimble and gyre out the door.
The lads waited, and waited, until finally THE BIG GUY entered the room, wrapped in clouds, festooned in glory.
Cake Cream and Axl aren't dead, I just decided to continue the story after putting the story on a brief hiatus because my main supporter on the other website permanently left in solidarity of a bullied poster. Mr. V encouraged me to keep going, so I decided to make a brand new Chapter today. :) Thank you, Mr. V! :)
Now that the cat was out of the bag, the boyz of Cake Cream pounced.
"We want to watch the two of you make out and screw" said Axl.
"OK" said Melissa, "but you'll need to leave me a generous tip when we're done."
The boyz all nodded their heads, shook each other's hands and farted melodiously.
Rather than "do it" in bed, James, Melissa and Cake Cream decided the living room carpet was best; they were soon building the beast with two backs while the boyz watched; inflamed with lust Cake Cream engaged in a circle jerk.
Soon things ended, ebbed, and calmed down; Melissa was "tipped" ten million dollars; she thanked the boyz and was welcomed.
"OK guys, do you want this to be a regular thing?"
They nodded in unison and farted the tune to Dean Martin's "That's Amore."
In the Luxurious Penthouse Suite, Jimmy asked James why he was hiding Melissa from Cake Cream and Axl. Mike, Billy, Andy, and Axl wanted to know too.
James responded,"Because I was worried that you would want to get revenge on me by having sex with Melissa like I had sex with Allison."
Jimmy said,"I'd never break your heart by having sex with Melissa. And besides, you quickly realized what a huge mistake having sex with Allison was and feel absolutely horrible about having sex with Allison, and refused to ever have sex with her again. I'm not going to get revenge on you by having sex with Melissa."
James smiled skeptically.
Axl pointed out that everybody signed a contract stating that they were all forbidden from having sex with each other's boyfriends and girlfriends.
James smiled more genuinely. James got a call from Melissa and he happily answered it. Melissa and James flirted happily with each other and gave each other kisses over the phone. They chatted more and then both said their goodbyes and hung up.
Cake Cream and Axl watched TV and soon fell asleep.
The next day, they got up and ate and got ready for the day. Cake Cream Fans were clamoring for a new Cake Cream show soon.
Cake Cream and Axl were working for the Fans and they obliged. They put on bulletproof vests and motorcycle helmets went to the James L Knight Center and booked a show for tomorrow. Fans were happy. Cake Cream and Axl went to the movies, went to the zoo, went to the park, and went to a Restaurant. They had a fun day and went back to the Luxurious Penthouse Suite and chilled more.
On Social Media, Blue Bell ice cream, Homemade Vanilla was trending on Google, Facebook, YouTube, Instagram, Snapchat, Tiktok, and Twitter. Cake Cream Fans were buying a LOT of Blue Bell ice cream, Homemade Vanilla because Axl had said in an interview that he told Jimmy he would buy him Blue Bell ice cream, Homemade Vanilla if he didn't hit James at that Cake Cream show when James and Jimmy were still feuding over Allison. Homemade Vanilla from Blue Bell was flying off store shelves. It was a frenzy.
Cake Cream and Axl couldn't believe that Blue Bell Homemade Vanilla was getting so popular because of what Axl said off the cuff in that interview. Axl for fun ordered Homemade Vanilla from Blue Bell and it was delivered. He gave it to Jimmy with a rakish smile and Jimmy accepted, with a happy blush. Jimmy gave some to James, Billy, Andy, Mike, himself and Axl and they all enjoyed the delicious Homemade Vanilla. Axl asked Jimmy, remember the ice cream you, me, Andy, Mike, and Billy had when Billy, I, Mike, and Andy were trying to cheer you up when you and James were first feuding over Allison?"
Jimmy shyly said,"I remember that." Everyone blushed shyly.
James blushed even deeper and said,"I'm truly sorry for having sex with Allison. I never should have done that."
Jimmy responded,"I know you're sorry about having sex with Allison."
James smiled at Jimmy.
Jimmy smiled back and added,"And now you have your own girlfriend who you are happy with."
James smiled and said,"I really like Melissa. She's nice, sweet, beautiful. I'm really glad I found her."
Jimmy smiled and said,"You deserve to be happy."
James was so happy that Jimmy had forgiven him for having sex with Allison. James once again couldn't believe he had temporarily thrown away a good brotherly friendship with Jimmy, someone he had known for YEARS, over a temporary fling he had just met. That was already over.
Axl was glad that Jimmy and James had patched their broken friendship. Axl still felt a little resentful about Andy trying to sell him out for $5,000/$1,000 when he was on the run, but he knew Andy felt bad about that, and Andy did help save Older Axl's life by distracting Mark Riley with the kiss so that Axl could take Mark's gun and make him leave Older Axl alone, so it kind of balanced out. Axl still felt a little resentful of Andy for stealing 1.6 Billion from Cake Cream, but at least he paid back all the money he stole plus extra as a sign of contrition.
Andy went up to Axl and said,"I truly love you, like a Brother."
Axl smiled and said"I love you too, like a brother."
Andy smiled. Andy said,"In fact, I love all of you guys like Brothers."
Everyone else said,"We all love you too Andy, like Brothers."
They chilled more, enjoying more Homemade Vanilla ice cream and soon fell asleep.
Melissa knocked on the door of Cake Cream's luxurious penthouse suite: "Surprise!" she exclaimed as the door opened.
Axl noted that Melissa was wearing the classic black Las Vegas Strip weekend "party/night on the town" short, clinging dress and she had a companion, tethered to a rope.
"Guys, this is Dolly."
The lads passed gas to the tune of "Hello Dolly."
"James, you can have me all to yourself, and I brought Dolly for Cake Cream: should be better than a circle jerk."
The fog of uncertainty slowly changed to the furrow of realization on the collective brow of Cake Cream; the boyz all smiled, then laughed, and wound up high-fiving one another, doing hand springs, splits, and of course hand stands.
As before James and his lady-love started grinding it out on the living room floor: it was her "time of the month" and the guys watched in awe and then applauded madly as James earned his red wings.
While James laid pipe Andy thought "fuck ewe" so he did so, and he really, really liked it.
Cake Cream had marveled at the similarity between Melissa's love slit and Dolly's: ah, the mysteries of nature.
Soon all the lads had tried their "hand" and couldn't stop discussing how much fun it had been.
"Who needs a bossy woman when you can have Dolly?" exclaimed Mike.
"Think of the money we can save" realized Jimmy.
The tryst completed, the lads decided that Dolly really should stay with them; they contacted mgt. and a crew was dispatched to turn one of the rooms in the luxurious suite into a straw-filled manger.
Melissa was tipped an extra ten million for having thoughtfully brought Dolly along: she thanked the boyz, was welcomed, shook hands and left.
Dolly munched away, ruminating only about how she really missed that guy who'd spotted her from his Newell while driving by a few years ago and then drillied her with 9 1/2 inches.
What ever happens to guys like that?
Mr. V, you missed an opportunity to have do something with the Homemade Vanilla ice cream from Blue Bell! :D Besides, Axl, Billy, and Andy are GAY so they wouldn't be having sex with Dolly in the first place. ;) Would have been better if you said only Jimmy and Mike had sex with Dolly since they are both Straight. ;)
No Tasha, you got it all wrong.
Sheep pussy is akin to a human male's asshole the same as it is akin to a human woman's vagina.
Sort of like a unisex bathroom.
It's one of the little mysteries which god has foisted upon we mere mortals.
Gay or straight, one size fits all.
Where do you think the expression "On the lamb" came from, eh?
Gay men who insist on doing it "old school" still have the classic suggestion to "fuck ewe asshole."
Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterV
I thought Dolly in your version was a human WOMAN,I didn't know she was a SHEEP. :eek: Cake Cream and Axl are not into Bestiality!
Any port in a storm, my dear...any port in a storm.Quote:
Originally Posted by Tasha
Inflamed with desire over watching James and Melissa seeking conjugal bliss, the boyz will use any surrogate in search of nirvana.
It's what we men are wont to do.
You being inexperienced in the ways of love simply haven't seen how the world REALLY works.
Try this: go to a bar and ask a drunken man if he'd fuck a sheep: hello, ice breaker!
Cake Cream and Axl could just MASTERBATE, rather than go fuck a sheep!! Or go fuck socks like you had them doing in your retellings not so long ago...Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterVAny port in a storm, my dear...any port in a storm.Quote:
Originally Posted by Tasha
Inflamed with desire over watching James and Melissa seeking conjugal bliss, the boyz will use any surrogate in search of nirvana.
It's what we men are wont to do.
You being inexperienced in the ways of love simply haven't seen how the world REALLY works.
Try this: go to a bar and ask a drunken man if he'd fuck a sheep: hello, ice breaker!
The next day, they got up and ate and got ready for the day. The Cake Cream show was a morning Show, so they put on bulletproof vests and motorcycle helmets and went to the James L Knight Center and practiced and soon the show started behind bulletproof plexiglass barriers. The Show was really good. The audience cheered wildly and Cake Cream and Axl were all happy.
The final sendoff happened and then the show was over. Cake Cream and Axl went to Denny's and had a nice meal and paid and left. They went back to the Luxurious Penthouse Suite and all went to sleep.
