Darryl's Background Story! :D

[Tasha]

Hi. My name is Darryl Johnson and I am a 16 year old at Marshall Johnson prep school. This institution was founded in 1898 when a very entrepreneurial son of an oil owner had a vision of creating a school for young scholars.

His name was Marshall Johnson, and after a rough start (his family and friends didn't believe he'd make it), he proved them wrong by having a successful school in Jacksonville, Florida, that was the envy of other prep schools such as Brian Macarthur's Academy in Pennsylvania, and Maxwell Andrews Prep school in Boston, Massachusetts.

But enough about the start of the school. This is about me. I entered this school on a scholarship that my mother forced me to apply for. That's right. Forced me. She found out I had been living a wild life.

I was mugging people, robbing convenience stores, burglarizing homes (red alert security alarms and Rottweilers that bite in homes ain't pretty I tell you), and hot hot-wired cars, stole them, and took them out for joyrides.

My friends Julian, Sean, and Mario, contributed in my "wild life" too. We made lots of money "earning it" if you get my drift. My mother did not like how I "earned" my money and gave me an ultimatum: Boot Camp or Boarding School. I'm no dummy. Who wants to get up at 5 A.M. to do 100 push-ups and clean floors with toothbrushes?

And I don't even LIKE the military (no offense to people in the military). And if you scream at me, I will scream at you back. In Boot Camp, that's called insubordination. And insubordination makes your whole "platoon" get punished for it. And they don't take kindly to people who make them work even harder.

So I chose boarding school. My mother went to my school, North Miami Senior High School, and talked to the principal, Mr. Kurns about getting me tested for scholarships to go to prep school. He agreed, and I ended up taking three tests in one day. (I got to miss a whole day of classes though, wink, wink). The three tests were FCAT, SAT, and an IQ test.

I started on the FCAT first. I had questions at first such as, "What is the square root of 16?" Easy stuff at first, then it got harder, such as, "If Johnny is standing next to a 30 foot pole and he is 6 feet tall, how tall will his shadow be? You know that kind of question. I panicked a little. I am not good at Math. I'm smart at other subjects, but Math is my bane. Give me Science, give me Social Studies, give me Language Arts, I'll ace those subjects. Give me Math and I shrink.

My Math teacher says that I have Math Anxiety. I AM good at basic Math: Addition, Subtraction, Multiplication, and Division, but when the Math problems have "pi" and "radius," I start to shrink. Do you know how "well" I did on the question about Johnny? I multiplied 30 times 6 and got the answer 180 and put it down.

Now, I KNOW that's wrong, but I answered it like that. And you have to explain how you got your answer in little "essay" lines provided on the FCAT test (many questions are multiple choice, but some are "essay" questions.) I actually told the truth about how I did it. I KNOW that the evaluator of my test will go, "Whoa, this kid is lazy", but it's not really "laziness." It's more of, "I want to get this problem out of my face."

I was sure I aced the other portions of the test. They were, Reading, Science and Grammar. I'm really good at those subjects.

After the FCAT, it was time for the SAT. I LIKE the SAT because you don't have to do any "essay" answers. It's all multiple choice. I did GREAT in the other subjects besides Math, and when it came to the infamous MATH, I didn't know if I did well. Once again, the first questions were easy like questions about exponents and equations. I'm good at that remember? The ASMD comes easily to me.

So does PEMDAS (Parentheses, Exponents, Multiplication, Division, Addition, Subtraction). Many people say the best way to remember the order of operations is as, "Please Excuse My dear Aunt Sally," but I don't like to remember it like that. I like to remember it the way it is spelled. PEMDAS (Pem-das). I'm probably the only one who likes to remember it the way it is spelled.

Then the questions got harder. I had another "Johnny" type of question. "If Sarah is standing next to a 20 foot ladder and she is 5 feet, how tall will her shadow be?" I quickly multiplied 20 times 5 and got 100. But I could not put "100" because there was no "100" on the multiple choice.

The choices were A. 500 feet, B. 320 feet, C.120 feet, D. 200 feet, and E. None of the above. I didn't want to pick "E" and the answer WAS one of the choices, so I decided not to pick "E." I chose "C" because that was the closest to my answer. Lazy, lazy, lazy, I know. I had a question about the Pythogeroum Theroum, and just blindly picked an answer (AKA. Random Guess).

After the SAT was done, I got a 20-minute break. I went to a fountain and gratefully drunk from the fountain. The water was so good to me and so refreshing, that I ended up drinking for almost two minutes.

Then I went to the bathroom and peed. (Drinking water for almost two minutes does that to a person.) After that, I got a bag of chips from the vending machine. It was a big bag of Lays. I slowly ate my chips, savoring the salty, fatty taste of the chips. I love that combination, even though I know it's not good for my health.

[pinchingyourballs]

If Da'Qwan is x feet tall and stands next to a vertical pole that is y feet tall, you can't tell how long Da'Qwan's shadow will be without an essential piece of information: the length of the pole's shadow. The reason why Darryl cannot answer these fictional math questions is because they are poorly written. Maybe you should stick to describing the various sodas and snack foods your characters eat and forget about trying to describe the academic content they encounter at school.

[Tasha]

I finished eating the chips in 10 minutes. As I wondered the main hallway, I looked at the familiar green paint under white paint. Our school colors are white, green, and gray. I realized this would be my last week or so at North Miami Senior High School. I was overwhelmed by shocking sadness. I would miss this school.