When they got up later, they checked Social Media and it was discovered that Tommy's selfie with Axl from Axl's second day of time travel when he still had red hair before dying it black was going viral. Tommy had the ONLY selfie of Axl with red hair in 2022 and Fans were offering Tommy a LOT of money to sell it to them, like $100,000.
Tommy cherished that Selfie with Axl a lot. It was one of his favorite selfies in the world. He wanted to keep it, especially since it was so valuable to him. But $100,000 was awfully tempting. Tommy's stomach turned into knots. He was sure that Axl wouldn't want him to sell that selfie for money, and he did love that selfie a lot, but once again, $100,000 sounded so good.
Axl wished that Tommy wouldn't sell that selfie. He made that Selfie for Tommy and Tommy only. Axl had no idea the frenzy that would occur over that selfie when he took that selfie with Tommy his second day of time traveling. Axl would be extremely disappointed in Tommy if he sold that selfie.
Axl put on his bulletproof vest and motorcycle helmet and went back to Denny's and spoke to Tommy directly.
Tommy, please don't sell that first Selfie of me and you. I did that selfie for YOU, not anyone else."
Tommy said,"I cherish that first Selfie of us. It's very valuable to me, but the money's very tempting. I could use $100,000. I'm torn on what to do "
Axl said,"I'll tell you what. I'll pay you $200,000 to NOT sell that first Selfie. You get to keep the cherished Selfie and you're $200,000 richer."
Tommy said,"You'd really do that for me?" Tommy smiled happily.
Axl smiled and said,"Yes. That first Selfie is very special to me too, it's the first Selfie I did for a Fan my second day of time travel when I still had red hair."
Tommy said,"Okay, deal. I didn't want to sell the first Selfie in the first place."
Axl smiled and drew up a Contract that stated that Tommy promised that he wouldn't sell the first Selfie. Tommy read, understood, agreed, and signed and Axl Zelled him $200,000." Tommy thanked him and Axl welcomed him. Axl and Tommy chatted for a while and then said their goodbyes and Axl left and went to the Luxurious Penthouse Suite.
Tommy said on Social Media,"I promise I am not selling the first Selfie of Young Axl in 2022. It's too important and valuable to me. "
Axl was glad that Tommy was keeping up his deal. Cake Cream and Axl chatted happily. On Social Media, ALMOST everyone that Axl had met his first days of time travel spoke about how nice Axl was. Only Brian Washington mentioned about Axl punching him in the face for following, harassing, stalking, and snapping pictures of him, but he added that Axl was being polite to him at FIRST until Brian kept doing that.
Ashley and Tommy from the hotel Axl stayed at his first few days of time travel mentioned they thought it was weird that Axl supposedly was from Alaska and claimed he was from both Juneau and Anchorage, two different Alaskan cities that are VERY far away from each other, but they also talked about how nice Axl was. Thomas from Denny's, blushed, remembering that Axl told him he was from Juneau, Anchorage too, and how he immediately knew that Axl was lying.
Cake Cream asked Axl why he chose to claim that he was from Juneau, Anchorage.
Axl shyly responded,"I chose to falsely claim that I was from Juneau, Anchorage because I was paranoid that if I admitted I was REALLY from Los Angeles with a hometown of Lafayette, People would figure out that I was Axl Rose who had time traveled to 2022 from 1987."
Cake Cream were like,"Makes sense."
Axl smiled at all of them.
Cake Cream were all like,"We're glad you time traveled to 2022 and are here with us. We all love you."
Axl smiled and said,"I'm glad I time traveled to 2022 and am with you guys too. I love all of you too."
Cake Cream smiled too. Andy felt another pang of guilt about him trying to sell out Axl for $1,000 when Axl was a Fugitive on the run and hiding out in Billy's house, and for stealing the $1.6 Billion from Cake Cream, after abandoning them so he wouldn't have to share any of his Lottery win with them.
Axl saved his life even after he knew Andy tried to sell him out for $1,000 and all of them tried to warn Andy that his life was about to be in danger even after he had stolen 1.6 Billion from Cake Cream. Andy was lucky he had such a loving Family with Billy, James, Jimmy, Mike, and Axl. He couldn't believe he betrayed them for 1.6 Billion and tried to betray Axl for $1,000.
They chilled and went to sleep.
The next morning Axl was shocked to see on social media that Tommy was selling the selfie via online auction.
Axl angrily drew up up legal papers, filed a lawsuit, and dragged Tommy into court.
The irascible jurist, the epitome of swagger, Judge V, was assigned the case; he fortified his resolve by inhaling a gram of Peruvian flake, removed his bailiff's mouth from his cock, and majestically entered the courtroom to the tune of "Here Come Da Judge" played by his clerk on a kazoo.
"Aha" said the arbiter, "What calumny are we dealing with today?"
"Judge V, Tommy breached a contract we had when he auctioned off our selfie. The plaintiff rests."
Judge V scratched his scabid balls, wishing he had an ice pick, yawned, then turned to Tommy: "And what is your testimony?"
"Judge V, the contract is void and unenforceable, Axl did not dot all his "i's" and cross all his 'T's."
The contract was admitted into evidence and the whacked out jurist stared at it through eyes the size of tea cups.
"By thunder you are correct, sir. Look here: two "i'S" are not dotted, and over here a "t" has not been crossed."
Axl sagged in upon himself: he knew the Sword of Damocles was about to descend.
"I rule for Tommy. Axl, you once again wasted our time and the time of this good citizen here by trying to act as your own attorney when in fact you are a clueless dolt. Judgment for defendant. Axl, pay him two billion in damages."
Axl frowned, took the bills out of his wallet and paid the man.
Post-trial, Judge V and Tommy met again in the judge's lair to divvy up the dough; a billion bucks and a nose full of blow: not bad for a day's work.
I wonder in real life how much that first Selfie of Axl from his second day of time travel would REALLY be worth in real life. :) I mean, he still had red hair in that first Selfie, and he literally only had red hair for only TWO days in 2022, so an only ONE selfie with him with red hair and it being the FIRST Selfie he ever did for a fan in 2022, that would be a valuable collector's item in real life. :)
Axl slinked back to the Luxurious Penthouse Suite and was tickled unmercifully by the Boyz: "Thanks, I needed that" he moaned, then went online.Quote:
Originally Posted by Tasha
He was just in time to see the conclusion of the online auction of the selfie; rather than turn it off he watched with morbid curiosity.
His mouth dropped when he saw the final hammer price... two bucks.
The buyer was interviewed and said "Yeah, it was only worth two bucks; the guy is way too overexposed."
Axl smacked his forehead and gathered Cake Cream around him.
"Lads, we're overexposed>"
Andy looked down at his crotch and realized he'd forgotten again to put on pants.
"Not you, Andy: Cake Cream. And I have a plan..."
He outlined his plan and the boyz hooted like apes, scratched themselves, ate bananas, farted a Tarzan yell and hurled their feces before collapsing: a happy time.
Cake Cream decamped from the Luxurious Penthouse Suite and boarded a slow boat to China.
"We'll arrive at Hong Kong in three years" announced Axl; "Maybe by then our overexposure will be moot."
Andy looked at himself again, sans pants, and said "I'm not sure about that."
Mr. V, you've done it again. I have been hatching a Chapter for a LONG time where people wonder if Cake Cream is overrated, and Axl says something like,"Cake Cream is UNDERRATED because Cake Cream were only did Opening Acts and gigs at Restaurants, Bars, Nightclubs, etc until this year, and Cake Cream was established in 2018, four years ago."
Three years passed as the Boyz rowed, rowed, and rowed their way to Hong Kong.
Upon arrival they contacted an arena to arrange a booking but were rebuffed: "No speakee de English" snickered Hop Sing as he slurped noodles.
He spoke English, but wouldn't to the scruffy lot standing before him, all now festooned with Pop-eye sized forearms and biceps.
They moved on, but it was clear that nobody knew who they were or cared to book them.
"Well boyz, we gotta go back to Miami."
Andy, sans pants as usual, let fly a tuneful fart of appreciation; they got back on the tramp steamer and rowed, rowed, rowed their way back toward Miami.
Two years and eleven months later (thank you, favorable currents) they arrived, only to find Miami had been reduced to a wasteland.
They asked onei of the million homeless what had happened; "When Desantis didn't get elected he destroyed Florida."
There were no Luxurious Penthouse Suites to be found for love nor money, so they got back on the old rust bucket.
"Where we headed, cap'n?" asked Axl.
"Odessa, to deliver our cargo of high explosives."
Destination in hand, the boyz thanked the cap'n, were welcomed, shook his hand and Paragon shuffled their way up the gangway toward their oars.
Odessa. Final destination. What could go wrong?
Funny how you mentioned that Axl is the Captain of the Cake Cream boat. About a year ago, I also wrote,"Cake Cream was like a messed up ship and Axl was the Captain of this messed up Cake Cream Ship!" LMAO! :D
*sigh*Quote:
Originally Posted by Tasha
I never mentioned that.
I did write " "Where we headed, cap'n?" asked Axl."
Fact is, it was a very old Greek trieme transported through time with its captain, same as Axl was.
Okay, my bad. :) I read it as,"Where we headed, Cap'n?" Cake Cream asked Axl. :)Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterV*sigh*Quote:
Originally Posted by Tasha
I never mentioned that.