I would miss my friends and family. It all depressed me deeply. I began thinking of a John Mayer song, “No Such Thing.” Two lyrics go, “I wanna run through the halls of my high school. I wanna scream at the top of my lungs.” To make me feel better, I did just that.


I walked to one end of the hallway, and then ran to the other side of the hallway screaming like a maniac. Don’t worry. I don’t usually do this, and this was a regular school day.

If anyone was walking around and saw me doing that, they’d call the men in white coats to come and take me away to a nice “hospital”. I felt much better after running and screaming (I’m surprised no one heard me screaming), and went back to the testing room. It was time for the IQ test and I cracked my knuckles and prepared to work.

The IQ test was fairly simple. It had a few math questions, but none that made me “shrink”, like asking how tall a person’s shadow was. Some questions asked about logical reasoning such as what design comes nest. I told you, I’m no dummy. All you have to do is follow the pattern closely. There were questions about other things, such as History questions and the other subjects I always ace. One IQ question kind of did make me “shrink”.

It was a question that went something like this: “If all Spinks are Sporks and all Voors are Vines, are Sporks also Vines?” I know I did not word that correctly, but you know what question I mean. I have trouble answering those types of questions. The best way I answer then is Yes. My reasoning is: Kelly can have a sister, Charlene, and Kelly can have a brother named John, but John and Charlene are not related.

After the IQ test, I turned all three of them into the proctor, and went home.

Things were tense between my mother and me. I am an only child, and my father and mother were never married, so he doesn’t live with me or raise me.(That’s right, I’m a bastard, even though the nice way is to say illegitimate, even though that doesn’t really sound nice at all.

The best way to describe what I am is a love child.) He begrudgingly pays child support for me. Begrudgingly. He should not begrudgingly be paying child support for me. He helped make me didn’t he? But back to my mother and I.

“Darryl, I don’t want you going out anywhere. You’re to spend your time at home,” she told me firmly.

“Mom, I’m 16. You can’t keep me locked up like a little boy, “I whined.

“I can when my grown teenager earns money by “earning” other people’s money and “borrowing” other people’s cars."

“But mom”,…….. I began to whine, and then closed my mouth. Arguing with her was futile.

I went up to my room and flopped on my bed with the blue covers and colorful shapes. I know. Even my covers look childish, but I like them anyway. They’re “homey” to me.

I turned over on my back, and stared blankly at the ceiling. Would I pass the tests? Would I go to boarding school? Or would I have to wake up to, “Hut, two, three, four?”

I got up and looked at my last report card. A.A.A.A.A.……EEEEEEEEERRRRRHHHHH. (Imagine a car suddenly screeching) D (In Mathematics) I would have made the honor roll if it weren’t for that Mathematics.

(I wanted to add a “D” word between the word “that” and the word “Mathematics, but I decided against it, no pun intended). I’m really smart. It’s just that I make dumb decisions for fun like “earning” money and “borrowing” strangers’ cars.

I turned on the T.V. “And no TV until you finish your homework!” My mom yelled.

“I don’t have any homework mom. I took the tests today, remember?” I yelled back.

“Oh yeah. So how did it go?” She asked me, coming into my room.

"They were fine, except for, I began to confess sheepishly, the Math questions. I am sure I bombed on the FCAT and SAT Math portions. I think I passed the IQ Math portion, because the questions were about basic Math."

“You HAVE always had trouble with advanced Math problems, “she agreed softly.

I looked at my mom intently. My mom is really pretty. She is 5’5, with short hair like Halle Berry in the early ‘90s and Toni Braxton in the early ’90’s. She is so light, she is considered “red”. “Red” is when a person’s skin is so light, it looks like Sean Paul’s skin color. “Gina from Martin is considered to be “red” too. My mom’s eyes are a golden brown, like Bow Wow’s. She’s a slender woman.

As for me, I am 5’10 with a short afro like Cole from Martin. I am a little “husky” like Malik Yoba. My skin color is light-skinned, considered caramel. I’m a few shades darker than my mother, and the best way I can describe my skin color is that it looks like Chingy’s skin color. My eyes are dark brown, like Usher’s.

“Mom, do you think I’ll pass the tests?”

“I’m sure you will. You’re very smart. Look at this report card.” She motioned to my report card. "Besides Math, you are a genius. You just behave “dumb” when you “borrow” cars and “earn” money.”

I blushed a little. Did she have to bring that up right then?

“I love you, Darryl,” she said, looking at me with shiny eyes.

“I love you too, mom," I said back.

She gave me a kiss on my cheek. She left the room. We have DirecTV, and I wanted to watch Spongebob Squarepants. There’s something I love about that little sponge. He’s very adorable and lovable.

I watched an episode where Spongebob wanted to be a “Jellyfish.” He gave up his “industrial, cold life” to live with the jellyfish. The episode was called “Nature Pants.” A word to the wise: Patrick is pretty possessive about Spongebob (Not in THAT way, wink wink). He just wants Spongebob to come back because he misses his friend.

After the episode was done, I turned off the T.V. for a while and listened to my Ciara CD. I listened to the “One Two Step: and “Goodies” songs. I have a confession to make: When I first heard “Goodies” on the radio, I thought that it was Beyonce singing the song. My cousin Tasha said, “No that girl DOESN’T sound like Beyonce.” She was right. I ended up feeling “hurt” when I found out I was wrong. “Hurt” is a slang word for standing corrected.

Speaking of Beyonce, I LOVE her! I LOVED her in Destiny’s Child and Solo! I have all of Destiny and Beyonce albums! I have: the Writing’s On The Wall, Survivor, Dangerously In Love, and Destiny Fulfilled. She is PERFECT! What a Goddess! I am so jealous of Jay-Z. What does she see in him? She can dump him (I’m available, wink wink).

I took out the Ciara CD and put in Survivor and listened to the songs, Survivor, Say My Name, and Bootylicious. I love to jam to those songs. After the songs were done playing, I took out the Survivor CD and listened to my “Hits of The 80’s” CD. I have 18 hits on that CD.

I love the 80’s. Wasn’t that a great era for music? I listened to 5 songs off that album, “Cruel Summer by Bananarama, “Putting On the Ritz by Taco. “Somebody’s Watching Me” by Rockwell, “She Blinded Me With Science” by Thomas Dolby, and “Walk Like An Egyptian” by The Bangles. When I was done with those songs, I pressed, ‘Stop,” and called Sean.

“Sean, my moms got me on lockdown. I can’t go nowhere, dawg." (I am good at Grammar, but I talk “slang” when I talk to my friends).

“Dawg, that’s messed up,” Sean said.

“My moms straight busted me. She’s trippin’," I continued.

“Yeah, she is trippin’. Fool, your old lady got you locked.”

I suddenly didn’t feel like talking about “lockup” too much anymore. “So, Sean, you still gonna “earn” money with Julian and Mario?”

“Fo sho *beep* he answered. “Ya know, me, Mario and Julian scored $300.00 muggin’ 5 people yesterday.

“Wow. Ya’ll don’t need me,” I said, feeling left out. I know, it’s stupid of me to feel left out.

“We DO need ya. We ain’t the same without ya, dawg.”

“Well. Ya’ll gonna be leanin’ on each other for a LONG while," I answered him.

“Since your moms got you on lock down, what you gonna do for fun?” Sean asked.

“Watch T.V, listen to the music, play video games, do my homework,” I answered him.

“Ya call doin’ homework “fun”? Sean asked me sounding incredulous.

“Yeah. It’s basically all I have to look forward to. My moms said, “I can’t go out nowhere,” I reminded him with emphasis.

Sean said, “Well, I gotta go. I’ma holla at ya later.”

“Bye,” I said, and we both hung up.

Sean, Mario, Julian, and I have all been good friends since we were little. We are the Inseparable Foursome. We are all tight as four peas in a pod. We have little squabbles from time to time, but we always make up.

Rarely, we do get into BIG arguments, like the time Sean got a girlfriend and spent all of his time with her, and no longer spent time with us. We were so mad, we thought of kicking him out of the friendship.

We confronted Sean and told him we wouldn’t take a backseat to this girl and would stop being his friend if he continued to neglect us. Sean decided to balance our friendship with his relationship and we forgave him. He and his girlfriend broke up 6 months later because she felt that she didn’t like him too much anymore. We all consoled Sean, and he quickly got over her. I think.

The other “big” argument was the time when we robbed a convenience store and left with $1000. We argued over who should get the bulk of the money. Sean, Julian, and Mario wanted more than $250.00 from $1,000. ($250.00 is what each person gets from $1,000).

I told them that they were idiots because that was the only way four people could split $1,000 evenly. They called me a control freak and we almost had a physical fight right then and there. I had a sudden light bulb.

I didn’t want our relationship to end like this, over money. So I suggested that all three of them get $300 and I get $100. They asked if I didn’t want more than $100, and I told them no. So they were happy with the $300 they got, and I was happy with the $100. I got. $100 is still a lot of money, especially when you “earned” it.

[The Boz]

The REAL story behind Darryl

Darryl being a 16 years old black got hooked on Newports and 40’s of malt liquor at an early age, but also being black was poor and had the street smarts to get what he needed without working.

His usual hookup was the ugly lady at the local Walgreens who turned her head when he came in for a special favor. He would like clockwork grab a 40 of Hurricane in the morning and sit on the curb and drink it, knowing it was the best part of his day. 15 minutes later he would be back in for another one, along with the pack of Newports the ugly cashier would selectively place for him to steal on the way out.

This repeated itself daily over and over until Darryl would be shitfaced drunk and the cashiers shift was over. He waited for her, knowing the bell was about to toll and it tolled for thee. As she carried her hideous handbag out the door, like the drunken puppy he was followed her to the bus stop. She had a crooked smile on, enough of a smile to show her deformed teeth, but also enough to show Darryl she was going to get her payoff for turning her one good eye to his thefts.

As they arrived at her rapidly deteriorating shack she called home, the cashier started working up Darryl’s “reward”. Darryl had lived this life too many times, wondering how smelly and big the log would be today. As the cashier dropped her pants, he assumed the position, ready to take her smelly shit on his chest. But he noticed something different this time, a lady with a crack pipe sitting in the corner pleasuring herself.

To be continued!

[MisterV]

OMG...who could resist?

Mammie's back!

___________________________________

"What, you ain't ever seen a gal fuck herself with a crucifix before? No? How about Regan in 'The Exorcist?' "

Darryl had missed seeing such a thing before but he gazed in awe as the cross plummeted her depths while the body of a crucified christ rubbed and tickled her bulbous, swollen clit, over and over.