I did write " "Where we headed, cap'n?" asked Axl."
Fact is, it was a very old Greek trieme transported through time with its captain, same as Axl was.
I have some promising news. :) The person who left because he was being bullied came back under a new Account. He said he didn't know my Main Supporter was going to leave in solidarity with him. Now that he's back, maybe, just maybe my Main Supporter will be back too. :)
Does your supporter happened to be named "Jacques Strapp?"
LMAO! :D No. She's a Woman named Wendi. ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterV
Tasha, now I think I see why you stopped posting the Axl stuff: he's being sued for sexual assault!
Bad Axl!
"Rose was accused of sexual assault by former Penthouse model Sheila Kennedy, who claims that Rose attacked and raped her in a New York hotel room in 1989."
Maybe you can weave that into the next chapter of your narrative, that is if you can tear yourself away from the casinos.
His fans are hankering to learn the truth, and who is better than YOU to promulgate it?
Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterV
I am actually writing a new Chapter, one that deals with someone from Axl's past who wants to get into Axl's good graces. ;)
The next day, they got up and ate and got ready for the day. James got a call from Melissa and they flirted and chatted happily. Axl, Jimmy, Mike, Billy, and Andy were happy to see James so happy.
James and Melissa said their goodbyes and hung up.
Axl, Billy, Mike, James, Jimmy, and Andy all chatted happily. On Social Media, Cake Cream Fans were clamoring for a new Cake Cream Show soon.
Cake Cream and Axl went to the James L Knight Center and booked a Cake Cream show for tomorrow. Fans were happy. Cake Cream and Axl went to the movies and had a good time, eating popcorn and drinking coke and enjoying the movies they watched. After the movies, they had lunch at the food court. Fans asked for selfies and autographs and they all obliged. The fans were happy. They all chatted for a little while and then the Fans walked away.
After lunch, Cake Cream and Axl went to the zoo. They had fun at the zoo and then went to the Luxurious Penthouse Suite and chilled. They went to sleep.
The next day, it was time to get ready for the Cake Cream Show. They ate and got ready for the day. They put on bulletproof vests and motorcycle helmets and went to the James L Knight Center and 4,000 Cake Cream Fans showed up. Cake Cream and Axl were happy. The show started and it was really good. The Fans cheered wildly. The final sendoff happened to more wild cheering and the show was over soon.
After the show, Cake Cream and Axl were leaving. Stephen Bailey, Axl's abusive Stepfather walked up to them.
Stephen said,"Hi, Axl, it's me, your Stepfather, Stephen Bailey."
Axl's painful memories of Stephen's abuse came rushing back to him and he wanted to punch out Stephen's lights out, but knew he wouldn't look good, a 25 year old punching out a man in his late 80's.
"What do you want, Stephen?" Axl asked in a curt tone.
Stephen said,"I just want to make amends with you, Axl, it's been a long time."
Axl bitterly asked,"Why would I want to make amends with you? You abused me when I was a helpless child!"
Stephen said,"I'm really sorry about the abuse I did to you when you were a child."
Axl said curtly,"Sorry isn't going to cut it. You fucked me up badly."
Stephen said,"Can't we let bygones be bygones?" Stephen looked at Axl imploringly.
Axl said,"Let me call Older Axl and let's see how HE feels about you," Axl said in a guarded tone.
Stephen said,"Okay."
Axl called Older Axl and said,"Stephen Bailey is here and wants to make amends for the abuse he did to us. How do you feel about that?
Older Axl said,"Stephen Bailey, our Stepfather is with you?
Axl said,"Yes."
Older Axl said,"Ask him for his phone number. I want it.
Axl asked Stephen for his phone number, stating that Older Axl wanted it. Stephen gave it to Axl. Axl gave it to called Older Axl and asked him if he was willing to make amends with him for the abuse he did to both Axls. Stephen's phone was put on speaker.
Older Axl said,"You know, you really fucked up me and Young Axl. You ought to be ashamed of yourself."
Axl said,"Older Axl is right."
Stephen once again said he was sorry.
Cake Cream could see the turmoil on Axl's face. Cake Cream suggested that Stephen and Axl do a Rocking Rick interview and talk it out. Stephen and Axl thought that wasn't too bad of an idea and Older Axl thought so too. Stephen, Axl, and Older Axl chatted tersely and then Older Axl said goodbye to Axl and Stephen and they said it back.
Stephen said to Axl," Wow, you've grown so much."
Axl said,"Yeah, the last time you saw me, I was a TEENAGER. I'm 25 now, so it's no surprise that I'm grown now." Axl gave Stephen an intense glare.
Stephen chuckled uneasily. The tension between Stephen and Axl was palpable.
Cake Cream suggested that Stephen, Axl, and Young Axl go to dinner together at Denny's.
Stephen and Axl were on board and Cake Cream, Stephen, and Axl went to Denny's.
Stephen and Axl awkwardly chatted about Axl's childhood and teenage years.
Stephen said,"Remember when you were 15 and you played piano for your talent show and won first place?"
Axl said,"I had a Great time at that Talent Show but you beat me afterwards because you didn't think playing piano was going to pay the bills when I grew up. You didn't think Piano playing was going to be a successful. You wanted me to work in Construction." Axl angrily glared at Stephen.
Stephen awkwardly laughed. This tension between Stephen and Axl was REALLY uncomfortable.
Cake Cream could tell Axl was breaking. Cake Cream were like," Let's talk about current events, Stephen and Axl."
Axl and Stephen were like,"Okay."
Axl said,"It's a lovely, clear night."
Stephen said,"You're right."
Axl said,"I'm Cake Cream's Lawyer, Manager, Mentor, Backing Singer, Power Of Attorney, Friend, Billy's Boyfriend." Cake Cream backed up Axl
Stephen said,"You've done really well for yourself."
Axl said,"Thank you," in a guarded tone. Stephen awkwardly welcomed him.
Their food and drinks arrived and Axl had ordered three glasses of Coke. Axl ate and drank the Cokes . Cake Cream knew that Axl excessively drinking Coke meant he was feeling stressed.
Stephen said,"Axl, should you REALLY be drinking so much Coke? That's not healthy."
Axl said," Mind your own business, Stephen, I'm a grown man, not a Child or a Teen!" In a cranky tone.
Cake Cream was like,"You might want to listen to Axl, Stephen."
Stephen agreed to mind his own business. Cake Cream, Axl, and Stephen finished eating and drinking and paid and left. Stephen and Axl awkwardly said their goodbyes and Cake Cream and Stephen awkwardly said their goodbyes. Cake Cream and Axl went to the Luxurious Penthouse Suite and soon fell asleep.
The following morning a bell hop delivered a message to Axl from Stephen.
"Axl: As you know I am a chemist; last night I slipped a potion I concocted into your coke; unless you take the antidote which only I can provide you will die a slow, painful death. If you want to live meet me at Motel Blu on Biscayne Blvd. at three this afternoon. Come alone, and NO COPS or else. Bring ten million in unmarked twenties."
Axl shook his head: the abuse was continuing.
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheGrimReaperThere is nothing wrong with your television set. Do not attempt to adjust the picture. We are controlling transmission. If we wish to make it louder, we will bring up the volume.
It is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition, and it lies between the pit of man's fears and the summit of his knowledge. In the dimension-42 of outer space. It is an area that we call, Tasha's imagination.
The spine tingling adventure continues as ... the SEQUEL/PREQUEL.
Coming to a theatre of the mind near you before Christmas, 2022.
There is nothing wrong with your television set. Do not attempt to adjust the picture. We are controlling transmission. If we wish to make it louder, we will bring up the volume.Quote:
Originally Posted by TheGrimReaper
PREVIOUSLY on One A-hole at a Time ...
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheGrimReaper
Now, the PREQUEL ...
After watching those two loonie "tunes" on the tv, for some time, A1 and A2 decided to permanently part ways, but, from Earth. So, they both climbed into the time machine, hidden in a homeless community in Portland, to go back to an earlier time, one before the age of television. Nay, they had to drive some poor schmuck's pick-up truck through it to make it work, which they stole that morning, but, which necessarily remained behind at the Portland portal after they went through, with only organic matter being able to pass through. Quite randomly, they selected a small planet called Arkanar, far away from the electromagnetic influences of Earth. A wonderfully bucolic planet with beautiful people, at least until shortly after they arrived. So, they made a pact, between themselves, to forever remain. Next, they set fire to the time machine. Most unusually though, even weirdly, was that they inadvertently carried the Covid-19 virus along with them (not to mention a bag full of dead frogs from who knew where) back through time, which brought a quick, and devastating, change to both the planet and its people. You see, according to doctor Redietz, from Penn. State, such diseases generally become much less aggressive over time, and, but, so, to almost instantly bring it back a few centuries created a wholly new and 99.999% lethal variant of the disease - but not of course for A1 or A2 because their vaccine protection thus automatically proportionately increased. But, without the technology, understanding, or even the parts, to begin to rebuild the time machine, they were stranded. One remarked to the other, "Gee it's hard to be a god." However, years after the "revived" Covid-19 lifted without a trace, or at least lay dormant - but with its effect too much for the planet and its people - a new bunch of space travelers from Earth stumbled on their schematics for the prototype for the time machine, and, coincidentally, stumbled upon the planet, Arkanar. But, they would not acknowledge A1 or A2, who had become quite elderly, by then. There was no convincing them that they were once rock stars, from Earth, or, that Arkanar was once such a planet of such people. By then, they fit in with the other antics of the planet, Arkanar. Most unusually though, even weirdly, was that one of the latest time travelers later inadvertently carried the Covid-19 virus back along with him, to Earth. So, in the end, the virus was neither man, nor monkey, -made after all, but a product of a temporal loop created in the gambling imagination of a tv character named, Tasha.