Mammie soon had to put down the crack pipe as she shivered, shook and barked at the image of Kobe on the kitchen wall, her thunderous orgasm nearly knocking the painting off its supportive nail and on to the stained linoleum floor.

"Whew...I needed that. OK, you kids finish up, I'll just watch..." and she reached for the Fireball, smiling, sated, satisfied.

Darryl had an idea.

"Hey Karen, instead of just shitting on me like you always do let's mix it up a bit. You know I have gay tendencies, dontcha? Well yeah, I do. So why not try using that lady's crucifix on me? I ain't got a clit but my prostate could give me a tingle."

Karen frowned, not wanting to give up the cathartic pleasure of shitting on Darry and having no clue as to what a "prostate" might be, but it was soon mutually agreed that she'd first shit on him, then ass fuck him with a crucifix.

Life is sweet when both parties get what they truly want and need.

[Tasha]

Back to the near present. I love those guys. I don’t know if I would be able to take being so far away in Jacksonville while they were here in Miami. I’d miss my mom and dad (though he REALLY doesn’t want to pay child support for me), my aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents.

I soon got that overwhelming feeling again. That overly sad feeling that I got at school. I was feeling deeply depressed again and I was afraid I was going to fall into a depressed trance. I decided I did not want to become slightly comatose, so I decided to shake my head and ‘snap out of it.” I went into my book bag and got out my “feel good” book, How To Eat Fried Worms by Thomas Rockwell.

I always read that book when I am feeling blue. It makes me laugh to read about people who would be stupid enough to eat worms for $50.00. The T.V. show fear Factor comes to mind when I read this book. These people will do ANYTHING to win money. One guy stuck his face in pig blood to pick out pig parts. Disgusting, but funny. I read some of the book and felt better. I was not overly depressed now, I was just a little bummed.

It was now 6:00. I turned on the TV to TVONE and watched Good Times. My favorite characters are Thelma and J.J. Thelma is fine and smart and J.J. is cool and funny. I don’t like Michael too much. Too me, he’s annoying and my least favorite character. I watched an episode called, “J.J. And The Boss’s Daughter.” J.J. dates Valerie, his boss’s daughter. Valerie wants J.J. to ditch his friends to hang out with her. Does this seem familiar?

After the episode was over, I ate some dinner and then took a shower, a little after that, I watched American Idol. I love watching people who CAN’T sing but think they can sing. I am an American Idol whore. I love when Simon harshly criticizes the ‘singers”. I swear, some of these “singers” are singing badly on purpose. But it makes for good television. One guy butchered a Michael Jackson song. I think it was “Thriller or maybe it was “Billie Jean.”

When American Idol was over, I watched another episode of GT. This time, it was an episode where Thelma wanted to be engaged to Larry. I felt so jealous. Larry was so lucky. Anyway, Mrs. And Mr. Evans (Florida and James) were against it. J.J. stood up to James for Thelma, and Thelma proved she really did love Larry, and that she wouldn’t marry Larry until they were both at least eighteen. (She had been 17). Her parents agreed to let her remain engaged to Larry.

After the show, I went to bed to go to sleep, I know, it was pretty early to go to sleep. It was only about 9:30, but when you are stuck at home, there’s really not much to do but sleep at this time (besides, I was tired). I fell asleep, and dreamt that I was in an airplane, and not only was I in the plane, I was piloting the plane. All of a sudden, the plane got out of control. It hit major turbulence and began shaking like crazy, and even began taking a nosedive.

The stewardess, the passengers, and my co-pilot were screaming, and what’s worse, even I was screaming and I’m supposed to look in control. I knew I couldn’t let everyone on the plane crash and die! I had to fix the problem. I pulled the shift stick, aligned the plane, and got us back on course. The plane glided smoothly, and passengers were crying. Out of relief or shocked fear, I don’t know. I turned to my co-pilot and he looked at me with awe and incredibility. “You really had us scared for a minute, Captain, but you pulled us out of trouble,” he said gratefully. The stewardesses looked a little disoriented, but okay. “That was a close one, Captain, “one of them said to me.

“You know how I do it,” I said a little smugly. I was getting a little cocky. Then I woke up.

I didn’t think much of the dream after I had woken up. I’m 16. Who would give a 16-year-old a pilot license? I laughed at the thought.

I looked at the clock. I t was 3:00 AM. I was still tired, so I went back to sleep.

I had another dream. I was riding a ride in the Youth Fair, and the ride got stuck in mid-air. I was terrified! I looked at the sign of the ride. The Ride Of Doom. How ironic, “I thought. Granted, it WAS fun until the ride got stuck.

The other people looked terrified too. I literally was stuck in the air. Some people were stuck close to the ground. I looked at my partner and he looked terrified too. “Someone help us!” I screamed at the top of my lungs. “Sorry,” the ride operator said. “You guys are stuck here. The ride is stuck. I’m going home. You guys will be fine when the electricity works again, which will be soon, I think.” He sounded unconvinced.

“Hey, you can’t just leave us here!” an angry voice yelled. “Hey, get us off this ride!” Another angry voice yelled. “Yeah! I have to get off this ride and go home!” Another angry voice yelled. “Sorry,” the operator said. “I’m leaving!” He started to walk away. A flurry of obscenities and profanities spewed out of the angry riders’ mouths. The operator looked helpless at us, and then ran off. He left us abandoned.

I decided to do a risky thing. It literally could have hurt me badly. I unbuckled the safety latches and seat belts and leapt out of the ride. Remember, I was in mid-air. I luckily landed on both feet with just a bit of a painful jolt as I landed. I quickly latched and buckled my partner back in, so he wouldn’t fall out. I already knew what I was going to do. I walked over to the operating station. I figured out quickly what had gone wrong. A wire had broken in half.

I quickly found another way to get the ride moving. I manually turned the dials and pushed a few buttons. I got the ride started again. I went as fats as I could and the ride went relatively fast. When the ride was over, I slowly pulled the ride to a stop. The riders were now all close to the ground. I pressed a button to release all latches and safety belts, and everyone got off the ride all right. They all looked shaken.

“I’m suing!” a few of them angrily exclaimed. “I am filing a report on this ride!” a few others exclaimed. “I’m never going on this ride again!” some others exclaimed. I didn’t blame them for saying those things.

“You are a hero young man!” a woman in her 20’s said to me, looking at me with bright eyes. “You saved us all!

“Yeah young man!” You ought to be on the NEWS!” a man in his 30’s said to me, shaking my hand. I smiled self-consciously. Then someone took a camera and surprised took a picture of me. My partner came up to me and gave me a hug. “Thank you for saving us.” I smiled and hugged him back. He looked to be about 12 years old.

Then I woke up. I was still smiling as I woke up. I had saved people on that ride! I felt happy! I looked at the clock. It was 6:00. It was time for me to get ready for school. I showered, brushed my teeth, put on lotion and deodorant, and put on my red T-shirt, blue jeans, white socks, and white Nike sneakers. I quickly brushed my hair, packed my book bag, and left my room to eat a bowl of Fruit Loops cereal. After breakfast, I got my book bag and keys, said “bye” to my mom and got into my car and drove to school.

At school, I was a little early. It was 7:15. School starts at 7:25. I went to the library which has computer access and went on www.amazon.com and typed in “Snoop Dogg”. When Snoop Dogg search results showed up, I clicked on “Doggy Style.”

I read some reviews about the album, such as one who said, “This album is great. I love the song, ‘Gin And Juice. That’s’ my favorite song from Snoop Dogg. All of the songs on this album are great! He’s a great rapper! 5 stars! Another review was not glowing at all. “I give this album a 1 star. Snoop Dogg is a washed up crack rapper. He has very little talent and ALWAYS looks stoned when he is on T.V. And that is because he is! I’m glad I didn’t buy this crap piece of trash. My cousin let me borrow it for free. I wish I could burn this CD, and not in the term we in 2005 say we want to “burn” CDs. I want to burn the CD in the literal way, with lots and lots of fire. Snoop Dogg needs to go away……………forever.

Whoa, harsh I thought. I read other reviews, and the stars and reviews were excellent. Basically, all the reviews were glowing except for that one harsh review. Overall, the CD got a 4 and a half star rating.

[pinchingyourballs]

Hey look what I found

http://www.paceadvantage.com/forum/s...d.php?t=158536

https://www.mjjcommunity.com/threads/the-ex-thug.91192/

And here's a gem:

https://www.mygnrforum.com/topic/226558-weird-gnr-fans/

"Does she obsessively make new threads on not defunct guns n' roses forums about the first thing that enters her head, too? ... Does she have a thousand plus word creepy fan fiction referencing homoerotic encounters, as well?"


I have to hand it to V and Boz for developing a non-pharmaceutical alternative to Ozempic. These Mammie tales are real appetite killers.

[MisterV]

Gotta say, this tale cannot hold a candle to Axl Rose et al: very poorly conceived and written as if the writer were a juvenile autistic Jamaican.

I stopped following it but I'll still flame ... it's what I do.

________________________________________

Mammie stuck the enema up Karen's nether eye and said "Damnit girl, stop that butt winking at me."

"Oh Mammie, you knows I and I jus' caint help myselfs sometime. 'Dat doctor, he say I and I has issues."

"Girl, you best learn to control yo' asshole or else you is gonna be in a world of hurt."

How prophetic, as when Karen was later undergoing her colonoscopy the surgeon stopped mid-probe and asked sua sponte: "Did her asshole just wink at me?"

"Yes doctor" said nurse Nathan, "It was a double wink."

Fully aware of relevant Catholic canon law Dr. V stopped the surgery and had Karen wheeled to a "secret" room deep in the basement of the ancient Catholic charity hospital.

Thunder peeled, lightning flashed.

"Assemble the team" he intoned, and soon a team of incense waving exorcists surrounded the newly awakening ghetto dweller, who groggily asked "Where am I?"

"Are you a good witch or a bad witch? Which?"

"I and I ain't no witch."

"She denied it! They always do. That proves it. OK boys, get to work..."

With that they strapped her down and alternated tickling her unmercifully and whipping her with thorns, all the while belting out GnR songs; this went on til she passed out and continued for two days whenever she regained consciousness.

At last her butt hole passed inspection: no more winking, just the usual nasty cling-ons.

"You can go home now, but DON'T DO IT AGAIN!"

Back in the ghetto Mammie swilled her Fireball, puffed her crack pipe and said "See? Told ya so..."

[Tasha]

Hey look what I found

http://www.paceadvantage.com/forum/s...d.php?t=158536

https://www.mjjcommunity.com/threads/the-ex-thug.91192/

And here's a gem:

https://www.mygnrforum.com/topic/226558-weird-gnr-fans/

"Does she obsessively make new threads on not defunct guns n' roses forums about the first thing that enters her head, too? ... Does she have a thousand plus word creepy fan fiction referencing homoerotic encounters, as well?"