Now, the SEQUEL ...
In any event, to return to the story, the sequel part, fortunately a bit shorter. Similarly, most unusually though, even weirdly, was that all of that time travel inadvertently opened an extraterrestrial time-signature, or latent wormhole, beacon on high to the planet Earth, for any and every tom-dick-and-harry piece of space shit out there. Some, possibly, already on this very forum. Which gave rise, nay, will give rise, to the real Borg, Body Snatchers, Wraith (of Stargate Atlantis), Steven Hawking's aliens (to be feared), and, so on, and even to some guy who will copy the words, "Talk to the Hand," from a young man with a V in his name who was sore at somebody (with a bit of bird shit all over him) for repeatedly beating him at his own good game. Not much hope for mankind, now, given that our best defense is the mouth of easily offended effeminate Monet, and, his grateful sidekick, but lout, the Tablepooey. (Ha.)
And, so it was, with the advent of the "winter storm of the century" upon us, now, the prophecy of the SEQUEL is about to be fulfilled. Watch out!!!
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46 ---------------> 46 = (-1 + 47) ---> 147, or 741.
Which goes with another Irishman's song called,Quote:
Text HOME to 741741 from anywhere in the United States, anytime. Crisis Text Line is here for any crisis. A live, trained Crisis Counselor [aka EvenBob] receives the text and responds, all from our secure online platform. The volunteer Crisis Counselor will help you move from a hot moment to a cool moment.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D_P-v1BVQn8
Time of 3:34 ---> (1 + 333) ---> 1/333 = 1/√9√9√9 ---> 666.
Coincidentally, with 432K likes = (2 X 6*6*6)K likes ---> 666_666.
It is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition, and it lies between the pit of man's fears and the summit of his knowledge. In the dimension-37 of outer space. It is an area that we call, MrV's reality.
The spine tingling adventure continues as ... the DENOUEMENT.
Coming to a theater of the mind not near you, before New Year's, 2024.
Mr. V, my Fictional Axl Rose has a criminal record. Would he be able to be a Lawyer in real life? I don't feel like looking it up on Google. I'm pretty sure that someone who has a criminal record wouldn't be able to be a Lawyer, but I could be wrong.
Hi Tasha.
I saved you the thirty seconds...
"Almost all states will license people with criminal records to become attorneys, though some have extra restrictions of which you should be aware. Only three states explicitly forbid persons with felony convictions from becoming lawyers in the state: Texas, Kansas, and Mississippi."
So yeah, in Florida Axl can be admitted to the state bar.
Thanks. :) Good to know that my Fictional Axl Rose can become a Lawyer even with his criminal record. :)Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterV
What was his felony?
My Fictional Axl criminal record is going to jail for about five hours for punching a Paparazzi stalker in the face and breaking his camera(Assault and property damage). He was bailed out after about 5 hours through a GoFundMe. :) In Court, he paid the Paparazzi Stalker $200,000 in a Court Settlement. :)Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterV
Going to jail for less than an hour for claiming he tried to smuggle Cocaine to Mero, Mainos(Billy had actually tried to smuggle the Cocaine to Mero, Mainos and Axl claimed he was the smuggler). He paid his bail himself within an hour. :) In his court case, he plead guilty to Cocaine smuggling, but the Prosecutor checked his fingerprints and realized Axl was not the smuggler. Cake Cream and Axl all pleaded the fifth on who the true Cocaine Smuggler was and they were all banned from Mero, Mainos.
V turned out another KJ. Ha.
In reality, the true reality, the truth can't be so strange as fiction. And, so, the following is much more of a straight-up psychedelic documentary of MrV's reality than a complicated unbounded adventure of Tasha's imagination.
The story, all names, characters, and incidents portrayed in this production are fictitious. No identification with actual persons (living or deceased), places, buildings, and products is intended or should be inferred.
PREVIOUSLY, in the SEQUEL of One A-hole at a Time ...
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheGrimReaper
Quote:
From December 21 to 26, 2022, a historic extratropical or extraterrestrial cyclone created crippling winter storm conditions, including blizzards, high winds, snowfall, or record cold temperatures across the majority of the United States and parts of Canada.
Now, the DENOUEMENT, Act 1 ...
In reality, all, but none, of the past, and future, events above happened, and, or, were to happen. Pretty prophetic, indeed.
The extraterrestrials were already here, but only in a vicarious sense, and, it was the "winter storm of the century" that unusually though, weirdly, abruptly, but not, terminated their mind-meld on the world. In particular, extending from the Portland portal. The last such winter storm possible, as if by the Hand of God, Himself, because of the worsening global warming. And, so, the last twenty ears were only a nightmarish dream, which culminated in the creation of the VCT forum, itself, from which MrV became a focal point. A bold brainwashing of the people of Earth, by the Planet-7, of the eVil's - read as the evil V's - under the guise of reality. For the eVil's, from the comfort of their distant alien homes, to relish in almost every one on Earth to aimlessly strive for the mythical "brass ring" or Holy Grail. Furthermore, an ugly replacement reality to entice everyone to seek out such validation on the internet, from the isolation of their own homes. The eVil's asserted quite a thus grip, on the hearts and minds of the people of the Earth, with relay transmitters from the four corners of the United States, which radiated from their home-away-from-home base, in Portland, which was manned by surrogate-0, nay, patient-0, an unsuspecting schlep already named MrV. Unusually though, weirdly, MrV, who had a natural knack for stirring the pot, was easy pickin's for the real eVil's. Young, alone, heading west with an open mind, an affirmed graduate of Andy's Gang, the alcoholic pothead, MrV, became their Earthly leader incarnate. However, MrV had no idea that they had already taken over his life, in his climb to the top of the divorce legal profession. So, when it was time for him to strike, like a sleeper-cell awakened, he blindly followed their subliminal instructions, the reason that MrV, himself, later, after the "winter storm of the century", subconsciously admitted that he probably didn't deserve the apparent success, that he might be missing out on something in life, and, that he was losing interest in gambling. Firstly, to stop drinking. Secondly, to summarily view criticism as reinforcement his own mental superiority, that any attack of, and oversight by, him, including on VCT, automatically translated into his own mental superiority. Thirdly, to construct overly simplistic straw-man arguments to do with religion, etc, which he, himself, could easily debunk. And, lastly, to direct the more-determined thus attacks, on him, and his debacles, to "the Hand". Specifically, to "take his ball, and, go home," and, next, sneeringly put the poster on ignore. Yes, MrV's Penn & Teller Bullshit Theory-Of-Everything approach to reality was the perfect fit for the real eVil's, who sneakily turned him out in their image. From MrV, in Portland, to sub-station transmitters manned by KJ, in Las Vegas, Tasha in Florida, and, old, Red in Tennessee. Persons who had a lot of shit to shoot, and, the time to shoot it, on the internet. MrV vigorously nurtured, instructed, and cheered, them on, at every opportunity, to as blindly lead them on to say, and do, stuff beyond the limits of sanity. And, so, MrV's Penn and Teller Bullshit Theory-of-Everything reality was the perfect fit for the real eVil's. Unusually though, weirdly - as MrV once wrote - the replacement reality had little effect on the Spikes, and Singers, try as he might. MrV vigorous opposed particular posters because he didn't want any true realities, however bad, in the periphery, to tear through his own version of the replacement reality bullshit to awaken the others. Unusually though, weirdly, the crazy Canuck went back on his meds, just, in time, to write "the rest of the story". MrV, via the aliens, indirectly created Tasha's tales of time travel, KJ's blackjack superhuman exploits, and, old, Red's Hollywood sports betting contest conquests. Regardless, unusually though, weirdly, the "winter storm of the century" lasted just long enough to knock out the extraterrestrials' mind-meld grip on MrV, and then, more importantly, on the people of the Earth. Their misery-loves-company brand of brainwashing the world into an idle mess, a mass of men leading lives of quiet desperation, for their own personal piss-and-shit jollies to escape the severe boredom of their own, lazy world, the Planet-7, of the eVil's, which had, long before, turned into the real Arkanar, by their deliberate ignorance of climatic, ecological, and other, doomsday disasters. "What, me worry?" was the overriding sentiment on the Planet-7, of the eVil's. To the extent that they, themselves, no longer knew how many of them remained after they thus turned their mind-fucking attention exclusively to other worlds. Maybe, MrV, their Earthly incarnated leader, is the last one, except for his 9-year-old grandson, whom he, too, raised in his own image, mockingly groomed in the spirit of Godzilla, Buckaroo Bonzai, and Hard to be a God, instead of in the spirit of Santa Claus, and God. Who gaffaws over the Godzilla, Buckaroo Banzai, and Hard to be a God, shit, but, doesn't have fun at Christmas time, let alone not contemplate the existence of God within even a Theory of Everything? Ah, the "Festivus for the rest of us" mantra. And, the austere deprivation of centuries old pot-stirring Zen anecdotes. Again, I wonder when the last time was that MrV had a quality conversation with even his wife - the one with whom he's supposedly "in good standing" - while getting high on pot in the hi-fi room watching cult-classic movies, or, he's while en route to the local Indian casino in the cars that require endless repairs. Obviously, with the other such "winter storms of the century" on the other planets, too, the eVil's were forced to thus mentally cannibalize each other. To regale each other with stories of childhood slavery at the hands of BB guns, gambling forum altercations at thus meet-ups, killing frogs en masse in the backyard pond, stolen pick-up trucks by members of Antifa, silly lifeless alternatives to Santa Claus, and God, and, their pictures of skinned deep-fried cats, and, so on.