I have to hand it to V and Boz for developing a non-pharmaceutical alternative to Ozempic. These Mammie tales are real appetite killers.

For the Guns N' Roses Fan Website, I basically was put on Thread Probation where the Admin was like,"Please stop making so many new Guns N' Roses Threads. It's overkill."

I am banned from Pace Advantage after starting like 67 posts in three years . Problem was, I made like 58 posts in like three weeks and I admitted I was banned from other Websites before. I specifically said that I was admitting I was banned because I didn't want to get banned from Pace Advantage too. The Admin said something like,"Should this Poster be banned and about 30 people said yes, 28 people said o and like 20 people were neutral"

A Poster stood up for me saying something like,"I REALLY don't think she should be banned. She made 58 posts in three weeks, 67 in three years. The Greatest Horse Jockey made 58 posts just today and he doesn't have a thread asking if he should be banned. I feel it's unfair to her when The Greatest Horse Jockey made 58 posts in ONE day wheres her 58 posts count was over three weeks. Her posting equivalent was only about 3 posts a day for three weeks."

The Pace Advantage Admin banned me anyways and admitted he banned me for admitting I was banned from other Websites. I REALLY didn't care about Pace Advantage though. I was using them until my Suspension from VCT was over and I was going to abandon them again when the Suspension ended. Before my banning I straight up implied I would be leaving Pace Advantage soon.

About the MJJ Community, on a now defunct Website, Posters were roasting me for posts I made on the MJJ Community Website. I hadn't visited MJJ Community Website in three years at that point. I replied something like,"I lost interest in Michael Jackson three years ago and stopped visiting the MJJ Community Website.i can't believe I'm getting roasted over posts I made at least three years prior.

[pinchingyourballs]

Hey look what I found

http://www.paceadvantage.com/forum/s...d.php?t=158536

https://www.mjjcommunity.com/threads/the-ex-thug.91192/

And here's a gem:

https://www.mygnrforum.com/topic/226558-weird-gnr-fans/

"Does she obsessively make new threads on not defunct guns n' roses forums about the first thing that enters her head, too? ... Does she have a thousand plus word creepy fan fiction referencing homoerotic encounters, as well?"


I have to hand it to V and Boz for developing a non-pharmaceutical alternative to Ozempic. These Mammie tales are real appetite killers.

For the Guns N' Roses Fan Website, I basically was put on Thread Probation where the Admin was like,"Please stop making so many new Guns N' Roses Threads. It's overkill."

I am banned from Pace Advantage after starting like 67 posts in three years . Problem was, I made like 58 posts in like three weeks and I admitted I was banned from other Websites before. I specifically said that I was admitting I was banned because I didn't want to get banned from Pace Advantage too. The Admin said something like,"Should this Poster be banned and about 30 people said yes, 28 people said o and like 20 people were neutral"

A Poster stood up for me saying something like,"I REALLY don't think she should be banned. She made 58 posts in three weeks, 67 in three years. The Greatest Horse Jockey made 58 posts just today and he doesn't have a thread asking if he should be banned. I feel it's unfair to her when The Greatest Horse Jockey made 58 posts in ONE day wheres her 58 posts count was over three weeks. Her posting equivalent was only about 3 posts a day for three weeks."

The Pace Advantage Admin banned me anyways and admitted he banned me for admitting I was banned from other Websites. I REALLY didn't care about Pace Advantage though. I was using them until my Suspension from VCT was over and I was going to abandon them again when the Suspension ended. Before my banning I straight up implied I would be leaving Pace Advantage soon.

About the MJJ Community, on a now defunct Website, Posters were roasting me for posts I made on the MJJ Community Website. I hadn't visited MJJ Community Website in three years at that point. I replied something like,"I lost interest in Michael Jackson three years ago and stopped visiting the MJJ Community Website.i can't believe I'm getting roasted over posts I made at least three years prior.

Tasha, do you have a user account on every single forum on the internet? Here are three random forums

https://www.dendroboard.com/forums/
https://vampfreaks.com
https://dinotoyblog.com/forum/index.php

What are your usernames on these forums? What kind of gay fiction do you post there?

[The Boz]

Darryl never realized how much he would enjoy the cashier shoving things up his ass, even if it was by an ugly woman who enjoyed shitting on him.

He told her he had a great idea and asked if she wanted to watch him drink some more 40’s and do a sing along to his favorite Johnny Rebel song. The cashier said “I beez lubin muzic, is it’s dat Guns & Roses cuntry tuff?”

Darryl said no, this is what should happen to us black folk, the motherland is calling us. And this song is about those nice white folk offering us a free trip back, complete with alcohol. The cashier said I never heard it but I’ll listen. So Darryl starting playing it and by the 3rd verse the Cashier was singing along, through the gaps in her teeth.

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
Gather all those equals up and herd them on the pier

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
Twenty million ugly coons are ready on the pier

"Hey there man, I ain't gettin' in that boat, looks like that boat's leakin' to me, man," (whack!) "Ooooh yes, White Man, here I come!"

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
Boats are ready for the trip, we won't shed a tear

"You actin' like you don't love us nice colored folks any more," (whack!) "Ahhh! Ahhh, White Man brought us from Africa, your fault!"