The AP (VCT) prototype project of the Planet-7, of the eVil's ...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q6ZRGzx31iQ
Note the time of the video, which is 7:00. And, the seven spot lights, on the stage, in the video. With 5 letters in the word, seven, so that 7 as ᘔ mirrors to ᘕ as 5. You see, the real V's are from an anti-matter universe, and, so, their V = 5's are the mirrored version of ours, which then appear like a 7, to us. Well, it's not a 7, because ᘔ ---> ᘖ, for 7/2 or July 2, to do with 6 ---> 9, for 1961, as in that young man, from Canada, who was festooned with bird shit by the evil MrV=5 from Portland, in an earlier episode of One A-hole at a Time.
PREVIOUSLY, in the PREQUEL of One A-hole at a Time ...
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheGrimReaper
Now, the DENOUEMENT, Act 2 ...
However, the replacement reality wasn't disrupted all at once. It stubbornly took up to a year to wear off, for many of the thus deluded. Unusually though, weirdly, there was a lot of disjointed rearrangement of the delusions, and nonsensical events, as flashbacks, while things naturally became what they would have been without the replacement reality. Slowly at first, but, in a cascade later on, the inhabitants of the corners of the Earth, such as the VCT forum, including MrV, began to see through the real eVil's. All of Red's, KJ's, and Tasha's, piss-and-shit tales of casino gambling, for the sake of the eVil's, embarrassingly started to hopelessly unravel. With Red, it came to light that he hadn't paid his taxes from the money for that purpose given to him from his old man. KJ was outed as a tunnel-dwelling blackjack imposter who made up a string of very unlikely, and mathematically impossible, stories, which culminated with the broken-arm casino incident. And, Tasha, herself, soon mysteriously lost interest in her own seemingly endless story of the time-traveling A-holes. She went back to her hopeless stories of gambling addiction, cross-town bus rides for minimal free play, and naked pleas for internet attention. Heck, even the crazy Canuck went back to normal living, without any of the anagrams with gematria, or, ever-present Theory-of-Everything brags. Ha. Maybe, also all of his very own usually though, weirdly, numerical, and biblical, revelations, were a result of the replacement reality of the eVil's. Who knows, until all of that, too, naturally comes out in the wash, as opposed to brainwashed, but, nonetheless, it's pretty darn hard to believe that given that the phrasing of the anagrams turned always out better than anything written by MrV. Now I wonder that the anagrams-with-gematria, and thus Theories of Everything, besides the sheer stupidity of the Spikes, and Singers, were the one antidote to the real eVil's. That they were the one thing that the real eVil's had no thus control over. But, come on, man! None of that stuff could have happened except by the replacement reality. No one can be such a hopeless blackjack imposter, and automatic cheating shuffler nut, let alone for twenty years over only the internet with a made-up ditto brother, gay lover, and dead gay husband, and, who, himself, was dead. Nor did Tasha bet every penny, by penny, let alone write a seemingly endless stream of untreated sewage about none other than the A-holes of Guns N' Roses, after opening declaring that a WoV moderator, BBB, was a cunt. No more than the old, sports betting contest guru that no one heard of, Redietz, ran around with Hollywood gangstas, criminally rich Billy Walters, and, the Penn State academics of Bumfuck Tennessee, but, he, supposedly, didn't pay the taxes, etc, for the old man. No, it was all the nightmarish dream of the eVil's replacement reality as passed on by our very own eVil, MrV=5. MrV not only let on that he believed all of it, but, he encouraged, nay, took part in such behavior, and thinking. But, again, no one can be that fucking stupid their own. Right? Shit like that can't happen even on a gambling forums like VCT, and the Wizard's. Even the nearly dead, haggard and forgetful, Wizard repeatedly, lately, banned MrV from his forum, a year after the "winter storm of the century" took out the Snortland portal, and, then, the brainwashing replacement reality over there, too, by way of MrV, mostly fell through. Oh, MrV had sub-station relay transmitters over there, too, such as with the relentless LarryS. MrV rode old, poor LarryS into the ground, until a deranged poster found, and went after, LarryS's car, at which point even MrV's "close WoV buddy", LarryS, began to peer through the replacement reality of the eVil's.
And, of course, everything that happened previously, in the PREQUEL, slowly reversed itself, such as with the A-holes coming back, from Arkanar, to a few more of Tasha's stories, and, next, going back to their own, separate timelines, which resulted in another couple of A-hole rendezvous with the Portland portal, in which MrV's pick-up truck, their thus logical vehicle of choice, went missing, again, not once, but twice. MrV's pick-up truck because he was inherently, but unknowingly, implicated in the patient-0 spread of the thus replacement reality, of the real eVil's. Moreover, lastly, the big VCT "guns", Monet, and TP, intuitively fell silent, because they no longer inexplicably felt compelled to point out the forum posers, and political conspiracies, after the replacement reality, of the eVil's, spread by MrV, mostly fell through, a few months ago. Unusually though, even weirdly, it appeared as thought that that pair would certainly stand the test of time, but, they, too, were an indirect result of the replacement reality.
In general, for years, Christmas was failing, while Trump was wailing, until near the end of the replacement reality, at which point Christmas, at least on VCT, started to come back to life, and, the Trump posters, and their talk, waned. You don't really believe that Trump won the 2016 election, do you? If you do, then you are one of few who still believe in VCT as under the waning control of the eVil's though MrV. Why do think that Druff, himself, was so inactive, unable to turn things around? No, the majority of the people of the Earth have moved on, where Trump, and his SCROTUM, is fast becoming the big joke of the century. Wise up! Similarly, there was no recurring Covid-19 (or beyond) pandemic because there was no Covid-19 pandemic, except in the replacement reality of the eVil's. Unusually though, weirdly, that, too, was another part of the replacement reality, for their shits and giggles. To keep every one's attention from the true reality, which used to amount to every one productively living his/her own life without being a actor on a stage.
UPDATE: Just, in, about the new Jesus of Pot, John Patrick of gambling, aka the "Anointed One", as in the Alpha Omega pot-stirrer, who told people (over the internet) that he quit posting, and, will, again, because of gambling-related issues. And, his family, and friends, that it was a case of prostate cancer. It's actually a matter of karma, for a life time of filthy thoughts, and, cruel behaviors, that he thought to try to get away with. What in the MrV? (The new Sam Hill, of our times.)
"This case report draws attention to the dramatic consequences of the consumption of bad pot. Bad pot contains alkaloids (especially scopolamine, as well as hyoscyamine, atropine and other alkaloids) in a relatively high concentration. When intoxicated with Angel's Trumpet, patients can suffer hallucinations, motoric restlessness, overtalkativeness, convulsive sobbing and sexual excitement, as well as aggressive and autoaggressive behaviour. Somatic symptoms are tachycardia, mydriasis, hypertonia, respiratory disturbances and vomiting, as well as a potentially life-threatening anticholinerg syndrome. In this paper, we report on a young man from Portland who amputated his penis and his tongue after having consumed bad pot, illustrating that consuming this beautiful flower with the name of bad pot and the poison of the devil can be very dangerous."Quote:
Hinduism identifies karma as the relationship between a person's mental or physical action and the consequences following that action. It also signifies the consequences of all the actions of a person in their current and previous lives and the chain of cause and effect in morality.
It took the Little Drummer Boy as the Hand of God (to whip up a winter storm of the century) ...Quote:
No person or entity associated with this film received payment or anything of value, or entered into any agreement, in connection with the depiction of bad-pot products.
https://youtu.be/xQmYtjECXGo
Note that the time of the song in the video is 3:33 ---> 333, and, that, on it's home page, there's only 47 likes = (10*4 + 7) ---> 147 ---> [b]741[b], the suicide-center texting numeral, compared with the Gilbert O'Sullivan song in the SEQUEL/PREQUEL, at a time of 3:34 ---> (1 + 333) ---> 1/333 = 1/√9√9√9 ---> 666, and, with 432K likes = (2 X 6*6*6)K likes ---> 666_666. The Reaper's number of posts, back then, were
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46 ---------------> 46 = (-1 + 47) ---> 147, or 741.
Now, 1Hit1der has 108 posts = (6*6*6 / 2) = (6*6*6 / 6) + (6*6*6 / 6) + (6*6*6 / 6)] ---> 666666_666666.