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
Hand that chimp his ugly stick, hand that buck his spear

"Hold on there man, I've left my bottle of wine back there on the dock," (whack!) "Ahhh! Oww, man!"

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
Twenty million jigaboos, to Africa we'll steer

"How we gonna find Africa man, we ain't got no compass, how we gonna find that island, man," (whack!) "Ahhhh! Ahhhhhhhhh!"

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
There they go far out to sea, see them disappear

"Hello, hello back there on the dock, I believe this boat is leakin' man."

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
Boats are leaking badly now, they sink, we've settled here

"Help! Help, we're sinking! Gggglllluggggg..."

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
No more nigger civil rights led by nigger queers

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
Our homes, our schools, our city streets of niggers will be clear

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
America will be all white, the land we love so dear

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ship those niggers back
Ship those niggers back

As the tune finishing the Cashier was in a tizzy unlike any other she ever felt, even more so that the day Popeyes ran out of chicken.



She said “I beez wanting to go backs dere toooes.” “But furs dat ders mty bottle looks goods”. And she went on to explain how she watched Mammie pleasure herself with empty 40’s for years but was always afraid to try it herself…

To be continued!

[Keystone]

Darryl never realized how much he would enjoy the cashier shoving things up his ass, even if it was by an ugly woman who enjoyed shitting on him.

He told her he had a great idea and asked if she wanted to watch him drink some more 40’s and do a sing along to his favorite Johnny Rebel song. The cashier said “I beez lubin muzic, is it’s dat Guns & Roses cuntry tuff?”

Darryl said no, this is what should happen to us black folk, the motherland is calling us. And this song is about those nice white folk offering us a free trip back, complete with alcohol. The cashier said I never heard it but I’ll listen. So Darryl starting playing it and by the 3rd verse the Cashier was singing along, through the gaps in her teeth.

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
Gather all those equals up and herd them on the pier

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
Twenty million ugly coons are ready on the pier

"Hey there man, I ain't gettin' in that boat, looks like that boat's leakin' to me, man," (whack!) "Ooooh yes, White Man, here I come!"

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
Boats are ready for the trip, we won't shed a tear

"You actin' like you don't love us nice colored folks any more," (whack!) "Ahhh! Ahhh, White Man brought us from Africa, your fault!"

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
Hand that chimp his ugly stick, hand that buck his spear

"Hold on there man, I've left my bottle of wine back there on the dock," (whack!) "Ahhh! Oww, man!"

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
Twenty million jigaboos, to Africa we'll steer

"How we gonna find Africa man, we ain't got no compass, how we gonna find that island, man," (whack!) "Ahhhh! Ahhhhhhhhh!"

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
There they go far out to sea, see them disappear

"Hello, hello back there on the dock, I believe this boat is leakin' man."

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
Boats are leaking badly now, they sink, we've settled here

"Help! Help, we're sinking! Gggglllluggggg..."

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
No more nigger civil rights led by nigger queers

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
Our homes, our schools, our city streets of niggers will be clear

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ring that bell, shout for joy, white man's day is here
America will be all white, the land we love so dear

America's for whites, Africa's for blacks
Send those apes back to the trees, ship those niggers back

Ship those niggers back
Ship those niggers back

As the tune finishing the Cashier was in a tizzy unlike any other she ever felt, even more so that the day Popeyes ran out of chicken.



She said “I beez wanting to go backs dere toooes.” “But furs dat ders mty bottle looks goods”. And she went on to explain how she watched Mammie pleasure herself with empty 40’s for years but was always afraid to try it herself…

To be continued!

Lol…excellent work

[MisterV]

Posters were roasting me for posts I made on the MJJ Community Website. I hadn't visited MJJ Community Website in three years at that point. I replied something like,"I lost interest in Michael Jackson three years ago and stopped visiting the MJJ Community Website.i can't believe I'm getting roasted over posts I made at least three years prior.

______________________________________

"wow, it's been three years since the Jamaican Joke got her ass booted from the board and the top thread is STILL the "Tasha discussion thread."

"Yes, never in my lifetime have I seen so much written about someone and something so unimportant."

"Amen, brother. But we really do have reasons to rag and drag her. Like how she said Michael couldn't REALLY walk on the moon 'cause his feet would get mired in all the green cheese."

"LOL, oh yeah, and who can forget her 'Michael isn't strange, it's the world that's strange' "

"Remember how that V guy mocked her for months after she talked about having dreamt of marrying Michael and having his child without having had sex with him? She said that since they're both asexual it was a Miraculous Conception."

"Ah, but who can forget her behavior at the forum's "meet 'n greet" held at the Church's Chicken in Miami? Talk about a show stopper, a knee slapper and a butt blaster."

"What a hoot; that Tasha shit the floor like a draft horse, the MFD had to use a fire hose to flush it out the door."

"Indeed, that gal was something. Not sure exactly what she was, but I'm sure glad she's gone off to infect other forums...she imploded MJJ."

"I heard she's submitted some of her stories to that esteemed site "True Passages:" rumor has it she's been hoping to put aside her asexual affectation and blow the admin. there hoping to get an edge."

"A girl's gotta do..."

[mcap]

Wow Boz, some of the things in your post were VERY offensive.

[Tasha]

Posters were roasting me for posts I made on the MJJ Community Website. I hadn't visited MJJ Community Website in three years at that point. I replied something like,"I lost interest in Michael Jackson three years ago and stopped visiting the MJJ Community Website.i can't believe I'm getting roasted over posts I made at least three years prior.