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On the other hand, Midwest Player, at at https://vegascasinotalk.com/forum/sh...437#post170437 , got no snow, or replies, because he applied the wrong song as a snow-dance song. Given that the rain dance applies only to drums (and sometimes the tambourine, which is a small drum,) and, snow is merely frozen rain, which is illustrated as follows.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kqMCnzdD0CI
Well, unusually though, weirdly, where do you think that the Natives got their idea for the rain dance? From the nativity scene, of course, with the Little Drummer Boy in front of the manger.
At which point, the Portland Pot Stirrer and Puffer V let out a mighty roar, "What am I, chopped liver?!" Well, he, too, started to accumulate all manner of forum resistance such as the mightly MDawg snarling, and, yanking at his pants.
Yes, at first, it appeared as though Tasha was Puff, the magic dragon, but, it was MrV, the Puffer. Ha.Quote:
One grey night it happened, Tasha as little Jackie Paper came no more. And puff that mighty dragon, he ceased his fearless roar. His head was bent in sorrow, green scales fell like rain. Puff no longer went to play along the cherry lane. Without his life-long friend, puff could not be brave. So Puff that mighty dragon sadly slipped into his cave.
Incidentally, here's the full-length version of the Little Drummer Boy. Notice that its time is 25:17 ---> 2517, which reverses to 7152, which is my user-numeral at the gematria forums.
https://youtu.be/LMIW7HR2LOo
So, in the end, God didn't forsake the young Irish man, either, in the song from the SEQUEL/PREQUEL, of Christmas last year. As always, you reap what you sow. And, as an extension to the Bonsai line, "You're in the same uni(verse) as the rest of us, even while you're on the internet."
Whoa! [as the old, MrV, often exclaimed,] the VCT site has gone down. I hope that it comes back up, in a couple of hours, before the new year, for me to post the above climactic conclusion to One A-hole at a Time. Seems like the eVil's are trying to block this transmission, to make one last minute attempt at reestablishing their mind meld on the world. And, until now, they were displaying a degree of success across also the Poker Fraud Alert forum. Those damn eVil mindfuckers. Watch out!!!
*Peering down through a worm hole in the sixth dimension*
"Our plan has borne fruit. Inform Our Leader, MrV, that the rays beamed non-stop at Ontario have achieved the intended purpose. The daft Canuck has spun his last lug nut. Have the 'bots toss him into the Solylent Green vats, but first bring me the draft of his Theory of Everything, I ran out of Charmin;."
*howls of execration and toots of excretion echo through the marbled halls as ten billion savants display displeasure as well as flatulence*
"Begone from this place, for we do the work of the Spheres. Leave Man to his folly.*
---> O! Gee, turn the other way. You are more.Quote:
No matter where you go, there you are!
https://youtu.be/EcOi6npIsVc
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#773 = (1 + 772) ---> 1/772
2:07 ---> 7:02
---> List of references to seer stones in the Latter Day Saint movement history.Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterV
https://anagram-solver.net/Have%20th....?partial=true
MrV, that's because the eVil's have shit for brains. Or, in their mirrored, anti-matter world ... brains for shit. Ha.
Oh, here's a little "number" called, from '66, Good Execrations.
https://youtu.be/apBWI6xrbLY
And at a time of 3:33, or 3:34. Now I wonder how that keeps happening, that the times work out, on my very first tries.
Quote:
Originally Posted by 1Hit1der
Whoa! [as the old, MrV, often exclaimed,] the VCT site has gone down. I hope that it comes back up, in a couple of hours, before the new year, for me to post the above climactic conclusion to One A-hole at a Time. Seems like the eVil's are trying to block this transmission, to make one last minute attempt at reestablishing their mind meld on the world. And, until now, they were displaying a degree of success across also the Poker Fraud Alert forum. Those damn eVil mindfuckers. Watch out!!!
---> The Rising Tide (Shaara novel). [The Rising Tide: A Novel of World War III]Quote:
Whoa! Those darn eVil's are at it, again!
https://anagram-solver.net/Whoa!%20%....?partial=true
VCT has been blinking in/out all day long. Ha.
The next day, they got up and ate and got ready for the day. Axl called Rocking Rick and asked to speak to Rocking Rick and was able to speak to Rocking Rick.
Axl said,"Hi, Rocking Rick. How are you?" Rocking Rick answered,"I'm fine, how are you? Axl answered,"I'm fine, glad you're fine.
Rocking Rick asked,"What's going on, Axl?"
Axl took a deep breath and said,"My Stepfather, Stephen Bailey ran into me and Cake Cream at the latest Cake Cream Show and wants to make amends with me for abusing me when I was a child and a teen. He thinks doing an interview with you will be good."
Rocking Rick said,"I think an Interview between you and Stephen would be good. You guys can talk it out on my Show. Maybe live with a camera crew tomorrow night at 6-8?"
Axl responded,"Okay." Rocking Rick and Axl chatted for a while and then said their goodbyes.
Axl called Stephen and said that Rocking Rick wanted to do an interview with them with a live camera at Y-100 radio station at 6-8.
Stephen said,"That sounds great, Axl. We can really talk out or problems in that interview tomorrow.
Axl said,"Yeah, whatever." He was guarded in his response, still thinking about the abuse Stephen did to him.
Axl and Stephen awkwardly chatted for a while and then said their goodbyes and hung up.
Axl wondered about the Rocking Rick interview for tonight.
He told Cake Cream his thoughts and feelings and Cake Cream tried to alleviate his concerns
Axl smiled a little. Axl was glad he had four loving brothers and a loving boyfriend in Cake Cream. Axl and Cake Cream all chatted and chilled for most of the day.
It was 5 PM, time to get ready for the Rocking Rick interview..
Cake Cream and Axl put on bulletproof vests and motorcycle helmets and went to Y-100. Rocking Rick, Axl, and Cake Cream all chatted amicably.
At 5:50, Stephen showed up and Axl and he chatted awkwardly. Rocking Rick welcomed Stephen and Stephen welcomed him. There was a camera crew there..
Cake Cream said hi to Stephen and Stephen said it back.
It was soon 6PM and the Rocking Rick interview started.
Rocking Rick said,"Hi, l'm here with Axl Rose from Guns N'Roses and Cake Cream and Stephen Bailey, Axl's Stepfather is here! How are you guys doing?"
Axl and Stephen both said,"Good, how are you doing?'
Rocking Rick answered,"I'm doing good too, thanks for asking." Stephen and Axl both said,"You're welcome.
Cake Cream were watching on the sidelines.
Rocking Rick said,"It's nice to have you both here, Axl and Stephen. Axl and Stephen both smiled awkwardly.
Rocking Rick said,"Axl and Stephen, would you like to talk out your differences on my Show?
Axl said,"Sure.
Stephen said,"Okay."
Rocking Rick said,"Good to hear. Stephen, anything you want to say to Axl?
Stephen said to Axl, "I REALLY am sorry for the childhood and teenage abuse I did to you. Can you ever forgive me?
Axl said,"You really fucked me up. I wish you'd been a better Stepfather to me in my young years."
Axl gave Stephen a guarded, apprehensive look, a look that kind of looked like a child who wanted a good Father and got a bad father instead.
Stephen said," I wish I could turn back time and never do that abuse to you."
Axl asked,"Are you just saying that because I'm very successful and wealthy?"
Stephen answered,"No, I truly mean it."
Axl said,"Well, I guess it was better being raised by you than my biological Father who kidnapped me and then raped me as a baby
. At least you never kidnapped and raped me."
Rocking Rick said,"Axl, you've just made a good point."
Axl thanked Rocking Rick and Rocking Rick welcomed him.
Axl said,"But I can't just wave a magic wand and delete all the abuse you did to me, Stephen. "
Stephen said,"I know, but maybe we can start over a new. I really am sorry for the abuse I did to you."
Axl said," "You REALLY owe my younger self that apology, not me technically.
Stephen laughed uneasily.
Axl said," "I have two very successful music bands, Cake Cream and Guns N'Roses. I'm Cake Cream's Lawyer, Manager, Power Of Attorney, Sole Songwriter of ALL of their songs except for their demo, secondary singer, brother to Mike, Jimmy, James and Andy and Billy's Boyfriend. I'm Guns N'Roses friend and front man."
Cake Cream blushed happily at the fact that Axl talked about THEM first before Guns N'Roses. They felt that Axl really did like them more than Guns N'Roses.
Steven said,"You've done really well for yourself. I'm so proud of you."
Axl said guarded,"Thank you."
Stephen awkwardly welcomed him.
Rocking Rick asked Stephen,"Stephen, how has YOUR life been?"
Axl was inwardly curious to know how Stephen's life has been.
Stephen answered,"I am a retired Construction Boss. I worked in Construction for 40 years. I wanted Axl to work in Construction because I wanted him to have a solid career that would pay his bills and put food on his table, but he was always more interested in making music than hard work with hands."
Rocking Rick said,"Construction work is a good career choice "
Stephen thanked him. Rocking Rick welcomed him.
Axl responded,"And now I'm the Manager of the wealthiest music band in the whole world. That's gotta be much more successful than a retired Construction Worker!
Stephen laughed uneasily.
Axl asked Stephen,"Why can't you just admit I made the better career choice pursuing music than Construction like you did?"
Stephen said," Because Construction is a better choice theoretically than making music.
Axl said,"I'm famous around the world for my music? What are you known for? Oh that's right, being my abusive Stepfather!"
Stephen said,"Come on, all of my abuse is in the past and I just wanted to raise you to be able to stand on your own two feet. Nothing wrong with wanting to raise a Stepson who can provide for himself."
Axl said,"I'm wealthy, successful, and am providing for myself, and I did it all without needing to work in Construction. Face it, you were 100 percent wrong about me. "
Rocking Rick said,"Stephen, can you just admit that Axl didn't need Construction Work to become wealthy and successful and that you were wrong about him?"
Axl nodded.
Stephen shook his head. Stephen said,"I made over a million dollars in 50 years by being a Construction Boss. That's wealthy and successful. "
Axl arrogantly said," I earned roughly 500 million in less than a year with Cake Cream and Guns N'Roses." That's even more wealthy and successful than you Stephen..He smirked at Stephen.
Stephen finally broke down and admitted that Axl made better career choices than he did and admitted Axl was extremely wealthy and successful, much more than him.
Axl genuinely said,"Thank you, that's what I wanted you to admit."
Stephen welcomed him. Axl smiled.
Rocking Rick said,"Does this mean the animosity between you two is over?"
Stephen and Axl looked at each other uncertainly. Were they both ready to bury the hatchet and do a truce?"
Rocking Rick said,"Axl, at least Stephen your Stepfather is still alive. Your biological father, William Rose Senior is dead. At least you and Stephen have time to make amends."
Stephen nodded.
Axl acknowledged that Rocking Rick had solid points.
Axl took a deep breath and said,"I want to make amends with you, Stephen."
Stephen said,"And I want to make amends with you too, Axl."
They both smiled.
Rocking Rick said,"Then it's settled. The two of you have made amends." Everybody smiled.
Stephen, Axl, and Rocking Rick all chatted amicably for a while and then the interview was over. Rocking Rick, Axl, and Stephen chatted more and then said their goodbyes. Stephen, Axl, and Cake Cream left the radio station
Stephen suggested to Axl that they go to DQ and have strawberry blizzards; Axl of course agreed.
They entered Stephen's van; Axl waved goodbye to Cake Cream, saying "See ya soon..."
But this was not to be.
Axl first realized he was in peril when he noticed the passenger door had no handle to open it; he looked at Stephen and saw he held a .45 in his left hand.
"You smarmy piece of shit, how DARE you try to shame me?" growled Stephen.
He pulled off the road into a parking structure: it was after hours and empty.
"Now I'll finish doing what I should have done years ago."
With that Stephen knocked Axl out by pistol whipping him.
An indeterminate time later Axl regained consciousness, and discovered he was naked, face down, tied spread-eagled to a four poster bed.
"Like my digs?" sneered Stephen as he stripped off his clothes and approached Axl from behind.
"I understand you're gay, Axl: you might enjoy this."
When it was over Axl concluded that no, he most definitely did NOT enjoy it.
"Now it's time to clean up loose ends" said Stephen, as he chambered a round in the .45; "Say your prayers..."
Mr. V, in your retelling, you are getting Stephen, Axl's STEPFATHER confused with William Rose, Senior, Axl's FATHER. Stephen NEVER raped Axl. He was abusive, mentally, and emotionally abusive to him, NEVER raped him. And keep in mind that Stephen is in his 80's and Axl is 25. Axl's FATHER however raped Axl when he was a Toddler! :eek: I even mentioned in the story that Stephen didn't rape Axl, that was Axl's father who raped him. :eek:Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterV
Now now Tasha, let's not let the facts interfere with a good story.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterV
Hmm. These last two chapters involving Stephen Bailey are some of the hardest Chapters I have written. The REAL world Axl really did get abused by Stephen when he was a child and a teen and even as an Adult Axl would constantly rant about Stephen's abuse. So, I had to incorporate how I feel the real world 25 year old Axl would react to Stephen being back in his life and Stephen wanting to make amends for the abuse.
Why would Stephen want to make amends?
Hell, the old boy'd probably relish the chance to give his former ward a good thrashing, if as they say "history repeats itself."
https://www.reddit.com/r/GunsNRoses/...ey_circa_1967/
Here's a picture of Axl as a child hugging Stephen Bailey. Axl has a happy look of,"This is my Father, who I love," :D and Stephen has a confused and uncomfortable look of,"Why is this random kid I don't know hugging me? :confused:
Tasha, those are "real" people but OBVIOUSLY the characters in your story are not.
I mean...time travel?
Doppelgangers?
Everything you write, and my response, is fiction.
There's no requirement that I must stick to a script.
Fact is, I know nothing of Mr. Rose and his history "in the real world" and that's just fine.
I simply use your story as a jumping off point for my whimsy.
Mr. V, were you able to check out the picture of Axl as a child and Stephen?
I looked at it, but that changes nothing.
This is a work of fiction: anything goes.
Heck, write yourself into it, maybe as the clerk at Walgreen's who sells Axl Viagra.
Whatever, just run with it.
The look in Stephen's face looks like he is VERY uncomfortable like that's some complete random kid he's never met before. I feel that that picture was a foreshadowing to Stephen abusing Axl. :/Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterV
Here's lookin' at ya.
Axl, Axl, Billy, Bobby, Andy, Mike, Dave, James, Jimmy, Jammy, Jemmy, Joomy, Stephen, Dave 2, Melissa, Tasha, Karen, Bobo Koko, and Nathan the man in the penis costume rubbed their collective eyes and stretched their legs as their eyes adjusted to the bright lights. They were in all decked in soft cotton robes and seated in comfortable chairs in a room with soothing ambient lighting that vaguely resembled a Mormon temple. Had they all been together in the same room before, Axl wondered? Back up a minute. Just where the hell were they? The thought was interrupted by a soft voice that seemed to come out of every surface in unison.
"Welcome esteemed visitors. Sorry for the abruptness of what I am about to tell you. This is the year 3024 and you were all recently thawed after having been cryogenically preserved for 1000 years."
The message was interrupted by Billy letting out a pungent squeaker that sent ripples of 1000 year old egg wafting through the room. Some things never change.
"Why the hell was we frozed?" Tasha barked, as she too blasted ass for the first time in a millennium.
The voice continued. "Esteemed guests, you were cryogenically preserved in accordance with the wishes of Axl, who made provisions for all of his closest companions to be preserved upon their deaths. It so happened that each of you met an untimely demise in the year 2024. But thanks to many scientific breakthroughs over the past 1000 years, we were finally able to revive each of you to full health. Soon we will begin the process of integrating you into human society, such as it exists in the current year. Due to the risk of culture shock, we are keeping you quarantined in a special safe house for now."
"Where's my penis costume?" asked Nathan the man who used to have a penis costume but now didn't.
"Where's my frozen pizza?" asked Billy, who wanted more attention.
The voice continued, this time with a hint of impatience. "In the year 3024 it is expressly forbidden to galavant around in a penis costume. And frozen pizza no longer exists. Also, you may be dismayed to learn that ostentatious flatulence is a crime punishable by cryogenic preservation for 1000 years."
"Fuck that," said Billy. "Put be back under for another grand. Hopefully I wake up when farting is cool again and frozen pizza is back on the menu."
Tasha pulled her phone from her hideous handbag and was happily surprised to see that it had held a charge.
Curious about the way things now were, she was able to find an internet site still called "Vegas Casino Talk."
She queefed joyously, logged in, and was shocked.
The same people who'd been there in 2024 were still there, making the same ridiculous claims, arguments, and threats as always.
"Hey Voice" yelled Tasha: "Something fishy is going on here, VCT is still up and running and with the same folks as 1000 years ago. What, are they doppelgangers or did they get frozen too?"
The dulcet Voice answered.
"Uh, well, that's just it, the thing I wanted you to slowly absorb, to avoid shock. Fuck it, here goes."
Tasha rubbed her private parts in warm anticipation; she wondered whether they still had Bingo, and if her free play would still work. She began to pant.
"The world has changed drastically since your day. Over time the benefits of cannabis were embraced by all the peoples and governments of the world. Now it's the three C's: 'continuous cannabis consumption."
The Voice could not be seen, but the inhalation of good leaf was quite audible, followed by the sound of superior cannabis being exhaled.
"We're too blissed out to get anything done. Now all we do is get high, go online, munch out, gamble, and drink."
Tasha was still baffled.
"That's cool, but how is it that the same folks are posting on VCT today, 1000 years later?"
"Oh, that's all AI generated material based on careful examination of the Historical Records from VCT. The entire planet reads it now, it's The Law. Oh, that and mandatory Bingo."
Tasha finished rubbing herself amidst shudders of joy: she was gonna like it here.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterVHere's lookin' at ya.
Keep squeezing out those (gold-dust covered) dollars. Ha.
They went to Denny's and had a nice dinner. Stephen, Axl, and Cake Cream all chatted amicably. Axl and Stephen were glad they had made a truce.
They paid and left. Axl and Cake Cream said their goodbyes to Stephen and vice versa.
Axl and Cake Cream went to the Luxurious Penthouse Suite and soon fell asleep.
The next day, they got up, ate and got ready for the day. The televised Rocking Rick interview vent viral and Fans noticed that Axl seemed to look at Stephen like a child looking at his Father. Cake Cream and Axl blushed. The Fans thought the interview was good. Cake Cream and Axl were happy.
They decided to go to the mall. They put on bulletproof vests and motorcycle helmets and went to the mall. At the mall, Fans asked for autographs and selfies and they all obliged.