______________________________________

"wow, it's been three years since the Jamaican Joke got her ass booted from the board and the top thread is STILL the "Tasha discussion thread."

"Yes, never in my lifetime have I seen so much written about someone and something so unimportant."

"Amen, brother. But we really do have reasons to rag and drag her. Like how she said Michael couldn't REALLY walk on the moon 'cause his feet would get mired in all the green cheese."

"LOL, oh yeah, and who can forget her 'Michael isn't strange, it's the world that's strange' "

"Remember how that V guy mocked her for months after she talked about having dreamt of marrying Michael and having his child without having had sex with him? She said that since they're both asexual it was a Miraculous Conception."

"Ah, but who can forget her behavior at the forum's "meet 'n greet" held at the Church's Chicken in Miami? Talk about a show stopper, a knee slapper and a butt blaster."

"What a hoot; that Tasha shit the floor like a draft horse, the MFD had to use a fire hose to flush it out the door."

"Indeed, that gal was something. Not sure exactly what she was, but I'm sure glad she's gone off to infect other forums...she imploded MJJ."

"I heard she's submitted some of her stories to that esteemed site "True Passages:" rumor has it she's been hoping to put aside her asexual affectation and blow the admin. there hoping to get an edge."

"A girl's gotta do..."

I wasn't booted from MJJ Community. I lost interest in Michael Jackson and stopped posting on my own.

[pinchingyourballs]

I wasn't booted from MJJ Community. I lost interest in Michael Jackson and stopped posting on my own.

It would have been better for your finances if you had lost interest in gambling and thus gambling forums while maintaining interest in Michael Jackson.

[MisterV]

Now now, let her spin like a dradel, it's how she's built.

Most humans progress linearly: Karen zigs, zags and veers.

Yeah, there IS something wrong with that.

[The Boz]

I wasn't booted from MJJ Community. I lost interest in Michael Jackson and stopped posting on my own.

It would have been better for your finances if you had lost interest in gambling and thus gambling forums while maintaining interest in Michael Jackson.

Best advice anyone ever gave her but wasn’t worth the time wasted writing it.

She’s addicted to the gambling thinking in her shallow mind that it will change her life.

[MisterV]

She’s addicted to the gambling thinking in her shallow mind that it will change her life.

Actually Boz, gambling has most certainly "changed her life," given the fact that when she's not working or shitting the flo' she's either in a casino or posting on internet forums, often about gambling.

The thing is that so far gambling has been a real NEGATIVE for her, she needs to turn it into a POSITIVE.

The girl needs to increase her bankroll and bet big at low vig games, not slots.

My suggestion: she should embezzle as much as possible from Walgreens, then con all her "casino friends" to "loan" her a huge gambling stake; then take a Greyhound to LV and be mentored by the Great Hound.

Yes, let that pinaccle of truth, honesty and the Arab way lead her down the yellow brick road to the Promised Land she so desperately seeks.

He'd show her how to slay the casinos at baccarat wihile getting fully comped for it; soon she too will be able to purchase and close on a seven figure LV mansion, just like he said he did.

[The Boz]

Ah that reminds me of a story.

Tasha was fearful but full of excitement, the type of excitement she got on Tuesdays when KFC ran the $10 bucket special. She was going on a grand adventure unlike any she ever had before, but she was semi smart enough to know it would change everything for her. As she second guessed her choice, Mammie was the voice telling her to go, for her own selfish reasons of course. “Chili, you beez needn to does dis. It’s yo chance to get outs of Miami and see udder countries.” Since Mammie herself never left Florida she didn’t realize Las Vegas was still in the United States. “Its beez just nudder bus ride and they eben have dem tings to shit in”. “Oh Mammie yous no I don’t need dem” said Tasha.

So off to the Greyhound station on NW 21st Tasha went, carrying multiple Polaroids of her snatch in her hideous handbag to trade for a bus ticket. She also carried everything she owned in the suitcase that had been handed down generations in her fambily and once traveled the whole way to Orlando. Up to the counter she went and asked for a one way ticket to Las Vegas while pulling the snatch pics out for the worker. The cashier stated $69 and a frown came across her face, one worse than the day she found out the McRib was going away again. This grand adventure was over before it started unless she could think quickly, something she had never done before in her life. Tasha said but I don’t have any money, my casino friends are going to take care of me once I get there. But I have a special skill that comes in handy at times she thought, I’ll drop my granny panties and threaten to shit on the floor.

Tasha told the innocent Greyhound worker she was getting upset at the thought of not going to see her friends and change her life. And she may have an accident if she didn’t get on that bus. Ding, ding, ding, a bell went off of the cashiers head, as it buzzed at what he was hearing. He couldn’t believe it but he had possibly met the famous white whale he had heard of. He often smoked crack and drank with a young man named Darryl who told him a mythical tale of someone who could shit at will and often did it on his chest for allowing him to shoplift where she formerly worked. As Darryl had sucked him off before and he liked the kid, he figured he would save Darryl some aggravation and get her out of his shit coveted chest hair.

He told Tasha he was going to do her a favor and get her on her way for free if she didn’t shit on the floor. She thought “Mys luck beez chngn alreafy”. Not one for details, she only glanced at the ticket and failed to see New Mexico listed after Las Vegas as the cashier laughed hysterically as the bus pulled out.

To be continued.