The Fans were happy. The Fans and Cake Cream and Axl all chatted happily and then said their goodbyes. Cake Cream and Axl shopped at the mall and then went back to the Luxurious Penthouse Suite and watched some TV. Axl decided to make more "Confessions," for fun.
Axl said,"I'm a black belt in Karate." "I fought in the Vietnam War. "I'm actually an Alien from Mercury." I was on the Titanic when it sunk." "I am a NAVY SEAL. Me and Older Axl are actually twins. "I got eaten by Jaws The Shark. I am Darth Vader." I was the Pharaoh Ramses in a past life.
Cake Cream all giggled at Axl's "Confessions." Axl laughed too.
Jimmy said,"I'll call Older Axl and have him confirm all your claims." Jimmy winked.
The rest of Cake Cream giggled.
Axl said,"Please don't call Older Axl and have him confirm what I just said. He's older a.d won't remember what I said."
All of Cake Cream giggled and asked Axl of he made up complete bullshit again. Axl admitted he made up complete bullshit again. Everybody laughed.
Cake Cream and Axl all chilled more and then went to sleep.
In dreamland, Axl quaked in fear at the huge rear ends hovering above him.
"What hideous world is this, where butts fly?"
But the butts weren't flying; they simultaneously let loose with a blizzard of turds; Axl darted madly to avoid the oncoming feces.
It was then that a wall of urine descended upon him, causing him to be unable to breathe; he was nearly unconscious when...
"What time is it?" he wondered as he awoke from the nightmare.
Several weeks after being thawed out and learning the cultural norms and laws under the One World Government of 3024, Axls and the gang were let out of the safe house to explore the grounds of the scientific research complex in which they were being detained. Luckily, spiders of all species had gone extinct in the 2400s, so they could enjoy a nice roll in the grass. Billy looked up a the sky and was about to propose a game of "what does that cloud shape look like" when he remembered that "what does that cloud shape look like" was outlawed. He had changed his mind about wanting to be frozen again until farts and frozen pizza were back, but he really needed to fart and take a dump right now.
He turned to Tasha and asked, "Can I borrow your hideous hand bag for a sec?"
Unfortunately for Billy and the men in the security room who where tasked with watching a live feed of the gang, Tasha misheard Billy and thought he wanted sex. She stripped down to her birthday suit in 0.001 seconds and was atop Billy in 0.002 seconds.
"Stop!" Billy screamed as Tasha had her way with him. Unfortunately, it was also outlawed to turn down sex. When she was done, a fleet of drone-ponies appeared to take them all to their mandatory bingo session. The drone-ponies were as slow as real ponies in the year 2024, but they had the advantage of not smelling like farm animals nor randomly shitting while trotting. The posse passed by another group of thawed out people who were taking civics lessons on the lawn. Tasha recognized many of the faces and barked,
"Hey, how come Taylor Swift, Travis Kelce, Kim Kardashian, Hunter Biden, Neil deGrasse Tyson, Jeff Bezos, Condoleeza Rice, Mohammed bin Salman, Megan Markle, Prince Harry, and Magnus Carlsen all get to be in a group together? Why aren't they with our group?"
"Um, because we're famous and cool, bitch." said Neil deGrasse Tyson.
"We're Axl fucken Rose!" said the Axls, "We should be in the celebrity group!"
"You mean, you don't want to be with us, your friends?" asked Nathan-sans-penis, dejectedly.
"Hell to the nope, you fucken freaks. Palling around with other celebrities and looking down on the commoners is the pinnacle of celebrity life. That should be my life! Fuck, I really fumbled the bag a thousand years ago! Hey Kimmy, hop on my dick!" Axl barked, but the celebrity group had moved on.
Just then a drone-crow flew over Axl's head, shat on him, and dropped an envelope on the drone-pony's head. He opened it to find a fine for $10000000000000 for violating Rule 879823 Section 8397432. No talking to celebrities unless they speak to you first.
I wonder that the posts don't get longer, on the end of forums. Or that we are left to the posters who churn out longer posts. Perhaps a sign of loneliness, or emptiness in life, respectively. I recall that, when the forum was hopping, the posts were short, and snappy.
... Spasming and Howling, Bowels Loosening and Bladders Emptying, Vomiting Helplessly ...Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterV
Tasha smiled and walked away from her keyboard, having penned the latest chapter in her Great American Novel.
She belched loudly; "Too much okra" she thought, then she let loose with a panty-blasting fart that blew the seat out of her yoga pants: "Too much WoV."
Hungry as usual, she scarfed a half bag of Oreos, two bottles of Yoo-Hoo and two conch fritters, then left her hovel and boarded the Fun Bus to the casino.
En route visions of Bingo danced in her noggin; she'd win every game and soon have the money to leave Miami and return to Nigeria (or was it South Africa?) to live with her "true" people, and not all these white devils.
A man in a penis costume boarded and sat next to her; they struck up a conversation and realized they were both autistic, not that it did any good: when you're fucked, you're fucked.
They walked through the maw of the garish clip joint and immersed themselves in its familiar surreality: "Ah, my people..." she thought before entering the Bingo hall.
Alas, Tasha didn't win anything; boarding the bus back home to the ghetto she cried but comforted herself with a bucket of Pop-eye's wings (new to the menu, hooray).
Broke again, without hope, and late for work: the beat-down goes on.
"I thought that Black Lives Mattered?" she wailed.
Once again rhe Rocks of Reality dashed her False Hopes.
The man in the penis costume, however, had a great night at the bingo hall. He won $234,765 and decided to treat his closest friends to blizzards at DQ. When he got to counter, he was startled to see Axl Rose behind the register.
"Hey, didn't you used to be in White Snake?" the man in the penis costume asked.
"No!" Axl barked, "I was in Guns and Roses!"
"Oh. Cool. So, can I get 10 strawberry blizzards?"
"That'll be $230,000. For here or to go?"
The man in the penis costume pondered what to do with his remaining $4,765. It had been several pages since someone mentioned the lottery, he mused, when suddenly he espied in the distance the glowing window of a 24/7 c-store that sold lotto. Chuck Norris-style, he spin-kicked the air while farting until a fartornado formed, then he alighted the funnel and traveled at the speed of wind toward the store.
The lone cashier was a very bored looking woman whose very long name tag said "KarenNathanKentryKariceTasha," and because the tag was so long and imbalanced it kept poking her in the chin. With trepidation, the man in the penis costume asked for $4,765 worth of Powerball quick picks. The surly woman grunted in displeasure, squatted a bit to emit a pungent barker, then told the man in the penis costume it would take the machine 2 hours and 37 minutes to print that many quick picks. The man in the penis costume said he could wait all night.
Hoping to lighten the mood, he said to the cashier "Hey, did you know Axl Rose from some 80s band now works at that DQ up the road? Wild. He must have blown all his millions on drugs to be working there now."
KarenNathanKentryKariceTasha's eyes widened and the vein on her forehead began to bulge. "Some 80s band????" she growled through gritted teeth. "Axl Fucken Rose was in Guns N' Roses you penis freak."
"Oh yeah, Guns and Roses, sorry my bad," the man in the penis costume said meekly.
"It's not 'and' you asswipe, it's capital N with an apostrophe incorrectly placed on the right!"
KNKKT could no longer contain her rage and began thrashing and utterly trashing the store. Shit, there goes my quick picks the man in the penis costume mused.
As it happened the local gendarmes walked in, intent on getting their fix of "free" donuts.
"Whoa" said Barney; he put his bullet in his revolver, pointed it at the berserker clutching a hideous handbag, and yelled "Freeze, Mammy, you're under arrest."
A surprised clerk let fly a deuce, soiling her yoga pants; they really stank up a storm en route to the hoosegow.
The following morning she appeared before Judge V. for her first appearance; she quaked in fear as she watched him adroitly weave a hangman's noose from his supply of rope.
"Next victim...I mean, next case" he said, his eyes glazed from too much coke, his colon closed from too many opiates.
The jaded jurist checked the time on his Patek Phillippe Grandmaster Chime 6300A while letting fly a blast of gas that ruffled the beehive hairdo of his clerk.
"The first case today is that of KarenNathanKentryKariceTasha ; please come forward."
The defendant, clad in a Mickey Mouse top and yoga pants sticking to her ass cheeks with smelly, dried and encrusted feces, stepped forward.
"You are charged with Riot, Mayhem and General Assholery; how do you plead?"
At that moment the stout oak doors of the courtoom burst open and all eyes swung to espy the new arrival.
A swarthy fellow in a cheap suit entered and said "Judge V., I represent this woman."
Judge V. had not seen this fellow before, and asked "What is your name, counselor?"
"My name is Arabic and impossible for westerners to pronounce, so just call me "The Hound."
This resonated with the aribiter; "Have you discussed this case with your client?"
"Not yet your holiness, I just flew in from Tahoe and boy are my arms sore."
Judge V. was not amused.
"Humor is prohibited in my courtroom; I am holding you in contempt. Bailiff, take this filthy dog to the kennels."
Sans an attorney, KarenNathanKentryKariceTasha was now eligible for a court appointed attorney.
"I am appointing Axl Rose as your attorney in fact."
Ecstatic, she profusely thanked him and was welcomed.